so many parts of me....please listen

There are so many parts of me and they all keep getting on top of each other and its doing my head in.

A strong one - she is what is making me get the strength to post today and try and be adult about it all and reach out.

A caring one - she wants to be here for ppl on the forum to support and make friends.

A little one - she wants hugs and ppl to look after her whatever she does or says.

An alone one - she thinks she doesn't need ppl and can cope with her illness all by herself.

A give-up one - she has had enough and wants to lay down and not care about anything or anyone anymore.

A deep thinking one - she thinks about every thing including 'the forum experience' so much and in so much detail.

A searching one - she is looking for something or someone that will help her to see the meaning in what this life is all about.

A creative one - she loves making things and has so many great ideas for new projects.

A silly one - she loves being like a kid, playing with her kittycats, talking silly stuff and dancing.

An ill one (depression and ME/CFS) - she has ups and downs, permanent aches and brain fog.

A worthless one - she is small and is almost invisible, dosent want anyone to notice her.

Are there any more ? Probably. I just wanted to get it out to you. Feeling so fed up with it, I want to talk about it all but everything I do at the moment brings on all the migraine/aching/exhaustion crap plus all the guilty feelings and paranoia.

'you haven't posted for ages' or 'nobody wants to hear about you' on and on......

Just wanted to reach out to you today, at least I have done something positive by doing this but even as I write the urge is strong to delete it all.

I'm going to do it quick before I can change my mind.

(((((((((((hugs to all))))))))) Poppet

poppet, i'm glad you posted.......i'm sorry that you're feeling down. i get so caught up in my own "movie" and i miss things.....xoxox pat

Hi Poppet, just remember we love you big time here and your never alone we are with you
Angie

((((((((((((((POPPET))))))))))))))

We love every aspect of you. I think its great that you are so in touch with all the different sides of yourself. I never really thought about things like that and it has given me a new outlook in a way. It's ok to feel all those things.
I am so sorry your feeling down right now. Please do not feel like you are alone. You have us.

(((((Dear Poppet)))))))))

I think it's fantastic & extremely "together" that you are aware of every one "in there" It shows great potential in the recovery process, so I bow to you for your great insight.......I also realize how "heavy & depressing" that awareness can drag w/ it

I am very proud of your apparent inner strength that you show in just getting the posting submitted Keep it up! You will find much support,true understanding & validation from the folks in these forums!

A big gold star for you today! And hey, congrats on getting all of that feeling into a posting...It's a definite positive sign! (((((((hugs***if wanted )))))

Keep on rockin'(posting/talking)No matter what the content, it vital to get out among your peers here! No judging, open minds and loving understanding...always!

((((((((((((((((((( DAYZEE))))))))))))))))))))))

Hi Poppet -- I'm glad you posted.

My T made me do an exercise just like the one you posted, when we were first starting out together. It was helpful to recognize those many parts of me.

I can't remember what we did to integrate them -- I didn't have the feeling that you do that they were "getting on top of each other and doing my head in." Are you working with a counselor, especially one with a bit of knowledge of Jungian or gestalt therapy? S/he might have suggestions.

The other thing I would suggest -- and I don't have any training in psychology, so this is just my two-cents -- can you perhaps start to see these many parts of you as rays of light shooting through a prism, or the lights of a hologram coming together to form a multi-dimensional image? Honoring and respecting each of the parts for how it contributes to the whole, and acknowleding that they all work together to form that YOU that you are.

I'm glad you posted again Poppet.

((((((((((((((((((((((you))))))))))))))))))))

to all of you, once again I feel so honoured that you chose to respond - doing a post like that takes it out of me but I knew I had to get it out of my head.

I felt a lot easier after I'd done it - its funny how 'the mind' just knows what to do to help me feel a bit better. I think I am coming 'up the slope' again now !

((((((((((((((Pat))))))))))
((((((((((((Angie)))))))))))))
(((((((((Jmo)))))))))))
((((((((((Dayzee)))))))))))
((((((((Wants2fly))))))))

Hope you are keeping well........ Poppet

poppet........glad you're feeling better.....hope your day is as sunshine filled as mine is.......we're having a beautiful weekend here in Oklahoma!!

Hi Pat................Today has been lovely, first really sunny spring day of the year.........just realised, its afternoon for you at the moment - its 9.45pm where I am !

Everyone's been outside, apart from me..............I did open all my windows though ! but I kept my 2 cardigans and scarf on indoors .

The M.E. I have makes me feel the cold - even when it isn't - but I can laugh about it today !

Peace...........Poppet

it's 3 pm. here.........lovely day.