I have been less than 3 months on these forums, and I have made many posts and threads relative to this short period. This reflects the fact that I have had no life other than being here. I have spent most of my time on these forums. I have expressed my feelings very plainly. I have told many personal things that I would never share with anyone I know in person. In retrospect, I think I should have kept everything to myself. To be in pain alone with no one knowing. Who cares if I am not living my life? No one. No one can help me, and I felt worse after posting. I am weak to keep my feelings to myself, but posting makes things worse. I read some (explicit and implicit) accusations through others' posts and "Thanks" to others. Call me crazy, it is OK. I am crazy and stupid and naive and don't deserve to be listened to. Sorry to waste everyone's time on my posts. I don't know why you read them to be honest. I am disgusted by myself and by my life and my personality. Please don't comment on this thread. Thanks

[Open Eyes]

(((Mr. Stranger))), I am very sorry you have been triggered and you feel this way. I would like to help you and you can PM me and direct me to these posts that have led to your feeling this way so I can help you overcome the way you feel right now. I have been triggered myself and have gone through feeling like you have described. I was so GRATEFUL for the members that PM'd me with support that helped me regain myself and grow verses run away and suffer alone.

Is this because of what I said in your "Change" thread on mental health? I'm a little worried now and confused.

[it'sgrowtime]

I know you said not to comment. I won't comment on you, but I want to say I feel vulnerable posting my thoughts and feelings to the forums. Rereading things I write, getting judged, accidentally hurting others...I haven't been sure of its benefits. It's anonymous, so that helps; but, it's a record of things I'd love to forget...or to not be a part of me. These forums are part confession, commiseration, camaraderie... At times I've cried, sweated, freaked out about my posts, and felt encouraged and hopefully encouraged others a time or two. Exposing myself to myself and others on the forums expands my comfort zone. I've probably been timid, but less timid than lurkers. I've gotten triggered sometimes and come out swinging. I still don't know why I come to these forums...but I know my participation has opened up parts if me I'd rather keep shut. However, my goal is to make peace with myself...all of me.
Sorry to post this on your thread, mr stranger. But reading your post brought this out for me.

[Open Eyes]

I am weak to keep my feelings to myself, but posting makes things worse. I read some (explicit and implicit) accusations through others' posts and "Thanks" to others.

A lot of times the "thanks" you are seeing are when another member feels the comment applies to their own challenge that may be very similar to yours. When one is vulnerable, sometimes it can feel like criticism when all it really is about is "I have that problem too, and that post helped me look at it in a different way".

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

A lot of times the "thanks" you are seeing are when another member feels the comment applies to their own challenge that may be very similar to yours. When one is vulnerable, sometimes it can feel like criticism when all it really is about is "I have that problem too, and that post helped me look at it in a different way".

This. Absolutely. I often read and thank replies which were not to me because they do 'touch' me and my own struggles past and present. I would never criticise you or anyone else posting on here Mr.Stranger - this is the safe place to reach out to others. Most of us here struggle with some issues in our lives and we understand that pain.

[Ljj7000]

I am sorry to hear about your situation. Just know that you are valued on this forum.