[learningtolive2013]

For the first time today I about lost it, I felt my eyes welling up and lips tremble and as soon as it hit me I stuffed it and held back the tears. I don't know why I feel ashamed to cry in front of people. I feel like if I would have just let it out then it would have been therapeutic.. Anyone else have trouble letting it out and crying in front of people?

[beloiseau]

I am the opposite! I have trouble crying when I'm by myself, but if my therapist or a friend/family member are nice and supportive or bring up a sensitive topic, I can't hold the tears back. I don't know why I'm not tearful when I'm by myself though, because that is definitely when I feel my worst. It does feel good to cry though. It makes us vulnerable and lets others help us.

[technigal]

I.cry.all.the.time. My T keeps boxes of kleenex all over her office, there are times I have had the box on my lap. Therapy is hard and it is emotional dealing with things you have not had the skills to deal with in the past. Tears are not a bad thing.

A lot of us probably heard the words "stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about". We suppress the tears because they were never validated.

Originally Posted by beloiseau

I am the opposite! I have trouble crying when I'm by myself, but if my therapist or a friend/family member are nice and supportive or bring up a sensitive topic, I can't hold the tears back. I don't know why I'm not tearful when I'm by myself though, because that is definitely when I feel my worst.

Same here.

[learningtolive2013]

Yea I think the reason I don't cry in front of anyone is because I was always shamed for doing it. I was always made to be strong and crying in my home was a sign of weakness I was called a "cry baby", made fun of and shamed for it.

[hawaii04]

I cry most every session . . . I can't seem to hold back, nor do I really wish to. It feels good, yes, 'therapeutic.' We were made to cry for a reason whether child or adult male or female. Crying in itself may not be considered a strength, yet it helps us release feelings we need to in order to be strong again. Whoever said it had to be only over scraped knees in childhood? Maybe I'm full of it and just need to make myself feel better ~ I am probably the biggest crier for my age.

[River11]

Then it's a good thing you nearly cried in front of T today! May it be just the little beginning of unashamed release for you, Learningtolive!

I used to be unable to cry in front of anyone, even not much on my own. Yes, I had been put down and even made to suffer more for crying in my past. When I saw that that was contributing to my bouts of debilitating depression I started to try to urge the crying feeling past the automatic block that would come up - I had to get past it feeling forced, and it would dry up immediately if someone touched me.

After some T and effort and time I was able to do much crying on my own (there was lots of pain and trauma and loss to recover from), and eventually was able to cry with close others when I hurt. It can be encouraging/healing to have someone feel for you and hold you when you're feeling/releasing pain...

[rabbit1234]

I have cried a lot in the 4 years of therapy I've had. I helps me to some extent....

[ScarletPimpernel]

I am a cry baby. But I hate crying in front of people.

Few sessions ago, I completely broke down crying in therapy (I found out I'm not "supposed" to see her long term). All I did was cry, look away from her (out the window/at the floor) and begged her for 15 mins to change the conversation. She finally agreed but only after she made me pinky swear to talk about it the next week. Thankfully, I was more prepared the next week (I took anxiety meds before hand!)

[greentires4me]

when I was raised my mom always said I was weak to cry in front of her or people made me feel shameful. My T asks why the tears she just is simple like that...

Originally Posted by learningtolive2013

For the first time today I about lost it, I felt my eyes welling up and lips tremble and as soon as it hit me I stuffed it and held back the tears. I don't know why I feel ashamed to cry in front of people. I feel like if I would have just let it out then it would have been therapeutic.. Anyone else have trouble letting it out and crying in front of people?

NO shame in it. Thing is, it's usually something about your upbringing that makes one feel shame for shedding tears. I'd worry more if you never cried in front of your T. Why? Because there's bound to be something that you cover in your sessions that's going to hit close to home and you'll feel pain. it would make me wonder if you were making progress if nothing made you feel that emotion.

<<<<<<<<<<< HUGE WUSSY HERE.......

Speaking as a guy - I would say I cry (at least at some point) at most of my sessions. But I am a pretty "sensitive guy" (which is embarrassing).

[technigal]

Originally Posted by Useless Me

<<<<<<<<<<< HUGE WUSSY HERE.......

Speaking as a guy - I would say I cry (at least at some point) at most of my sessions. But I am a pretty "sensitive guy" (which is embarrassing).

What is wrong with being the sensitive guy? I married a nice guy and he is pretty sensitive (especially for an aspie).

I've cried in front of many mental health 'professionals,' usually in frustration at their incompetence.

I just hate having to put so much faith and trust into these people who are being paid whether we make progress or not. It really truly irks me.

[Beyond The Pale]

I never have cried in front of my T. I shut down everything and tell her matter of fact during all of the sessions. But then again I have only been going for a few months.

Originally Posted by technigal

What is wrong with being the sensitive guy? .........

must be a generational thing.... i got beat up a lot as a kid because I was sensative. I still can not process the logic of being hit until you "stop crying". But that is how things were four bazillion years ago when I was a kid.

I have cried in front of my T especially sensitive topics and then I feel ashamed afterwards.

[technigal]

Originally Posted by Useless Me

must be a generational thing.... i got beat up a lot as a kid because I was sensative. I still can not process the logic of being hit until you "stop crying". But that is how things were four bazillion years ago when I was a kid.

I guess. I know the whole stop crying thing... I am 44 but my husband is 6 years younger then me and his experiences are what I am going on. There are lots of times I am reminded how different things are due to our ages.