[Ones44]

I am posting this prior to going to a funeral... I know that I don't react well to funerals. Meaning I never feel sad or sorrowful or any other typical funeral feeling... I just go entirely numb. And after the funeral, I hate myself for being so numb and then I feel extremely guilty... funeral starts at 6:30(East Coast)... I always have a hard time coping with the fact that I really don't seem to care if the person is dead.

[Leed]

If the deceased on is a CLOSE family member, then i would be worried about feeling so terribly numb. But if this is a distant relative that you don't really know well, I don't think I'd worry about it too well -- although I think I would care "somewhat' that the person is dead -- unless they are in their 80's or something, and they've lived a good, long life.

I think it WOULD be a good idea to see a therapist about this numbness over death. This just isn't normal. Most people feel SOMETHING at a funeral, even if it's a distant relative or acquaintance. They don't just sit there with absolutely NO emotion whatsoever! So please seek out help from a therapist. I really think you should

God bless and please take care. Hugs, Lee

As ever Leed has given good advice. Sometimes numbness can be caused by shock and disbelief - everyone reacts differently to grief, theres no standard for how you should feel. I would definately research some grief counselling so that you can come to terms with your feelings in a way thats healthy and supportive. Im sorry to hear of your loss and i hope you continue to find this place comforting and supportive - check out the grief and loss board, talking to others who have experienced similar reactions may be helpful. All the best.

[Ones44]

Originally Posted by bb2023

As ever Leed has given good advice. Sometimes numbness can be caused by shock and disbelief - everyone reacts differently to grief, theres no standard for how you should feel. I would definately research some grief counselling so that you can come to terms with your feelings in a way thats healthy and supportive. Im sorry to hear of your loss and i hope you continue to find this place comforting and supportive - check out the grief and loss board, talking to others who have experienced similar reactions may be helpful. All the best.

Yep, Leed always has good advice. Well, I the funeral is over now... and I felt absolutely nothing... although, I swear I saw the corpse breathing or something... anyways... in this case, the relative was quite distant. She was the grandmother of a very distant cousin of mine(although I basically grew up with him and you can see the family resemblance.)

What really worried me was when my grandfather died, three years ago(maybe). When I heard he died, I rolled over and went back to sleep. Never grieved. I have never grieved for anyone who was dead. And I feel guilty for it. I have grieved for people who are still alive when I run scenarios of them dying... but in the end, if they die I don't grieve...

[Big Mama]

I am sorry to hear about your awkwardness at funerals. The lack of emotion is not a good feeling. I have lost grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends, pets, I have showed no emotion and felt no emotion. It's weird to see people and see there grief. Espicially since I have none. I never have. Even if the person is close to me. I know I should be sad or angry or something. Numb is not what you should be but it is what I am. I to feel guilty because of that. I can not offer you any advice for I have none. I react the same as you do. I can only hope that having someone who behaves the same way brings you some piece of mind knowing you are not alone. Good luck w/ this.