I am going to have therapy soon but i almost feel like it is hopeless now because i am so mediocre. i have become a 34 year old male and i pretty much suck at everything and nobody likes me lol. That's just the state of play right now.

At this age i feel that i need things to change quickly because the man i am now will be the man i am for the rest of my life, and at the moment i am not happy with the man i am.

i feel i may be mentally retarded or something, or at least a learning disability. Also i am not terribly attractive. I also suck at sports. I am not funny either. And i do want a partner but i have no sex drive at the moment so i am not terribly motivated to find a woman.

this is just how i feel now, and my life is getting worse all the time.

I won't say exactly how i feel but you know.

anyway i will be in therapy soon and it will be intensive, that's really the only hope i have right now, even though i said earlier it was hopeless.

and maybe i need to change my antidepressants

(((((((((((((((IT))))))))))))))) YOU? "Mediocre"??? My goodness, if you (owner of Oscar the wall walking spider that you used to take for walks) are "mediocre"....well....

that'd make me.........."Interesting"? No Way!
You have provided so much laughter, and interest here on this site....nah...not "mediocre".

You be a wonderfully interesting, intelligent, fun person.

And, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the laughter you have brought to my days and nights on this site......and all the thought provoking, "out there" threads you have authored! Scratched my head many a time figuring what you were getting at...and that's good! My head needs a good scratching to get it to Think!

my my my.....you? "Mediocre"?....nah..nope! You will get through this time...and give us all more to ponder, and insight into ourselves with your quirky threads...such brain ticklers you give us all!!! And Funeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! You be!!!! Yes indeed.

And....I LIKE YOU!!!!! (who am I...but....a popcorn eating....itchy head....but still, I really do like you, if that counts for anything?)

With all sincerity,
Virago

[avlady]

you should listen to Virago, I don't know you too well except through here but she sounds like she knows you pretty well!!

[winter4me]

I also think you should take Virago seriously.
And, believe it or not, you are still young. I hope therapy is good! Make sure you tell the t. all you have told us and more------------and that said t. is one that "fits" your needs----------
Hang in there, the sun is still rising.

[EBD8]

I was never any good at being patient with myself. I always wanted things yesterday. And a change in medication did pull me out of a 8 month depression. Since I'm bipolar I didn't know how to deal with it lasting that long and things had dramatically changed for the better that's what I couldn't accept. Not going to say how I got there, but I was fortunate. You never know what will start the healing process but I hope posting here might get the ball rolling. good luck

[Rusty9]

Could be that taking antidepressants is part of the problem. Another may be you have problems concentrating, focusing, paying attention, staying with anything. Tell me if I'm right. If so you can start work on it right now. Try to count every breath you take, all day long. As soon as notice you lose track, start again. Over and over and over. Tell ,me how it goes. I do it. I am very happy.

[Thunder Bow]

"illegal tolet"...Ask your Therapist about "Virgo". Also ask to see if "Avatar" is right for you!

Thanks all for your responses . . .

I recently read a blog about sexual objectification, and I think this is what I am doing. I am judging myself based on how I think women would see me from the outside, rather than as I actually am . . .

At least I think this is it.

I feel better now anyway.

Originally Posted by Illegal Toilet

I am going to have therapy soon but i almost feel like it is hopeless now because i am so mediocre. i have become a 34 year old male and i pretty much suck at everything and nobody likes me lol. That's just the state of play right now.

At this age i feel that i need things to change quickly because the man i am now will be the man i am for the rest of my life, and at the moment i am not happy with the man i am.

i feel i may be mentally retarded or something, or at least a learning disability. Also i am not terribly attractive. I also suck at sports. I am not funny either. And i do want a partner but i have no sex drive at the moment so i am not terribly motivated to find a woman.

this is just how i feel now, and my life is getting worse all the time.

I won't say exactly how i feel but you know.

anyway i will be in therapy soon and it will be intensive, that's really the only hope i have right now, even though i said earlier it was hopeless.

and maybe i need to change my antidepressants

You sound just like me. i suck at sports, i can't crack jokes, i don't have a girlfriend, i'm not one of those macho guys that give off a sexual vibe around girls, and i hate being taken advantage of. i'm a lot younger than you are, and you seem to get more attention than i do. i have to demand it sometimes. it's as if the world hates me.

[eskielover]

The best part is that you do want to make the changes that will improve your life.....that is one of the most valuable traits that will get the necessary changed to be made. I was married to a guy who had serious personality issues & had no desire to change......his comment when I left him after 33 years of marriage was that he thought I would just keep tolerating him....even though those issues had been bothering me for all 33 of those years. The desire to fix the things that aren't working in your life is very commendable