battle cant do this anymore

poss trigger (have just had enough i dont want to die but i dont want to live either ! i have a constant thought that i cant cope anymore i dont want to cope anymore , i try so hard to be positive but it has gone on too long and i am so tired the depression and bpd were enough but add bereavment and alcohol dependance to the mix and its hell i just dont know what to do with myself !!! i am sick of feeling so crap i am sick of causing worry to my family i am sick of not coping and pretending all is well i think i lied about wanting to die , i am just a bloody coward, sorry i am rambling and probably saying stuff i shouldnt , i will shut up now . somebody please tell me how i can face the future when i have this inner self dwstuct that wont go away and my emotions are in a state of turmoil.)

It sounds like you are really living in a handful of challenges that are biting you from all sides. It sounds like getting these under control is going to take a good team to help deal with these afflictions. Going it alone is like trying to wrestle a pair of alligators without any help. What therapeutic options you choose can make a big difference in how you feel over time.

I guess when you face what seems like unbeatable odds, there is a state of mind some people get into where they no longer worry about trying to overcome, just trying to live as best as possible. Taking each day as a victory when getting through the day.

Psych Central has been a place to meet people and deal with the challenges. There is a joy in sharing what I am going through and knowing people understand and accept me for who I am.

i hope you feel better, this is a good place to vent too. i hope you do get help from a doc and t too. good luck

(((((((( moodycow )))))))))

Now post a laundry list that has some good things about yourself. I think you will start to feel better if you do.

thank you guys. Thunder bow what is a laundry list ?

You might call it a list of bad feelings you have about yourself, as in dirty laundry. Now I want you to post a list of good feelings you have about yourself.

Go to a meeting...call your sponsor NOW.

Sounds like you do need medications for depression as well.

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good things about me......... may need more thinking time for this |

I see many good things about you here online. If I can see this on a computer, think what you can see in yourself, from within. It should be easy.

Thank you thunder bow ) i thought of one today i am always kind to all animals .