Making A Change

I know I need to exercise. I know I need to stop eating crap. I know I need a better work-life balance. But for some reason, I’m stalled on all these. I know I need to do all of this, but for some reason I’m stuck in the same old rut. I think I’m depressed. I have friends, at least. I have a home. A job— one that may kill me, but still a job. A gorgeous, feisty kitty that I love. I think I need to start seeing a therapist or something. I don’t know. I called out from work today… yesterday was so unbelievably horrible, even though I was only there for three hours. I couldn’t do it today. I feel like so much of my waking hours are spent planning and dreaming and not actually doing. To say I’m frustrated with myself is an understatement. **** it. I just know something needs to change. Or maybe a lot of things.

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I feel like you do indigo1015..........And I don't even have a job I have to go to ! I'm retired but disabled. I feel
like there are a million things I SHOULD be doing but am not. Why ? Take your pick. I'm in chronic pain which limits what I CAN do . Physically. Mentally if I couldn't just focus long enough on one thing I would probably be successful at it. But my concentration level is very low. I could just say f*** it and let myself deteriorate into oblivion ( which is probably my subconscious desire ). I'm TIRED , and probably so are you .
Wish you happiness in whatever you do......ll

indigo1015,

It does sound like you could be depressed. The inability to make a move, and achieving a sustained effort at goals you've set for yourself is a definite sign---and let me add, it's not your fault.

I would absolutely try and see a doctor and/ or a therapist. They can get you on to the right kind of path for feeling better.

And the sooner done, the better chance one has of beating it!