[Blueberrybook]

I have an endoscopy and colonoscopy coming up soon due to getting quite anemic since August 2018. Everything to do with my red blood cells has plummeted from normal. I'm pale. My lips have practically no color, my nails look weird, just a bit of exercise makes me lose my breath (I could easily run 10 miles a few months ago), and to top it off, I'm eating so much crushed ice from the refrigerator ice maker, I am having to routinely push the "more ice" button so it will make extra ice, and I doubt it is good for my teeth. Many days now, I just want to eat ice with a bit of Powerade Zero, but really it's about getting the ice. This is a form of pica, I guess associated with low iron, and they don't really know why it happens. I have been eating ice since January though it has picked up a ton since then.

None of the usual culprits are the cause; I haven't had any heavy bleeding, haven't had a change in diet (except the huge ice craving), and the drop is so steep, it is not dietary.

That brings them back to worrying about internal bleeding, especially since I had repair on a perforated duodenal ulcer Feb. 2018. So the GI doc wants an endoscopy & colonoscopy fast. I am tentatively scheduled to have it done on Tuesday but need prior authorization from the stupid insurance. If the doc's assistant can't get it by 5 PM tomorrow, she will let me know, I won't have to drink the prep stuff. However, in the case the insurance does approve it, and to be prepared for that, I have to be on a clear liquid diet all day tomorrow to be ready to start taking the prep stuff at 5 PM. So whether or not I get the authorization, it's clear liquid diet tomorrow until I know. Otherwise, I might get scheduled for Thursday or possibly the next Tuesday, but I'm going to push for Thursday as hard as I can as I have been feeling like crap physically, and it seems to have been getting worse fast.

My mood is up and down but a bit manicky too and anxiety meds aren't doing a thing. Supposed to see the T tomorrow, depending on how I'm doing.

I'm scared too. Really scared. I don't want another surgery. I want them to be able to fix the problem easily. There are all these other things that can happen after gastric surgery, leading to low iron and vitamin deficiencies, but I don't know what the doctor will find.

I think I'm getting manicky because ironically one of the symptoms of anemia can be insomnia. Thinking maybe I should just take 100 mg of Trazodone instead of 50 mg, or maybe do 75 mg, so I can sleep at night. I know the less sleep I get, the more manic I tend to become.

Just tired, cold and scared...sigh.

[Shadesofdark]

Sorry to hear this is going on. I hate insurance co's, it is not right to keep you hanging like that, I hope it works out and you can be done on Tuesday. I also hate having a colonoscopy, as an older male I have one every 5 years and I feel your pain, I would rather do about anything besides prep for one. Can't really give you any advise, but I will be pulling for you to have it done on time and have the results be something simple. Sleep well.

Sending best wishes that it all goes smoothly and is not too much trouble to fix.

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm so sorry you're going through all of this, Blueberrybook! It must be very hard for you! I understand what you mean and why you'd feel scared. Surgeries are definitely scary for everyone! I completely agree with what all the other wonderful people on this thread have already wisely said better than I ever could! I wish you the best of luck and my deepest good wishes that things will go well and that they'll be able to find an easy and painless way to make you feel better! Please do take good care of yourself becaure you're WORTH IT! Please remember that! Keep us updated and let us know how it goes, Blueberrybook! You know we all care about you here! We all love you here! Feel free to vent and write here as much as you need and want! You know we won't judge you! I promise you that! Sending many hugs to you, Blueberrybook! You're in my thoughts and prayers and I'll pray for you that everything will go well and that you'll feel better soon! I hope things will get better soon for you! You deserve to get better and to feel good! You deserve to feel good and to live an happy, fulfilling life just like everyone else does! Keep fighting! I'm so sorry you're have to deal with all of this, Blueberrybook! You don't deserve to suffer at all! Nobody deserves to suffer at all, certainly not you! Keep fighting! Remember that you're an awesome, strong warrior! Please remember that! We all believe in you! Please try to believe in yourself the same way we all believe in you because you ARE WORTH IT and you're much STRONGER than you even realize and think of yourself! You're awesome! You're strong! You're a warrior! I believe in you! We all believe in you! We're all rooting for you! We're all cheering you on! Keep fighting! You deserve to get better and to feel good! Please remember that! Keep fighting and trying your best like you're already doing! Please believe in yourself!

Best wishes.. I hope it is nothing.

[Sunflower123]

Best wishes that everything turns out ok. I’m sorry you are going through this.

[Blueberrybook]

The endoscopy and colonoscopy did not show an exact cause of why my iron is so low. However, the upper endoscopy did show I have a hiatal hernia now, and I've been having some symptoms with it. Those can cause low iron too, but the doc had me go to the lab yesterday to get blood drawn for a full liver panel as I had slightly elevated liver enzymes during my previous bloodwork. He's also testing B12. He took some biopsies during the procedure, so I have to wait on those results. I'm following up with the GI doc in 2.5-3 weeks.

I'm still anxious about everything. I do see the T tomorrow though.

[luvyrself]

So the great thing is that they are moving forward on all this. Whatever needs to be done will be done. Waiting like this is never easy, but its not like sitting around unaware that something is happening. You are very good at staying on top of medical things. Some people ignore all the signs and are in denial. They are in danger. But you have been alert and they are doing what needs to be done.You have always been so brave about your issues. You are a Warrior Woman! I think its easier to fight when we are up than when we are down. Continue to keep us posted. We love you. Hugs!

[RainyDay107]

Hi honey

I am sorry you are going through so much. I have pica, too. Ice is life. Sorry if I sound trite.

The two procedures—I had both and I bug with why but DO NOT worry about them. The only icky part is drinking the lemony stuff which isn’t all that bad.

I hope it goes well for you. Sending positivity your way.

[RainyDay107]

Ugh! Well I need to delete this.

I am sorry you are having continuing problems and I have....well, if you ever need to chat etc about nutrition iron etc. I am here. I do not have answers but I remember. Hug xx

[Moose72]

I'm glad your colonoscopy prep went ok. I have one on wednesday coming up and I hate the prep. Its totally disgusting! I am having a lower and upper. The last 3 times I've been scheduled for this they've had to cancel for some reason! I've had that prep several extra times since Novermver 2018!

[luvyrself]

What does treatment for a hiatal hernia involve? Can you give us an update on everything. How did tackling yr ptsd w the new therapist go? Of course a one thing at a time approach is necessary when physical issues dominate things.

[yakmom]

Blessings and wishes that you will have Peace during these procedures and all will be well.

[Blueberrybook]

Totally forgot I posted this thread (very forgetful lately). Thanks for the support. And yes, prepping for a colonoscopy is God awful. Now I have to have a capsule endoscopy, and the prep for that sounds nearly as bad as the colonoscopy prep.

[luvyrself]

I have switched into one thing at a time mode lately myself.
My back just went out when things got too stressful. So now I have no choice but to slow down . My body is definitely telling me something.
I will try to be mindful. I hope spring is lovely in yr town. Thinking of u as always.
Hugs.