[starrina]

As a young girl I suffered a lot of a**e from various people
One of these people I decided to take to court
This all came about when I found out that my daughter had suffered at the hands of her cousin, I wanted to show her that
it is ok to stand up and tell someone and not as I did live in fear
but I guess I failed at this oh sure he went to court they made fun of me
as did my "family" but this was for my daughter so I did not care what they thought and in the process of all of this I discovered that the person I had called "father" well guess what he is not my "father'
Despite all that hurt like a bi**

Now my girl and I have a very unhealthy relationship she often tells me I do not listen to her that I never take an interest in her life etc etc
However when I do I am told where to go in no uncertain terms
and I feel like what is the point in my being here apart from the little respect I get from my son everyone here calls me names acusses me of things that are not true etc and yes I will be honest I get so frustrated and hurt and all I see is all that yesterday stuff in my face I lose it to

Last weekend she came home drunk and spent the night with her head in the toilet I do not agree with her drinking I have always tried to stop this she has been doing this for a couple years now but her father he does not care what I think or feel about it and he just goes and buys it for her
she asked me "if you knew I was being sick why did you not get up to check on me,Oh no wait you are to lazy to care"

I told her that if you choose to get drunk do not expect me to help you I have told you I disagree you are only 16yrs old she as well as my husband
are well aware that I my mother and her mother are or were alcholics but shes knows best she says just because you were does not mean I will
No it dosent but you have a higher chance of it but.

Sorry you know I want to walk away and not ome back ever but I cannot do that that would be breaking one of my own codes by which I live so I guess the best I can hope for is one day she and hubby will shut the f***** up and leave me alone.

[JudeeB]

If your daughter was mistreated by someone then couldn't the drinking and anger be about trying to cope with the pain and confusion of that?

I was abused as a child and I spent most of my life trying to cope with the unresolved pain and anger. Many of my coping mechanisms were self destructive as well.

I can hear your pain and confusion. There is not much worse than finally telling what was done to us and having the ones we care about not believe us. I was 38 when I finally spoke up and no one in my family of origin believed me. I was so hurt and angry! Two years later I had a breakdown and had to be hospitalized. My heart goes out to you.

You have so many emotional issues battering you right now. What are you doing to help yourself? Coming here and sharing is one good thing, do you have anyone else to talk to? You sound so alone.

here's a hug if you want one

Judy

[darkpurplesecrets]

((((starrina))))

So sorry you are feeling this way and that you have been unbelieved. First I want to validate you and what happened. I do believe you and I know how cruel family can be and how they do not believe you and do not support you. But I do believe you and want you to know that you are not alone. I am sorry for all the pain you feel.

I am sorry your daughter and her dad are treating you badly also. I understand about the drinking issue. I do not believe you do not care about your daughter and sometimes we have to give them tough love. She may not understand it right now, for at 16, they sometimes feel they have all the answers and they just do not listen. I also wonder if something happened to her as that is a possibility for her destructive behavior. Just a thought. But it is still no excuse for the treatment you are getting.

I am glad you posted and shared with us. I know it had to be hard but sometimes writing it can help. Hang in there and know you are not alone. I do hope you have someone to talk to IRL that can be there to support you and listen. Know we are here and listening and walking there with you so you are not alone. Do you have a t? Maybe that would help you.

I hope you will continue to post and let us know how you are feeling. We are here and listening.

dps