Breaking stereotypes when it comes to men conveying emotions.

I think one can be very confident and emotional at the same time. I don't think one excludes the other. I am very confident yet I have no fear of being emotional. My fiancée is a very emotional and sensitive and have no fears of showing it, yet he is very successful and confident.

There are people of all sorts out there. Overall generalizations and stereotypes are just too primitive and naive in my opinion. They are very limiting, life is more complex than that.

Some of it is also cultural, in some cultures men are supposed to be tougher on outside etc it is ok to have personal preferences though.

If one dislikes certain type of men or women they are welcome to make their choice. But I really don't understand stereotyping. It's very limiting and not based on reality . The world is moving on and progressing and changing

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We are all animals, we are humans.
I believe men & woman all have an emotional portfolio.

Communication is key to understanding another, being a good listener, and sometimes people just don't understand that for some woman/cry need to cry/talk and be comforted by a hug. An embrace releasing negative emotions of sadness & suffering goes a long way. Its also about energy finding the right person to share with.

The one thing a guy/girl hates to see their other cry, ... They were never taught how to fix tears.

One of many things a woman/man hate to see their partner getting upset when trying to communicate...

The evolution of emotions/feelings and the ability to share in a non /defensive way or non confrontational way, we are far more familiar to the baseline raw emotions (energy) than what we really need as individuals.
Before entering into a relationship get to know a person.

If you want to distort it in that way you are free to do that. Though of course that is how you *feel*, you're a woman. That's all woman do is feel. If going by stereotypes.

Though yes it does enter in here because that is the stereotype of a woman.

Along with the idea that you moan a lot. If anything you aren't attracted to women.

I understand what you mean though about no respect for them. Though our culture is quite backwards and tells us to have respect for women when they act the same way as the men who you deem weak.

To be a woman is to be a weak man.

Why give women respect at all?

You don't have to. The only person I want respect from is my husband, and I have that. I respect him as well. That's where my influence begins and ends. You have the same influence or choices. If you wish to attract a woman, you have to respect one.

If you don't want a woman in your life, then you don't have to respect any of them.

I'm sorry, are you saying that staying at home "popping out babies" is weak?

As a male I am interested in the actual idea behind this thread, and if I can be so bold as to offer my two cents on it, this "sterotypical strong, emotions-bottled-up man" being the attractive man to women mostly is true, in my experience.

I would not classify myself as being outwardly emotional 85% of the time. I keep a hell of a lot to myself, I don't have a "great" support group if things go bad for me, and by nature I am a very keep-things-to-myself person. I don't talk about really personal things with people that often, at least not MY personal issues. I have always tended to keep things to myself. But, when I do express emotion outwardly that other 15% of the time, I am as brutally honest as they come. And in my experience, that brutal rawness of emotion has driven away girls countless times. It takes a lot for me to open up to someone and be totally myself with someone, and if I get to that level of trust I DO bare my emotions/feelings more than typically. It's a comfort thing, really. I have to feel comfortable, like I won't be judged for being a bit more expressive than normal.

Now understand that I am much more mature for my age (17) than anyone I've ever met of my age group - people meet me and assume I'm in my 20's and I've had life experiences that some 40+ year-olds haven't had, I'm much more serious and rational than people who I go to school with for example. Hell, my last relationship (which just recently ended) was with a girl 6.5 years older than me (23, nearly 24). She is the only girl I've ever felt 100% comfortable being myself around, and is the only girl I've ever been involved with that I can say I actually love. I've been heartbroken over her for a month now and I've cried and experienced emotions I rarely ever have before, and I've been more expressive of those sad emotions than EVER before in my life. And from my experience, when I as a male express such raw or intense emotion (like my devastation at losing that girl, for example), it shocks people, they aren't accustomed to it and they don't know how to react to it. Even the girl I was with was sometimes surprised by how much emotion I'd display around her. She just wasn't used to it.

Hope that whole thing makes sense lol... point I'm trying to make here is that I agree that men are held to a higher standard in displaying emotion, we aren't traditionally expected to be as expressive as women, it's a social norm transferred across centuries. But men have feelings as strongly or STRONGER than women do sometimes, and if you see us display it openly and honestly, it means we are totally comfortable around you and are secretly praying you won't judge us for showing it. Every guy I know believes this sentiment. If we are emotionally open with you, 100%, you'd damn sure not be turned off by it (barring the occasional guy who takes everything to an extreme of course), because it takes a lot for us to do that as a collective societal group. Every person is different, but the fact of the matter is that we all have the same emotions and we all experience them at some point, and men have been taught by society/popular culture that it is unacceptable to express feelings to others aside from a select few. And in my opinion, that just creates a bunch of arrogant asshole guys that don't know how to properly respond to and evaluate their emotions, because they have learned to push them aside and can't properly express their feelings to anyone else.

Again, just my thoughts on this matter, I'm sure someone is going to disagree with me lol. We tackled this topic quite a bit in my college Sociology and Psychology classes, and I made much the same arguments in our weekly seminars.

Personally, I don't want us all to be the same.

jmo.

And luckily we aren't all the same! It's a Beauty of life!

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