Intense emotions to be cuddled/held by a mother

Hello
I just wanted to share my story (sorry for the long post).

I really want to hear from mothers here. Reason why.. because I have never shared my feelings to any other mother out there and want to know their prospective. If you have a friend like myself, and know that I have such feelings to be cuddled and breastfed, what would you?

Now, at the age of 26, as a grown woman, it's very rare when someone shows mother affection towards me. But inside of me, I feel a little baby.

I met this lady, few months ago, who is like 5 years older than me (31 yo), but she's a mother of 3 kids already. A great mother actually, who spoils me with food and sometime invites me over her place - as a friend. We both have good time, shared laughs and good memories. Her husband is also nice and always cares.

But then,.. I developed that little feeling towards her as a mother. Yes, that mother-figure obsession, and it's sooo intense. I'd imagine her being my carer, my mother-figure, ...etc.
This relationship put some insane emotions and thoughts in my head, because I need her motherhood feelings also, so much.

I now feel more physically in need for affection. She's there, she's caring. A tiny 'hello/goodbye hug' doesn't do justice for my feelings. I want cuddles, I want to smell her and sleep beside her. I even want her to put me to sleep, play with may hair until I fall asleep. *Insomnia sufferer here*.

I actually - and I admit - that I sometime when I'm sick, will just imagine her breastfeeding me to sleep. *She's bfd the little one now*. I know .. this is insane, but I can't help myself. I just want to try and clam under her arms.

I don't know how to cope with those feelings, they won't go away they just get worsen the more I'm away from her I never cuddled with her, never tried,, I'm too shy and she's not too touchy

--As a side note, I'm good in all other aspects of life. Educated, good paying job, taking care of my father, an active member of several mother-children related associations and local charity organisations.

Please help

.... up ....

How was your relationship with your mother when you were younger? Tipically in this kind of situation a therapist is a good option.

I think a therapist would be a good option. But be careful..... some therapists do use a “breast feeding” “model” of therapy. And they would have to be very skilled and empathic to be successful. Btw If you do have therapy and it doesn’t turn out well...... do NOT allow the therapist to BLAME you. Good luck

PS I also suggest researching childhood emotional neglect, attachment disorders and other mental health issues first. This is important. You may be able to heal yourself and avoid the financial and possible emotional cost of therapy.

And if you do find a good therapist, being informed first is ALWAYS a good thing. And if you find a sub optimal therapist, being informed and having good insight into self and others is essential.

Forgot to mention, mom passed away when I was 16.

My relationship with her wasn't bad. I loved her, she cared lot and gave unconditional support but she had never showed emotions toward me. She didn't reject me, it's just .. she didn't initiate any emotion. She had neutral emotions towards me. And I was happy with that (didn't ask for more).

Because I also was sorehead as a teen. I wasn't mature enough to realise the role of mothers either, I'd get angry at her sometime or be in mood swings for little things (ie. not allowing me to come home late, dress cool, date guys,.. etc.). Later, I only knew her value when i grew up and she was gone.

If she's her today, I'd fix everything and work hard to be in healthy relationship with her. i'd buy her gifts and flowers not only on mother's days but every weekend. This is what I do now, with any kind mother I meet. I'm obsessed with mothers especially those who are young-souls and caring.

That may be the root of these feelings. Are you considering therapy as an option?