[Mountaindewed]

This morning went fine. I ate a chili cheese dog from Sonic. Then I took my first walk of the year. I went to see my primary. In the elevator some guy was being a bit weird and he said to me “can you believe it man?” So I felt good because I felt like I was passing as a guy. But he was weird in the office and didn’t understand if it was 6 feet and a mask or just one or the other. And then he said “I gotta step out and take a breath.” So then he went out and I got called into the office. And my primary was nice and I told him about the PMS being the main issue I think and he said I’d need to go to one of the bigger fancier hospitals in order to get the kind of stuff I’m looking for. My gynecologist told me the same thing although she was *****y about it. My mom doesn’t want to be driving that far when we move and I don’t feel like arguing with her about it. I’ll ask my therapist what she thinks. Then the nurse did an EKG because of my high pulse. It was awkward because I feel like my chest looks really off from my surgery. And she asked when I had it done and I told her and then we talked about it but she said it’s mainly the scaring that’s the issue. But then I had to take a 6 minute walk around the office with the pulse thing on my finger and that was awkward because I had deodorant all over the front of my shirt. And that guy was in the office checking out when I was walking around. But the EKG and walking thing were ok. I left with the name of a doctor who does the work I’m looking for and some lab work I’ll get done at the same time as my kidney blood work since I didn’t fast this morning.

But I see my surgeon later this afternoon and I’m honestly really nervous. I want him to fix my chest and I hope he is willing to help me out. He said he would when I saw him in January but I don’t know if he’s still thinking about it.

Every single doctors appointment I’ve had this year has backfired on me. I’ve either been told it’s just anxiety or stress or a med reaction or I’ve been given a referral to a hospital that’s too far away.

[*Beth*]

We're having an intense thunderstorm today, really rumbling! Hair cut in a little while, which gladdens me, as the ends are dry and need to be trimmed. I'm feeling a little defeated after my pdoc appointment yesterday. She keeps saying I'm on too many meds, then she is reluctant to allow me to go off a couple of them. I fully accept that I need to be on some meds, but why so many- that I don't understand.

@buddha1too @Soupe du jour
My bachelor's is in Spanish. Indo-European languages are my strong suit -- 6 years of Latin and dabbling in most romance languages. German is one I play with a lot, it uses grammatical cases just like Latin and I love that. Oddly enough, grammar is my strong point --also reading/writing are my best developed areas in any language.



Asian languages are appealing, especially for the challenge they bring. Mandarin has been a lot of fun, but with little practice (I use a pen-pal site some, but not much anymore) it can be isolating for sure. Japanese is a newer interest of mine, but it's been fun so far! I hear the grammar is pretty complicated, we'll see if I enjoy the challenge or not. To be honest, I'm more overwhelmed with the intensity of the idea of respect and honor in Japan. I'd be scared to death to even attempt to speak to someone for fear of being rude or disrespectful! There are very specific and formal phrasing and etiquette required. That's actually the most daunting thing I've learned so far!


It's really cool to see a shared interest in language here! Glad to know I'm not alone

[Sunflower123]

I’m going to my daughter’s college graduation in May and I’m already preparing for it. I want to try out a new hair style and I don’t know whether to try it now or closer to time. I’ll have to sit by my ex-husband which will be deeply unpleasant. I’m already working on a plan of action in therapy.

The vaccination went smoothly. I had fatigue within a few hours but that’s it. I slept 9 hours last night and feel great today. I understand the second dose is where you could see flu like symptoms. I’ll be happy when it’s over and I’m protected for the most part.

[buddha1too]

Originally Posted by MarcusAurelius

I hear the grammar is pretty complicated, we'll see if I enjoy the challenge or not. To be honest, I'm more overwhelmed with the intensity of the idea of respect and honor in Japan. I'd be scared to death to even attempt to speak to someone for fear of being rude or disrespectful! There are very specific and formal phrasing and etiquette required. That's actually the most daunting thing I've learned so far!

No worries! They cut gaijin (foreigners) a lot of slack. Just making an attempt to speak someone else's native language goes a long way. "Ugly Americans" just assume that if one speaks English LOUD ENOUGH they'll understand!

It sounds like you're naturally talented where languages are concerned. You're very fortunate. They entailed a lot of very hard work for me. Keep up the good work! I wish I had an intense interest like that!

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

I’m going to my daughter’s college graduation in May and I’m already preparing for it. I want to try out a new hair style and I don’t know whether to try it now or closer to time. I’ll have to sit by my ex-husband which will be deeply unpleasant. I’m already working on a plan of action in therapy.

The vaccination went smoothly. I had fatigue within a few hours but that’s it. I slept 9 hours last night and feel great today. I understand the second dose is where you could see flu like symptoms. I’ll be happy when it’s over and I’m protected for the most part.

Aside from your ex (which you'll work out) - how exciting! I love graduations. Neither of my kids did traditional univ graduations; one was at university in Paris and the other graduated during covid.

Good news on your vax! I'm getting my first one on Tuesday.

[Moose72]

Here I am with my "new" car! It is much better than the old one! It needs new tires but that's easily fixable.

[Nammu]

Very nice moose! Love the color. Looks like a smooth ride too.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Nammu

Very nice moose! Love the color. Looks like a smooth ride too.

The inside is the same champagne color, too. It is very smooth. It was the luxury model in 1998. It has a CD player but we can't get it to work. It has a tape deck but who has tapes anymore? If I could figure out how to put music on my phone, I have a converter for that. The radio works, but the display does not- there's a trick to being able to see it, but I couldn't do it, so N2 set up a "favorite" radio station for me. It also is very "zoomy" compared to the old one! No brake problems, etc. I hope we can get a decent amount out of the old one. I paid my daughter for the car just a bit ago. Big chunk of change! But cars are like that- even used cars. My daughter's car is a brand new Fusion! All the bells and whistles! Bonus that she works at Ford. She got a good deal.

So right now I'm making chicken wings but I'm going to eat them WITHOUT the hot sauce to avoid the migraine again. I'm going to eat them with Ranch to dip, but no other sauce.

[Uykulu]

I couldn’t sleep . it is 03:01 am and I am thinking....

[*Beth*]

Moose, congratulations! Nice car!

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by BethRags

Moose, congratulations! Nice car!

Thanks! I am enjoying it!

[buddha1too]

That car is really clean...no rust, dents, etc. Your daughter must have taken great care of it, Moose. Enjoy!

I lost a correspondence that mattered a lot to me today. The guy was gracious and said he was having a mental health crisis. I understand and everything, but still it hurts.

My sleep is not smooth but i'm logging the hours so my benzo taper is sustainable.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by buddha1too

That car is really clean...no rust, dents, etc. Your daughter must have taken great care of it, Moose. Enjoy!

Thank you, @buddha1too ! Yes, she did take good care of it.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by whatever2013

I lost a correspondence that mattered a lot to me today. The guy was gracious and said he was having a mental health crisis. I understand and everything, but still it hurts.

My sleep is not smooth but i'm logging the hours so my benzo taper is sustainable.

Was this a long-term relationship? A pen pal? I have a pen pal (since 2003) - if he stopped writing me, I'd be very upset. He already told me its hard on his back to sit and type to me anymore. Last thing I sent him were some old pix of the kids, but he hasn't responded.

[Nammu]

I get my vaccine shot next Wednesday!!! I’m shocked! The state just opened the new phase that includes 45-64 yrs with one or more illness. I had thought it would take a long time, but wow. Next week! I’m hoping for the J&J but I’ll take whatever they have.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Nammu

I get my vaccine shot next Wednesday!!! I’m shocked! The state just opened the new phase that includes 45-64 yrs with one or more illness. I had thought it would take a long time, but wow. Next week! I’m hoping for the J&J but I’ll take whatever they have.

Wow! I wish that would happen here.

[Moose72]

Just waiting around until it's time to leave for the dentist. Another 20 minutes before I leave.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Nammu

I get my vaccine shot next Wednesday!!! I’m shocked! The state just opened the new phase that includes 45-64 yrs with one or more illness. I had thought it would take a long time, but wow. Next week! I’m hoping for the J&J but I’ll take whatever they have.

I'm getting mine Tuesday - Moderna.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Moose72

Just waiting around until it's time to leave for the dentist. Another 20 minutes before I leave.

Have a good dentist experience!

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by BethRags

Have a good dentist experience!

I can hope, but I'm afraid they'll get after me for not flossing enough and want to put caps on my two top front teeth (to the tune of $2k!!)- uh uh. No way. I don't even have that much anymore now that I bought the car. I hope I don't have any cavities. Last time I went, I had two. I'm not one to get a lot of cavities, so that's good.

[Soupe du jour]

Moose, congrats on the new car. It looks great!

Whatever, you are working hard to make that benzo reduction a success. Keep at it, friend! Sorry to read about that correspondence.

Nammu, I wish I could get the J&J vaccine, too. I'm no longer in the US, and the country I'm in is not ramping up on the vaccinations. I'll have to wait a while. It may even end up being a Russian version. I actually used to work for J&J. At one point even the Janssen portion of the J&J family of companies. I bet the employees are getting it first. Oh well! I guess I should have stayed working for them, but who knows how my life would have went, if I did.

[Soupe du jour]

I did very little today. Was sort of feeling unmotivated, uninspired, lazy, and that my upcoming challenges are a bit overwhelming.I mentioned that to Hubby and then said "Well, those feelings could change at the drop of a hat."

His response? "Well, Soupe, you have bipolar disorder!"

His statement was actually meant to be my psychiatrist saying that, as he knows that that is a common response from the doc.When pdoc says that I usually roll my eyes and say "OK, yea." but in reality I dislike giving bipolar disorder that much credit. Maybe he's right, but then maybe he's not always.

Hubby has been fiddling with the TV-related cords all day today. How/why it takes him so much time to do that amount of work, I don't know. At one point, he had the TV off the cable, utilizing the antenna only. Anyone remember them? Oddly, the TV stations we received were mostly all Austrian and German, in the German language. MarcusAurelius maybe would have liked that. We also managed to get BBC World News (Nice!) and an array of French stations, and ones even from as far as northern Africa. Strange! Not one Czech. We had to reconnect to cable for them. After doing so, he put on a cooking show, but without the sound on. He said, seriously, "She doesn't look that Czech." I then rolled my eyes at him. It was Rachael Ray, but when the sound was put on, dubbed in Czech.

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

I did very little today. Was sort of feeling unmotivated, uninspired, lazy, and that my upcoming challenges are a bit overwhelming.I mentioned that to Hubby and then said "Well, those feelings could change at the drop of a hat."

His response? "Well, Soupe, you have bipolar disorder!"

His statement was actually meant to be my psychiatrist saying that, as he knows that that is a common response from the doc.When pdoc says that I usually roll my eyes and say "OK, yea." but in reality I dislike giving bipolar disorder that much credit. Maybe he's right, but then maybe he's not always.

Hubby has been fiddling with the TV-related cords all day today. How/why it takes him so much time to do that amount of work, I don't know. At one point, he had the TV off the cable, utilizing the antenna only. Anyone remember them? Oddly, the TV stations we received were mostly all Austrian and German, in the German language. MarcusAurelius maybe would have liked that. We also managed to get BBC World News (Nice!) and an array of French stations, and ones even from as far as northern Africa. Strange! Not one Czech. We had to reconnect to cable for them. After doing so, he put on a cooking show, but without the sound on. He said, seriously, "She doesn't look that Czech." I then rolled my eyes at him. It was Rachael Ray, but when the sound was put on, dubbed in Czech.

....it was Rachel Ray,...