Trauma memories in dreams

I started with one literally minutes after i went to sleep, i dreamed of Ebony on the vet table on her last day with me, i hope to crap she knew i was there cause by that point she was blind and deaf

She was having fits on her last night, kept walking in circles, although i still dont know how she lived another 4 years after the vet had basically said she would be dead in 2 years, medically thats what they expected of her

She was never going to live a normal life cause when they saw her when she got rescued they didnt originally think she would live at all, then they decided she could live for 2 years then she fought and could get rehomed and lived for 4 years 2 months and a day, from the day i took her on

How do i stop my stupid brain from replaying how she died, in my sleep?

@felineangel I am sorry for the loss of Ebony. They sound like they were part of your family. It must be a deep grief you feel.

Some people make lists of all the highlights of their pet's life. Just finding your home must have been a big highlight. With that list of wonderful times you can say to yourself and to Ebony in your mind, "I did the best I could to have a good home for you. I hope you are at peace now."

Letting go of the guilt is not always easy, but you did do the best you could. You must have done something right, they lasted twice as long as the doctor's expected. Your love kept Ebony alive where doctors could not see that happening. What a gift you gave to Ebony. Pat yourself on the back for that. You did a great thing for Ebony. You gave them a loving home when no one else would. If Ebony could talk now, they would probably say Thank you!

@CANDC

I want to give you a hug because I know how much you’re suffering. I mean…I DO understand you.
You’re a nice soul. You showed it with your feelings for Ebony. You met an angel and she met and had the care of an angel, too.
Thank you for being like that.

It takes a time. Nightmares are normal because there’s something moving inside you, deserved or not.
I’m also grieving the loss of my doggie. He passed away two months ago and I can’t still see a video of him without crying…well, indeed I don’t allowed myself to see a video now. I need time.

Some time ago I read an article about recurrent nightmares and it was advised to write them down. I guess the reason is to work on them somehow. When it’s about a loved being’s loss I don’t know if it is useful to do it.
I don’t know what else to tell you. I know nothing I could say it’s gonna help you. Take your time. As long as you need.