How are you coping today? #7

I've been playing games and taking breaks to do housework.

trying to stay positive, but im anxious

I’m glad to hear that.

I’m watching self help video and journaling to figure out what I need to do to be happy with my present.

I’m coping by watching a lot of television and movies in a room by myself with the door shut.

i'm heading towards meltdown mode

i'll never be free from 2012 will i

Oh my goodness! That's PTSD or CPTSD talking! That's why we are here in our wonderful forums, dear very wonderful willowtigger! We understand & can help each other to get through the painful flashback reminders. Hug, hug, hug!!

I’m watching some new movies today on Hulu after and argument with my older brother

I didn't do much work today, but just let my unconcious mind process today's session. The work I did do, I finished, so I do have some sense of accomplishment.

Be careful what you wish for is all i will say

I wished for the black hole to clear and although its still there, it released two bad memories so far

*His* first arrest the day before my birthday, i remember a police saying about it not being a good birthday present, having a family member arrested

Other memory that the brain black hole released was suicide attempt

God bless you, with all my heart, dear wonderful willowtigger! I have him in my past, too. And the fear & memories may never go away. But please keep trying to find freedom from the past, dear wonderful friend. .... How am I coping today? How am I able to get through this? Maybe, probably really good, blessed genes, & also from the influence of some really wonderful people I have known throughout my life, whom I continue to give thanks to God for always.

I’ve got a medical appointment today so I’m hopeful that may lead to a better treatment option than I currently have. I hate going to the Drs so had to make myself phone, but realise I need to change something.

Good luck with your appoimtment today, Discombobulated! And I hope the rest of your day turns out really nice.

Thank you Dawn, you too!

The whole of the internets loves a Breaking

I hope it went well

The whole of the internets loves a disco as well

i went for a walk, and listened did some cleaning..

the whole internets loves a music as well

I think I took a nap, & I sort of remember dreaming something with people in it.

It’s been a few weeks where I have been able to control my emotions, distract with reading. I feel really good about this! I am reading The Body Keeps The Score about PTSD. The feelings I have, what the trigger unleashes, is exactly what they describe. Really interesting. They say it is the feeling of not being seen, not being validated, feeling treated as you are not seen and heard, respected. The PTSD reaction of emotional lability is a response to even that perception. However, in my case it is not perceived. It is dealing with my nearest and dearest who truly treat me with that disrespect because they are empathy challenged and really just don’t care enough to respect my boundaries, opinions, wants, needs. I am feeling stronger and better about myself, moving forward.

I been keeping myself busy around my home and journaling my feelings.

Reading & posting in our forums.

I declutter a little from under my bed and watch a movie after my brother who called me for an hour and berated me on the phone for things that were none of his business.

Today I managed to hold my anger and accept it. It made everything better. It shrank even, when I held it. And my (bad) fantasies evaporated. I know it's just the beginning of a long road, but I'm grateful to my T for helping me, to myself for having the courage to take it, and even to the panic attacks that first made me go seek help.

I haven’t had a meltdown in a month! Things are fine atm with h and I. I’ve smartened up about him, too! He is being supportive of me in dealing with FOO situation. The severe emotional breakdown I had over the discard of my sister actually made me strong and prepared me for dealing with them now. I now understand who they are! No more naive thinking of family being loving and caring for real. It’s all good. I am doing my best for everyone, handling it smartly and professionally. I am feeling good, strong and proud of myself!

I made myself stay busy