Temper and Impulsiveness

Hello everyone, I tend to have thoughts and get fustrated when i don't get what I want. I have temper issues and take things too personally and take things that wrong way. I get impulsive I guess?

Anyways, has anyone else experienced these feelings, thought, emotions?

Hi, Dog on a Tree. Yes, it is my opinion that everyone gets a version of the frustrated-when-don't-get-one's-way. I think though that it is a learning experience. Two year old's have temper tantrums, sort of what you are complaining about? The trick for me has been to watch and notice and then focus on the frustration instead of whatever I'm not getting.

Nothing "outside" ourselves is very useful to us so taking things personally, that the outside and what other people are saying and doing is about us instead of them and allowing it to affect us negatively, doesn't make sense in the larger scheme of things. We cannot control other people so trying to make them say, do, think, etc. something instead of changing our own thinking and actions ultimately won't work and will be even more frustrating for us.

We are responsible for identifying and getting what we want so we have to go out and meet people rather than insist people come to us, we have to be aware of what our goal is, what we want and going after it. If we want a clean kitchen, for example, we have to take the garbage out, expecting someone else to do that or getting frustrated that we ask and they say they will but don't, when it may not be what they want, will just leave us feeling upset and frustrated? It is not a contest or will struggle; we try to choose friends that want us to be happy and want to be with us and enjoy us, etc. But how we do things is not necessarily how others want or do things, there is no "right" way to live and people who want to be slobs, for example, don't care if the garbage gets taken out, expecting them to care or want what we want and getting upset when they don't, that does not help make us feel good? If feeling good for me is an empty garbage can, I'm going to take out the garbage!

Hey buddy I think everyone does. I guess the difference being how you act on it? That being said I definitely get that way esp when threatened (someone puts me down). My emotions take control easier than what others would like. But that's just the thing I don't mind blowing off steam on front of everyone if it means I'm mentally healthy in the long run. They may get embarrassed or w/e but it's not their well-being that is in jeopardy. So I guess the true friends stick and the others don't. As long as you're just protecting yourself then just be you imo.

Thank you both for your inputs it's something I will overcome. Takes time but I will get there

I don't have that too much but have family members who do. I don't know if you have the kind of temper where rage becomes the only feeling you're aware of and your "thinking brain" shuts down. My sister told me that asking herself "what do I want to get out of this?" was somewhat helpful when she was involved in an interaction where her impulse was to let her anger take over.

I ask myself that for my "lesser" anger impulses, too. If what you really want is for the person to do something for you, cooperate with you, or to just not call the police, sometimes that thought can help.

There are, of course, anger management courses available. It probably would be good for most of us to take one. Anger is a good emotion when managed correctly but potentially dangerous and destructive when it gets out of control.