[Can't Stop Crying]

I feel like such a waste of space - inhabiting a zone on this earth that belongs to someone so much more deserving. So many times I've felt so low and thought this can't possibly get any worse, but it always manages to find a way to find a new depth.

My T says I need to learn to love/accept myself. Love what - a miserable basket case that always fails at simple tasks?!?!

[disguise123]

oh u are not!!! (((((warm hugs)))))
But im sorry your feeling this way.
I feel like that alot too.
Start small, and really really try, whats one thing that u are good at? Or one thing that is good about u? One quality that u possess that you would admire if you saw it in others?

[hoping4best]

No one is totally crap and so u too are not i felt low and had suicidal thoughts when i had depression. I hope ur T is able to help and guide u through it

[ladyjrnlist]

Awwww. You are not a waste of space. Nobody is. You are here for a reason and you will find that reason. Hang in there. Things will get better, I promise.

[Leed]

You've got to remember that God doesn't make "crap" ~ God makes perfect beings ~ perhaps we have some problems -- so what??? We just need some help in dealing with them, that's all. I have been in and out of therapy all my adult life. I've been depressed since I was a child. But that was all environmental -- God didn't MAKE me that way.

I'm sure it's the same with you. You just need some help in dealing with things.

And yes, you DO need to learn to love yourself. Most people who have our kinds of problems are very loving, kind, considerate people. You can LOVE yourself for THAT !!! Look in the mirror - tell yourself that you love yourself. Look in that persons' eyes and SEE the good person in there. You ARE worthy of loving. You ARE a good person. You ARE kind and considerate! TELL that person in the mirror several times until you believe it! You will NOT fail at this.

God bless you (and He will) (((Hugs))) Lee

[Umbral_Seraph]

I frequently have the same feelings. I'm very much a perfectionist, so it's easy for me to find fault with everything I do. I'm the only one who finds (that much) fault with me; just keep moving forward, one foot in front of the other...

[Tash35]

awwww-no, no you are not at all a waste of space. Reading that made me sad and I really want to give you a big hug because that breaks my heart. I wish I was there right now, I don't know who you are but I can feel your pain...it feels horrible to feel that way...You are so worth every breath on this planet, this planet loves you, this universe loves you-

Reading that also made me reflect on myself...because, I as well, say that. I say horrible things like that about myself, like I am defective, or a waste of time and space...I feel this way and sometimes say it to the people I love and who love me, and it must break their heart to hear that too.

So, my darling, precious one, how can you be a waste of space when you helped me to reflect and see how damaging that is to say that? Who says you are a failure? Only yourself...

I have failed at a lot of things, I know what you are saying, but you are not a failure. Life is hard. Sometimes people have easier times at it...some people don't, but you get up and face each day and you want to change and learn and grow...and that is STRENGTH-you hear me??? You are pure strength and goodness and one day you will accept yourself. This, however, comes with forgiving yourself. I just learned that...actually in the process still...it is a daily thing for me too, we have to work at it.
Forgive yourself for your mistakes, and the weight will come off. I promise.

You are a star. You are worth everyone's words and hugs. You are worth forgiveness. and you are worth loving.

((((can't stop crying)))).

[clouds_and_sun]

Originally Posted by Can't Stop Crying

I feel like such a waste of space - inhabiting a zone on this earth that belongs to someone so much more deserving.

I know the feeling my friend, I think the exact same thing you have mentioned about myself so many times throughout the day. I can say that you are def. not a waste of space

[sarek]

I wish you would stop saying that about yourself. Be careful using such words because they create a negative feedback loop in your mind and only reinforce your own thoughts.
It may not seem to you like it will help much but you should still actively try to intercept thoughts like these and cut them short. Do not let them continue.

And please take a look at my sig. That applies to you too.

[madisgram]

i like the feedback your T gave you and glad you shared it with us. it takes time to learn how to love yourself. it doesn't happen overnight just like your not caring yourself happened. just take it a day at a time. when you were young did you think you were of value? if so try to "look" at that little girl-you-and recall those warm, happy times. sometimes that allows ourselves to get in touch with those positive feelings of self worth.

[Can't Stop Crying]

I have very few memories from before the abuse. I think my personality and character were still being formed so I don't really know what I was destined to be. I don't ever remember feeling valued or even wanted (except maybe now, I know my boys want me to stick around - I try to remind myself of that daily)

I guess the worst part of everything is that I don't feel like the abuse just impacted me, I feel like it defined me.

[Tash35]

Originally Posted by sarek

I wish you would stop saying that about yourself. Be careful using such words because they create a negative feedback loop in your mind and only reinforce your own thoughts.
It may not seem to you like it will help much but you should still actively try to intercept thoughts like these and cut them short. Do not let them continue.

And please take a look at my sig. That applies to you too.

Hi Sarek-thank you so much for this, I know it wasn't for me but I liked it when I read it)... it is so true, when we ruminate in negative thoughts they become reinforcing. I had to really work on this too-I am now so careful what i tell myself. Thanks for your sig.