Your Best Techniques For S Prevention

doing childhood things and being childlike

I want to live the childhood i never could or was allowed to

and if that means swinging on a swing in a park going "weeeeeeee", so be it.

I go on because of my family that includes my pets because they are family. I would never want to do that to my Mother because I know she would be the one to find me. I have already frightened her with my former self harming behaviors. I just couldn`t do that to her. In my most painful times I just try to sleep through though that`s not always easy. So sometimes I just cry alone in my bedroom , the shower ect. I try my very best to get through my very rough patches because I think there might be happier times ahead which is not always easy to do. Then I think of good times with my family and concerts with my younger sister and nieces and the pleasure I find in listening to my favorite artists like Morrissey and The Smiths and petting my dogs and talking to my turtle and the Guinea Pigs. Just simple things in life that I am grateful for. I`m not married and I don`t have children but I love my nieces and nephews as if they were my own and I go on for them too. I guess those are the reasons I have to not do it. I also pray to get through things and that also gives me comfort and the will to go on.

Sometimes, when I am on my bike and see a doggie, I say' "yay!! Puppy dog!! Hooray!!" 90 percent of the people laugh. The other ten look at me like I am bonkers. Which I am, so it's cool

hahhaa I say puppydog too!

yay!

I have a letter that my eldest wrote for me in 4th grade. Its lovely. I should remember to read that.

I guess this shows that S isnt much of a threat for me: there have been a couple times when I disagreed with my brother about family matters and he is very critical. He is type A and the superstar of the family, so it's hard to do affirmations when I compare myself to him. I try to not to make comparisons, or at least choose someone more worthy for a comparison.
He gives orders like "dont bring up certain things, dont call me, always email."
On the two occasions when he really got to me and I was mulling things over, it always seems like it would be a lot more trouble to make a plan to call it quits than to just keep trying. So, I conclude Im not really in much danger. I hope I would tell my t.

Good for you for staying so positive!

My brother is a total a-hole 'achiever.' N
Have not spoken to him in 8 yrs and feeling super positive about continuing to take care of me by eliminating him from my galaxy.

Hugs.

Number one....I keep a self care box....so fun stuff tucked away for later...I pull it out as needed and then replenish it with stuff for all five sense...I use it when I’m starting to notice depression so it’s not too late to work.

Number two all my plans are delayed....they require time to enact, which gives me a buffer. Basically I’ve got two potential plans one requires shipping from like Australia and th other is merely dangerous so....the point is I’d have time to get better.

what do you have in your " self care box"

I have a grounding box.. I guess it's sort of the same thing, though mine is if I feel I might have a flashback or something

I once told my t that i had been pretty despondent the night before, but my bathtub was too disgusting to get into.

Growl. Sounds like a couple of ''relatives'' of mine

A wise woman once said, I'd rather have one real friend than 10,000 relatives...

I have a lot of bath stuff, like Soap, bath salt etc. I also put some books, one on dinosaur art, one on silk painting. I have a couple of toys like squishy foam and a magnetic art thingy. I have some photo books from the last few years with my family and bf. It’s actually a little sparse right now but another good thing to put in is gift cards...ie visit Starbucks or iTunes ...new music is a must when you’re feeling down. At one point I had a new pair of silky pjs. Anything that makes you feel good is fair game. It’s important to fill the the box when you’re happy and use it when you’re not. If you wait nothing will seem particularly interesting or fun....but if you fill it up when you’re a little hypo or something it’s like delayed retail therapy.

Crusty was the word i used, not disgusting. Couldnt think of it before.