[dancinglady]

How many here were in the hospital during the holidays?

[richeye]

It's no shame if someone had to. My experience is that it 'takes what it takes'.

[Crazy Hitch]

Thankfully, after what I went through in September this year, I'm in a peaceful place right now.

I acknowledge that the festive season and this time of year is so hard on many people.

I think about those who are struggling every day.

[Erti]

One year I was in the hospital during Christmas. It was stressful for my mom. She broke her phone and started crying.

[HALLIEBETH87]

I had those in the hospital on my heart all during Christmas. I got out last week and I just felt bad for those still there.

[Crazy Hitch]

I'm glad you're here Hallie ((((hugs))))

[HALLIEBETH87]

I probably could do with more help but I am too.

[HD7970GHZ]

Still on the verge of going in hospital. I may in the new year. All I know is I am super attached to my therapist now and time between sessions is getting unbearable again.

[ThunderGoddess]

I'm contemplating going back inpatient this week, i just really need my depakoat back and with no health insurance that is the quickest way to get it but alls I can think of is how sick I was from the food situation I'm a vegetarian so a lot of days I wouldn't eat at all because they would mistakenly give me meat meals and the nurses continuously forgot to reorder my food and It just feels like prison here is just not helpful other then meds there is no therapy sessions or psychiatrists just teams of doctors who see you for less than 5 minutes in the morning and medicate you then you can either watch tv or entertain yourself with books or art for days on end until they decide you can go home.

i am probably going to inpatient very soon as i am not well at all at the moment, i am having hallucinations which i had never had before and it was very scary. the sad thing is, my mother does not believe me and said 'oh come on 8888, you're not schizophrenic'. hallucinations/psychosis symptoms are a feature of severe depression jeez.

[dancinglady]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

How many here were in the hospital during the holidays?

Originally Posted by HD7970GHZ

Still on the verge of going in hospital. I may in the new year. All I know is I am super attached to my therapist now and time between sessions is getting unbearable again.

I know this feeling. I was super attached to my previous therapist. My last therapist had to violently fired me before I could move on. It was a horrible experience that took two more years to recover from.

Your therapist needs to do everything they can to help you get over this. The super attached feelings should have been taken care prior to it happening. This is their job, they know that we will get super attached because of our disorder. I know my new therapist is watching this at all costs. This is not a functional way to be in therapy with a therapist believe me when I tell you this is NOT good. I had this experience. What most do when they become OVERWHELMED and believe me they DO is to stick you in the hospital and then when you are discharged not take you back as a patient. So I know you are hoping to go into the hospital but understand that move may be the last meeting with your therapist you are super attached to. Be careful I can just tell you this from my experience. Once in the hospital their professional liability is taken over by the hospital and it is the easiest way to get rid of patients. When you get ready to get out (and maybe your experience will be different), they will refer you to someone else.

Good luck I will be thinking about you and your struggles.

[HD7970GHZ]

The thought of losing my therapist if I go inpatient is just unbearable... I will have to ask her about this next time I meet with her. I want to make sure this doesn't happen if I have to go inpatient.

In 2012, I spent Thanksgiving week in the hospital and the rest of that year on leave from work. It was my 4th admission in less than a decade and probably my lowest point (even lower than the two times I was admitted for overdosing). I think it did more for me than years of therapy--I say that rather tongue-in-cheek, and I hope it doesn't sound insensitive. I just hope I never spend another minute in the hospital, and the memory of that lonely season is sometimes what keeps me from going over the edge, even when I am in one of my downward spirals.

I hope everyone who had a rough season is doing better now, or at least is on the upswing.

Originally Posted by ThunderGoddess

I'm contemplating going back inpatient this week, i just really need my depakoat back and with no health insurance that is the quickest way to get it but alls I can think of is how sick I was from the food situation I'm a vegetarian so a lot of days I wouldn't eat at all because they would mistakenly give me meat meals and the nurses continuously forgot to reorder my food and It just feels like prison here is just not helpful other then meds there is no therapy sessions or psychiatrists just teams of doctors who see you for less than 5 minutes in the morning and medicate you then you can either watch tv or entertain yourself with books or art for days on end until they decide you can go home.

I'm a vegetarian as well and got meat every single day I was inpatient, except for the last two, so I ate a lot of cereal and bananas. And I brought it up to the staff every single day I was there. I also had a doctor's order for coffee at breakfast (because we weren't allowed caffeine (lol) but I worked third shift at the time and pretty much mainlined caffeine, so going cold turkey in addition to being in a mental crisis, my pdoc felt, was not in my (or the staff's) best interests. Guess what? I didn't get the coffee that was ordered by the physician. That put me over the edge. By the third day of that, I flew into a blind rage and refused to come out of my room--I don't recommend doing this to solve a problem. I think what made me so angry was not the oversight, but the fact that all the staff had to do was go up to the main kitchen to get the coffee, but they refused i.e. were too lazy to walk to the other hall to do so. And, like your situation, they could have reordered my meals, but that would have meant that I would have been late for my morning therapy--we had to go to all-day classes, we couldn't do art or TV or anything until the end of the day--and they really didn't want to anyway. It's disheartening.

[HD7970GHZ]

I may admit myself tomorrow.

[Crazy Hitch]

Originally Posted by HD7970GHZ

I may admit myself tomorrow.

Keep tabs with us HD.

We're all thinking of you.

[intheburbs3134]

I made it through without an admission but I want to go during January to a place that is one step down from hospital. Usually people stay for 2 weeks. Both times I have been there they have only let me stay a week. I have no idea why they turf me out after 1 week yet let others stay the full time. I will see how the interview goes and if they say they are going to review me after a weeks which usually means they are going to kick me out I will try elsewhere.

[dancinglady]

I used to have that problem. They do not believe it is best to keep us in any type of hospitalization or day support for too long. They say we regress too much.

[HD7970GHZ]

Was inpatient for 5 days. Helped a lot to stabilize. Got out and that day had a terrible session with my therapist. I said some really mean things. Though - they were honest. I am not happy with how she was doing therapy and I let it all out.

I went home and contemplated suicide again. Almost brought myself to emerg today. Had a big fight with my mom today, two calls with my therapist - asking for forgiveness. She forgave me.

On the verge of going inpatient again. Its just not a good time right now but I will fight to stay alive because you all rock and we need eachother.

[The_little_didgee]

Years ago I spent a Christmas in the hospital. It wasn't too bad. The staff tried to cheer us up and even gave us gifts. I stayed there for nearly four weeks.

It has been years since my last hospitalization. I always seem to avoid it even when I need it. Last winter I should have gone but I lied about my symptoms.

[Overwhelmed15]

I'm admitting myself Monday ....it's my 1st time duno what to expect ....hope someone would tell me

[lynn808]

I don't think I need to be right now. I am still functioning, but severely depressed, not eating right, doing bad things, having bad thoughts really need to get a new P and t.
mine have gone away...instead of seeing a P is see some rpn or something. feel like a number there now, and have to travel an hour to be ignored. don't trust to talk
to her. the only way to see P now is to go inpatient again. I have much distrust because I have gone in many times in the past 30 years. Sometimes I know more than the person in charge. actually I need to change hospitals....hmmmmm thanks....will do research