Feeling left behind.

I have a chronic pain issue but am tired of discussing it, instead I want to say to no one in particular that I have devoted so much time and emotion to my ex girlfriend. She is an alcoholic. Doing pretty good off the booze now. I have been the only constant in her life for quite a long time now.
I have many issues of my own but put important things aside in order to help her and am not getting much out of it in return. Now that she seems to be much better she has no use for me and am alone in this friggin apartment all the time. I make efforts to talk to her on face book or call her up with no reply, until it comes time when no one is there for her.
She knows how to pull my strings and seems to have me wrapped around her... well any way when she needs something she will call me up and expect me to jump. If I don't she gets angry. I am trying to hang on to a relationship that is going nowhere, I know it and at the same time trying to be strong and be done with all of it.
As soon as the phone rings I throw all the hard work of saying no to her and grab the phone. I am a pretty smart guy but when it comes to love and my ex, I have no control. I can throw every thing out the window with just the sound of her voice, like a spell or curse I can not get away from my heart.
I spend so much time thinking about this that I am not getting real issues taken care of. I think I just wrote this to see it in writing with a hope that maybe telling you I may help me move on. we'll see if telling strangers about the issue can help make me stronger. Thanks for listening.

PS. I really like this website, I have been looking for a place to find all the issues in one place. All of you are wonderful, so many story's, not feeling quite so lonely any more.

Wordlessdevotion

You can find the strength to break the emotional habit and find new ones. And new opportunities. Sorry you got treated badly.

Alanon helps some--have you tried meeting with them? they might have some tips
I'm an alcoholic, and we use people ... Pushing their buttons

Give here space for now. It really does take a year after someone has quit drinking for them to become functionally sober, And that means knowing how to relate socially with love ones without automatically manipulating them. In the meantime try to take care of yourself as best you can. Give yourself some tender loving care.
Check on her once in a while, but don't dote. Replenish your life, and welcome to PsychCentral!
Roadie

Well, bless your heart. After you go thru all that with her, and see her get sober, and what does she do?? Boy, she's a real stinker isn't she!!!

And you're a chronic painer besides!! That just puts the icing on the cake, as far as I'm concerned. What on earth does she expect -- blood? You've been her knight in shining armor!! You've seen her at her worst and STILL love her!! You've helped her thru some very trying times -- and YOU have some pretty serious issues yourself, and YOU could use some attention! But does she give it to you? NOOOOOO.

My dear friend, find someone else. Let this bimbo go. I'm sure she's been having a fling or two anyway, from the sounds of things. I mean, think about it. You can't get ahold of her often, can you! She's not home, right?

You're the kind of guy that MOST women would love to have -- a guy that's kind and understanding, and who sticks by a woman! Why OH why are you wasting your time on her when you COULD be with someone who would give BACK the love and caring that you give only TENFOLD! This one isn't good enough for you. You deserve MUCH better than she is. Please -- tell her to go fly a kite and look for someone else. I have a feeling you won't have to look long or far.

God bless, and please take care. I hope your pain isn't too unbearable. I'm a chronic painer too, and know what it's like. Best of luck! Hugs, Lee

Hey, wow, I don't know How to thank you. Such kindness and understanding. I will post more of this crazy stuff. I have a lot to tell. would be nice to just get it out there. I have so many problems with Dr. and dealing with my issues with out reall fighting hard. But being nice at the same time is a real test.

I get you, man thanks for listening, I have more. watch out for more. cant sit here long.

I second going to Al Anon. Even in my small town there is at least one meeting a day. In bigger cities there are several a day. In other words you can go as much as you need. It's wonderful being around people who can really relate. They hand out a phone list so you can talk to other members when you need to. I say go and check it out and see if it's for you. You need the support of people who are/have been where you are now. Good Luck.