[mulan]

Year after year after year I was always the one anybody wanted. Not only in college. In high school I was always the last one to be chosen in PE and whenever we had to divide into pares I would end up alone and I would have to join two other people making a three people group.

In high school my table partner would leave if someone else who she was friend with got to be alone in their table.

I could be used to it by now, but I am not. Because it's really hard. And it's not only being the one nobody wants, the worst is my colleagues choosing people they don't know or never talked with over me. It really makes me feel unwanted. There's a lot of tiny details in the way my colleagues choose who they want to be with that make me feel unwanted. Like three diferent groups missing a person asking the same girl to be with them, and after she made her choice the other two opting to stay with one element less...when I still had no group. Or this guy asking me if I already had a group, me writing him back and he not answearing me anymore because in the meantime was asked by other colleagues to join them(one of the group which was missing a person, and even they had a spot left he didn't mention me or cared about me being alone). It's like anything is better than beying with me.

Of course if nobody wants me around it must be my fault, but even so it hurts every time. Thankfully the today group formation is the last one I had to endure as a student...

[Thunder Bow]

It is Not your fault. It is the fault of those who did not choose you. They are short sighted and place people in piegon holes, as set by their culture.

[mulan]

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

It is Not your fault. It is the fault of those who did not choose you. They are short sighted and place people in piegon holes, as set by their culture.

Thank you, but that's not really accurated. It is indeed my fault...I don't want to explain it's complicated, it's not about what I do, it's about what I don't do.
I get the feeling that those people don't really know me, but I don't let them know me.

I only blame myself, and I am aware about the way I behave. But the problem is that I can't change, not only by myself, I tried over and over and it didn't work.

And it's because I blame myself that it hurts even more. There's no way people will ever like me.

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by mulan

Thank you, but that's not really accurated. It is indeed my fault...I don't want to explain it's complicated, it's not about what I do, it's about what I don't do.
I get the feeling that those people don't really know me, but I don't let them know me.

I only blame myself, and I am aware about the way I behave. But the problem is that I can't change, not only by myself, I tried over and over and it didn't work.

And it's because I blame myself that it hurts even more. There's no way people will ever like me.

Hi, did you say you're currently in therapy? If not, it might really help you. I used to be the one no one ever picked too, at school.

[LittleEarthquakes]

I was always picked last in school because I never talked to anyone. In college that's changed a bit, I can find someone to be in a group with, but I still can't make friends like I see other people doing.

[CapedCrusader]

Two roads diverged in wood, and i-
I took the less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

U R NOT ALONE MY FRIEND.

[psyco123]

hi, mulan

frist of all i would say that we all have come across such kind of childhood. where we thought we are not liked by others.

never blame urself, i n this way u are getting hard upon urself and sabotaging urself..

try to emphasis on ur good qualities.
if people dont talk to ..then u make the first move..u talk to them..andwait for the response
try to be more in public..try to interact with people from different sphere..
slowly and gradually u ll have to remove ur social anxiety..
just remember god accepts and loves u as u r.
try to be part of some clubs or other team...
create new hobby or develop the skills which u like in urself
introduce urself to others..
be pleasant to others..
Your beauty lies in ur simplicity.
u r always wanted by someone

[psyco123]

hi,



for u