[TryingToMoveForward]

Originally Posted by Seraphine

Maybe that's what you need to do, start saying "well your behavior affects me this way, and you are acting like a hypocrite for ignoring your own behavior while being so keen to point out mine". It might help bring back some respect and improve your own boundaries with them?

I never thought of doing that, but if I need to I will definitely say it! I'm just really non-confrontational. And timid. Meek. Shy. Overly sensitive. Its difficult for me, with my history of abuse, to stand up for myself. But I really like this so I will definitely try.

[Seraphine]

Don't worry, confrontation is really difficult for me too. I find myself having to rehearse and psych myself up for it when it's needed.
Once I told a kid at my daughters bus stop that I'd appreciate I'd he didn't step on her bag because her lunch was in there, and physically felt as though I'd picked a fight with someone!

[Seraphine]

I have a gripe I haven't told anyone else. I even have to self censor in my what if diary because my bf read it once that I know of. It sucks.

[TryingToMoveForward]

Yeah? You can't share it here?

I'm pissed because I had a thread somewhere else on this site, and this person is being contrary to everything I'm saying and I'm like WTH? They said I can't expect everyone to be as sensitive as me. And I never asked that. At all. I ask for other people, regardless of their sensitivity and personality, to be conscientious and considerate of people who are more sensitive than most. I mean, you're supposed to tailor your approach to people, how you interact with them, according to these elements. So you can't treat a very sensitive person as if they aren't a very sensitive person. Nor can you be degrading to their sensitivity. I'm being given the nine yards just for a decision I posted regarding two friends. I'm going to have to be cautious about what I say on here I guess. Since its a support forum, I didn't think people would attack you.

[BadWolfC]

Originally Posted by TryingToMoveForward

Yeah? You can't share it here?

I'm pissed because I had a thread somewhere else on this site, and this person is being contrary to everything I'm saying and I'm like WTH? They said I can't expect everyone to be as sensitive as me. And I never asked that. At all. I ask for other people, regardless of their sensitivity and personality, to be conscientious and considerate of people who are more sensitive than most. I mean, you're supposed to tailor your approach to people, how you interact with them, according to these elements. So you can't treat a very sensitive person as if they aren't a very sensitive person. Nor can you be degrading to their sensitivity. I'm being given the nine yards just for a decision I posted regarding two friends. I'm going to have to be cautious about what I say on here I guess. Since its a support forum, I didn't think people would attack you.

I can definitely relate to that... I think that's why I find it hard to post sometimes. I haven't been attacked on here, but I have a fear of it because it happens to me everywhere else. I'm sorry you had that experience on here, you're absolutely right that you shouldn't expect to be attacked on a support forum.

[TryingToMoveForward]

Originally Posted by BadWolfC

I can definitely relate to that... I think that's why I find it hard to post sometimes. I haven't been attacked on here, but I have a fear of it because it happens to me everywhere else. I'm sorry you had that experience on here, you're absolutely right that you shouldn't expect to be attacked on a support forum.

I might have been taking it too personally and reacted in an overly sensitive manner. Its tiring though, when you have little confidence, you deliberate for a long time, make a tough decision and go with it...and someone questions you, and derails your confidence, makes you second guess yourself and suddenly you feel like you screwed up and made a mistake. When all you really wanted was a little validation.

[TryingToMoveForward]

I just remembered something my therapist said after diagnosing me as histrionic. Something like at least I'm not borderline, borderline clients are the worst to treat and they never want to get that phone call telling them they have a client with BPD. She made it sound like its a nightmare to work with them. Like she would rather give them off to another therapist at the clinic.

Stigma.

[Unrigged64072835]

I don't know if I can use the same ER I used to now that the crisis workers know I have BPD. I mean, what if I have a bipolar depression and seek treatment? Are they going to tell me I'm not doing it right and come back when I'm dead? I mean, I had a crisis worker tell me that I needed to try something different when I told her about my SI. Thanks, lady, I really needed to know that. I'd go to a different ER, but this one usually gets me into the hospitals that work best for me.