What is wrong with me...........................

I ask this question. Screaming within yet silence without. Tears streaming within yet nothing showing outslde of myself. Others within so scared. Constantly looking around wondering if someone is there. If someone is watching. If someone can hear. But what are they hearing for we are silent for the most part. Realizing that we are alone. That we have to make a choice in order to live. In order to not be hurt or worse.

What is wrong with me? Those within so afraid to be heard or seen except outside the walls of this place. Outside where there is air to breath, life existing without fear, and no one stopping us in our our breath to feel just anything. Not worrying if fear is seeping through the walls or breaking through the floors. If the walls breath the very fear that we feel within. Where sleep can come without fear of what lies within.

Nothing making sense. Little ones wondering if there is safety anywhere, if love exists anywhere, and feeling noone knows. Finding it hard to take one breath, to take one chance to reach out. To find words to tell what goes so deep yet fear of allowing those words to surface. And needing to for our own sanity, but even sanity does not find it's way to our very being. For fear overtakes and the breath does not come.

Maybe I make no sense but I am trying. I am afraid, yet I need to reach with all I can. And this I am trying. Can anyone hear me?

dps

((DP))) fear is the thing that makes ppl stand still and not do whats needed for self care.
love exists please know that. Life is a good thing, breathing is good it keeps you going.
Take the chance and let ppl know. As it matters...
(((((((((((((remember you matter)))))))))))))))))))))))

Jeez! You're in a bad time
Please do something, change your daily routine or this thing will twist around itself. Reaching out was good: of course there is people who hear and care, this thread is going to fill up quickly!

((((((((((((( dps )))))))))))))))))

We hear you, I am sending you lots of hugs

I can hear you.

((((((((((((darkpurplesecrets)))))))))))

I hear, darkpurplesecrets. There is nothing wrong with being human. Scared and alone is difficult.

About the fear, the following is from a card I carry with me for coping with anxiety and panic. Perhaps it may be of benefit.

1. Remember, feelings of panic are just exaggerations of normal bodily stress reactions.

2. Sensations are neither harmful nor dangerous - just unpleasant. Nothing worse will happen.

3. Anxiety is temporary. Instead of fighting it, relax into it. Just let it be.

4. Focus on facing the fear rather than trying to avoid it or escape from it.

5. Stop adding to the panic with frightening thoughts of where panic will lead.

6. Stay in the present. Be aware of what is happening to you rather than concern yourself with how much worse it might get.

7. Notice that when you stop adding to panic with the frightening thoughts, the fear begins to subside.

8. Wait and give the fear time to pass.

9. Look around you. Plan what you will do next as the panic subsides.

10. When you are ready to go on, do so in an easy, relaxed manner. There is no hurry.

11. Think about the progress made so far, despite all the difficulties.

Your post has so much in it. Rather than speculate, perhaps you could tell us how to help you feel less alone, less scared or less hesitant to address the issues challenging you right now.

Your posts have helped me. Thank you, and good luck!

Just echoing the Byzantine. The feelings themselves are no real indicator of whether or not you are in danger. They are unpleasant as heck. you will not die from them. You will not go mad from them, though it might feel that way. Try to focus on your breathing, not to change it, but just to note that yep, it's still doing what it needs to do regardless of how you feel. Make sure you know where all of you is, DPS. run a check from your toes to your head and check in on that breathing. You are here, you are now. You are safe.
Do you have someone to talk to? to call or who can sit with you while you get this under control? Feeling for you, honestly. Hell are those panic attacks and the anxiety in between. You're not alone there, though. Try to get som rest, take a warm bath, anything that helps calm you even a tiny bit. HUgs, Dps

I hear you dear ((((((DarkPurpleSecrets)))))) and I am here for you. Fear can paralize, I hope you will soon be free...

((((((((DPS)))))))) - I hear you. I love you and you can always "talk" to me... it doesn't have to be words always either. Not everything has to make sense, but sometimes we all just need a shoulder to cry on. I'm just sad I'm nowhere nearby IRL.

Fear is a hard emotion to deal with. I know that, especially because I have therapy homework this week to write about my fears. And it's freaking SCARY. But you're not alone, even if I'm on the other side of a computer screen. Feeling alone is normal though, but it doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt like we've been abandoned. It doesn't help when we feel unloveable and unwanted. But you ARE loved and wanted dear - I promise you that.

Deep breathing. Do you know how to do meditative breathing? Have you ever learned? Perhaps that's something you can try to learn how to do. It can be very calming to take deep breaths, just sometimes we can start hyperventilating and that's not good either.

You do have to make a choice in order to live. I know you're strong, even if you feel weak. Most people couldn't go through all you've been through - you have a strong will and spirit, you just need to find it within yourself.

Can you find a way to calm the others? Let them know that everything WILL BE OKAY. It just takes a lot of time. Try to do selfcare stuff, fun stuff that will help to calm all of you. You deserve to take time to care for yourself.

I hear you. I see you. I'm your friend, no matter what.

(((((((((((((((((( dps )))))))))))))))))))

(((((DPS)))))
We are here for you. Keep talking. Take deep breaths.

{{{{{{dps}}}}}}}} I hear you and am here for you. Know that you are well loved and safe.

Mary Alice

DPS,

Learning what to do too...so near you as if you are even in my heart.

Hunny











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