[x_BabyG_x]

I feel like I have no sense of 'self' anymore. Like I'm a different person with whoever I'm socialising with, like I'm reflecting who they are back on to them. I'm starting to wonder if this is why I see to form bonds wherever I go?

Also, I just don't know what my emotions are, I just cant distinguish from them. I'm a little jigsaw puzzle and the pieces fit together, but each piece has its own feel to it, like each one is in another dimension and it's lost. I have different me's in my head telling me different ideas and thoughts and telling me how i Should feel. I'm fragmented and I'm losing my physical body because of it. I don't know who I am, i dont know whats real and I don't feel like I exist anymore.

Sorry guys i just had to get that it I don't know what he frig is going on recently!,

[marvette]

listen, i have had a friend with bpd and everything he was I became. I dont have bpd. my point is you are not alone to us nons

[DeeLearyUs1]

I totally know the feeling. May I ask how old you are? I have menopause mixed in with UNBELEIVABLE Psychological Abuse by my Employer & Union that I've been fighting agressively for last 3 years (but harassment started like 8 yrs ago, I just didn't realize it'd NEVER end, they're THAT ruthless)! So, it's all VERY confusing, for me, and/or any therapist or diagnosis I get. But, thanks for describing one thing.. I've been told befoer that I'm like a Chameleon.. or that I immediately take on the personality and/or interests of any man I just met that I'm attracted to/dating...ffffaaarrr too fast.. LOSE MYSELF is what you called it. Me too! And I always blamed it on being a Gemini (or the youngest of 9 kids, raised by dysfunctional parents). It's making better sense now, under the 'label' of BPD (yet, I've never 'self-harmed' intentionally, cutting, etc). KNOW THAT YOU'RE NOT ALONE.

Originally Posted by x_BabyG_x

I feel like I have no sense of 'self' anymore. Like I'm a different person with whoever I'm socialising with, like I'm reflecting who they are back on to them. I'm starting to wonder if this is why I see to form bonds wherever I go?

Also, I just don't know what my emotions are, I just cant distinguish from them. I'm a little jigsaw puzzle and the pieces fit together, but each piece has its own feel to it, like each one is in another dimension and it's lost. I have different me's in my head telling me different ideas and thoughts and telling me how i Should feel. I'm fragmented and I'm losing my physical body because of it. I don't know who I am, i dont know whats real and I don't feel like I exist anymore.

Sorry guys i just had to get that it I don't know what he frig is going on recently!,

[ReddSN]

I'm sorry you feel you have lost yourself. I get that feeling too - that the real me is in here somewhere, but I get further and further away from finding her. ((hugs))

[RebbieDoll]

Ugh I can totally relate. I have no idea who I am. Which is why I always return to unhealthy behaviors--because I at least know that those things are a part of me. I wish I had any helpful advice, but I don't (or I wouldn't be this way as well). Just wanted to affirm that you are not alone, and I think this is pretty common.

[x_BabyG_x]

I'm only 23 so I'm far from the menopause yet!

I'm feeling it really bad today, I was really happy and felt stable last year, I knew exactly who I was. Now it just feels like it was all a dream. I feel very disconnected from the world today, like I'm not even in it. Rubbish.

It's just not fair how I had an identity and now it's gone just like that, no one around me understands what I'm talking about and think I'm whining over nothing. Thanks for the replies guys, I think I just needed confirmation that I even feel like this in the first place. I feel safe and like I can be 100% myself (whoever that may be! ) on these forums.

[123crazyornot]

I know the feeling. I have no clue who I am, a stranger stares back at me in the mirror and photos are like looking at a stranger. I have been like this for years now and to be honest, you kind of get used to it! It used to worry me so much it made me crazy and paranoid but I have been living with it so long that my emptiness and non identity are second nature to me now. I hope you find yourself again I truly do but I'm proof that you can survive withut an identity if you actually stop caring after a while. Not easy at first but permanent numbness definately helps. Hope you feel better soon x

You are definitively not alone. I don't have BPD... But that is me all over. But I've decided not to let it discourage me. Instead, I've decided it's going to inspire me. I have a mission again. A whole new one. Self discovery... A whole new puzzle to try to solve.