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#1
May 11, 2009, 10:34 PM
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Im sick of having a boyfriend, im sick of being a mother, im sick of having to do everything, im sick of never having any me time, im sick of not having any freedom, im sick of not being able to act my own age, im sick of having to pay for everything, im sick of my llife and the way it has turned out. I wan to be free. I want to be able to stay up all night and sleep all day. I want to live in a crappy house with all my friends and live off take away food. I want to go to the pub at 10am on a wednesday and get drunk. I want to go on a road trip. I want to have not a single worry, care or responsibility. I want to kiss a complete stranger. I want to live like i did when i was 17. I hate my life and i wish it turned out the way i planned and not the way i always feared.im tired of feeling guilty about feeling like this bttt i think i have every right to feel like this because every decision i every made in life was to make someone else happy. I hate my life and wish i had the guts to end it all...
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#2
May 12, 2009, 04:23 AM
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((((((((((Rachie)))))))))))
 
__________________
Rebecca "If you're going through hell -- keep going." - Winston Churchill It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection. - Elizabeth Gilbert Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong, we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on. Bring on the wonder, bring on the song, I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long. - Susan Enan http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/ |
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#3
May 12, 2009, 02:20 PM
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Many young mothers, and maybe even most young mothers, often feel like you do, so you are part of a very big crowd.
Would you seriously consider giving up your child for adoption? Do you think it could get to that point? You need some strong real-world support to help you make the right decisions. Don't try to figure everything out by yourself.
__________________
The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The Beginning 
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 Catherine2
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#4
May 12, 2009, 05:54 PM
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Id never give my son up for adoption i know that for a fact. I just need a break or a very long holiday. I feel i need to get away for a little while before i go completely insane. Everyday i get crazier and crazier. I know im losing my mind! But ill never get away, if i say i need a break ill get yelled at and made feel completely guilty for wanting time to myself. So ill just sit in my little corner and slowly lose my sanity...
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#5
May 12, 2009, 06:03 PM
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((((((((((((((((( Rachie )))))))))))))))))))))))
I am sending you some hugs.
__________________
 Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one." C.S. Lewis visit my blog at http://gimmeice.psychcentral.net |
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#6
May 12, 2009, 06:12 PM
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(((((((((((((((((( Rachie ))))))))))))))))))
__________________
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#7
May 12, 2009, 06:20 PM
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(((((((((((((((everyone)))))))))))))))
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#8
May 13, 2009, 05:32 PM
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(((RACHIE))). I am sorry that you are going through this. I am sure you feel so alone and isolated in how you are feeling, but have you ever been tested for Post Partum Depression? A lot of women feel the same way and it could be Post Partum Depression, and it can even make you feel deprived of attention even after having a baby and even more alone. I hope things get better for you soon Rachie, and possibly get help from someone that Could give you a short break for a while to allow you some time to yourself. Take care. Soidhonia.
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#9
May 13, 2009, 10:31 PM
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Hi, Rachie! I hope you get a break, a time of real, restorative rest, and may no one yell at you for it (if they do yell, may you not hear it or may those voices never reach into your consciousness).
__________________
My dog  mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.
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#10
May 14, 2009, 09:06 AM
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I dont think i have post partum depression as ive been like this for many years before i had my son. I personally think i may be bipolar but i dont know. I have my first pdoc appointment in just over a week. Hopefully ill be able to sort my life out soon but for now that seems like its completely impossible. Ah how wonderful it would be to get some real me time. At the moment the only me time i get is when i go to the supermarket to get bread and milk and if im gone longer then 10minutes my bf has the shits because i took so long. Pfft whatever! Grr that annoys me!
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#11
May 14, 2009, 02:05 PM
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If your bf is psychologically abusive, then dump him.
You really need to stand up for yourself. You deserve a better life.
__________________
The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The Beginning
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