Can i stop or lessen a bipolar episode?

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, anxiety, ptsd and ocd at 15 during a 72 hour hold. I was on meds until 18 but then I couldn't afford them so I stopped taking them. Somehow I got better on my own, had a baby got a job almost normal. Then my baby died and cps took my toddler. I got pregnant again but lost that baby too. I think the trauma of losing my kids like that has triggered my bipolar. Problem with that is I have a job and a good boyfriend but I'm about to lose both if I don't stop acting like a crazy person.
Any suggestions on how I'm supposed to do that?
I can't afford therapy or meds so those are not options for me.
Any input would be helpful

I'm so sorry for what you've been through. These are very traumatic, stressful and life changing events. I am also quite shocked that you were diagnosed with 4 different disorders during a 72 hour period, especially Bipolar, which I think I've read is generally not diagnosed until after age 18. Did you have a therapist and someone to manage your meds up until you turned 18? Can you reach out to them for referrals?

You say you can't afford therapy or meds, but it really sounds to me like you need help to work through this. If you are in the states, there are non-profit organizations that can help you and provide references to providers, and maybe help you get on a program that will help you pay for meds (if needed).

Here is a link for the non-profit mental health association: Mental Health Support - Mental Health Recovery and Advocacy

Another resource is organizations such as Catholic Charities and United Way that may be able to help.

Best of luck and please keep in touch. Hugs out to you.

I am saddened by your story and wish you feel able to find help somewhere. School counselors, free clinics etc... your children probably miss you so get out there and look for help for yourself so you can get better... i don't mean to be mean but you have to love yourself first before you can get better which i think is what you want. good luck

Just a little factoid, the biggest bump is diagnosed in that late teen, early twenty lump; but there are like three clumps in the diagnostic timeline, mid 30s being one; and 50'ish being the other. But it is diagnosed all through life. I was diag'ed at 51.

OP:
If you can't afford meds, please check in with the charitable organizations mentioned by others here, they can point you in the right direction to get the care you need. It is available, its just hard to find and access.

I'm sorry you've experienced so much loss and trauma in your life. I hope the resources listed by the previous posters works out. If you can figure out how to get in with a pdoc, they can help you get patient assistance with your meds. Good luck and best wishes.

Med companies offer free meds for people with low income or no insurance. I have Medicare but can't afford a few of my meds and get this assistance. It just takes a quick application that you and your doctor fill out and sign and a note explaining why if you need an exemption into the program. After that they will send you free meds for a year.

There really are options out there.

I am very sorry for your pain.

I strongly encourage you to check all resources.

It sounds like you do need care via a pdoc, med assistance, in the least.
It's possible you were misdiagnosed in the past. A pdoc could help you with diagnoses, with scripts and maybe with med samples.

When mental illness gets out of control, meds are usually needed to help.

Are you in the U. S.?

What type of a "Bipolar episode" are you experiencing?

Knowing whether or not you are in the U.S. may help people in suggesting possible resources.


WC

Wow, that's a lot to go through.

Found a community MH center. At the one I go to they give patient assistance and free samples to start off with. They also have sliding scale so it may not cost anything or a small amount.

Sorry for your losses.

I've seen some other posts over the last couple days where people were diagnosed in their mid-teens. I have read somewhere (no clue where at this point) that generally MI professionals don't diagnose Bipolar in teens (prior to 18) because of the emotional instability that can come with just being a teen, but I'm sure there are situations where that has not been followed and where symptoms overrule that. My daughter was diagnosed Bipolar 2 a month after she turned 18 while IP. Her regular PDoc isn't convinced she is though. I'm not a professional by any means, just a Mom.

The others have posted good advise. I have nothing to add in the form of advise but you have my sympathies and I'm deeply sorry for all you've been through and lost. My heart breaks to read your story. Please be kind to yourself and keep reaching out for help. It's ok to need and ask for help. ((Hugs))

There are really cheap meds on the market check you're local stores for those meds My meds would cost $14 if I was on the generic pills at sams club.

Yes I'm in the states. I wasn't diagnosed with everything at once. They wanted to keep me longer but I begged my mom to go home so she signed AMA papers and took me home. Then cps made me go see a psychiatrist who made the diagnoses over time. They kept changing my meds but I don't remember why. The 2 that worked best were ambien and remeron or something like that

I may have been misdiagnosed. It may not even be bipolar. I don't ever really feel super happy. All I know is I'm doing a lot of the same thoughts and behaviors I did back then.

Starting and continuing pointless arguments no one can win

Spending money I don't have

Talking nonstop and not making sense to anyone else

Feeling like everyone is plotting against me and nobody wants me around

Leaving a mess everywhere I go

Starting things I never finish

Jumping into other people's conversations

Working really fast or really slow or both

Making up stories....things like that. Oh and time seems to either drag on and on and on or fly by. I'm always late and everything seems to take soo long

Those things you describe sound more like manic/hypomanic symptoms than anything.

Benzo's and lithium are cheap as can be. They would help to lessen an episode in a pinch. Not advocating using benzo's in place of an AP but they are proven to work if one can't afford an AP. Plus lithium at therapeutic levels is also great for mania.

BP used to be treated without expensive Atypical Antipsychotics (AAP).

It can still be treated without them.

I agree with bioChE, you sound like you're speeding up!

Can you get some help soon?


WC

I admire how you are striving to keep yourself together during such tragedy in your life. I am in a program called safety net which pays for my mental health visits and have coverrx which pays for my blood tests and discounts my meds. You can google safety net and download application. I started by calling a sliding fee clinic and they helped me with the paperwork. Hope this helps . God bless

Thank you all for your help and advice. I spoke to my mother who reminded me that the meds seemed to do more harm than good so I'm going to try to live without them.

You can call 211 in most places in USA and find assistance. Call and tell them you haven't insurance but need mental health help. There are also support groups that could be a place to find help. Groups like nami, DBSA and others. Google around and see if there are warm lines in your area they may be able to point you in the right direction too.