[MissE1088]

does anyone else feel like? i always avoid looking at people or letting people look at me. i am so afraid of people judging me i realized lately how out of control i let it get. and when i am talking to someone face to face i find it so hard to concentrate on what they are saying and all i think about is if they are judging me. im not anti social i never used to be at least but i definitely try to blend in i dont like to me noticed. i cant stand being judged i just want to cry all the time

Hello, MissE. Since I felt different and damaged, I too experienced difficulties in social and business settings. To do my job, I needed to find out what clients wanted; to look, to listen, to understand. I made a sign for myself to remind me this is about them and not about me. When I focused on others I found less need to worry about me.

[BloodshyRose]

MissE,
It could possibly be low self esteem... which is a ***** to have.
You are not alone!
* Hugs *

[romanjames2004]

Low self esteem is a major symptom of depression. When I feel depressed, I just want to hide myself from anything that stands in my way. In resturnats I sit in the dark corner where no one can see me. Then the worst thingis that I feel that I am heavy when people tell me I am not and I know they are lying but they say "oh no youre not heavy at all." and then I go shopping and the persopn helping me is even heavier than I am says, "Oh you look like youre about the same size as me..." lol. Sory to rant but I think that self esteem issues are the worst. I wish everyone looked at eachother like a god. what I like to do is sit infront of a mirror and sort of concentrate on myself. And I only observe the things that are really goo about me. I love when my hair looks great, or I love when I dress in an outfit that I really look great it. I feel that it makes me fell like I can conquer the world.

I am sure you are a great person and beautiful in every way.

[stefano]

I don't have this type of issues, but it affects my best friend, and when I hear talking about it I often wonder if it is a matter of phisical appearance or just fear of being generally repulsive. May I ask: If you were under heavy clothes, your features not visible, would you mind being observed?

[sorrel]

I've had strangers stare at me, yes.
For me it's more a Complex PTSD issue than depression, though.

[lonegael]

My problem is more being confused with people I never have met, by people who I never want to meet! Last time it was a guy fresh out of prison out looking foor someone he really thought was my brother.... His homey got wise and convinced him that I and my son were not who he was looking for Other sweethearts have been Neo Nazis gettingthe idea I was Jewish (In and of it's self, not a problem, but with them thrown in, a problem) or wacky Berkeley activists thinking I'm fascist because they saw me talking with the Neo Nazi (Telling him to leave before I throttled him with the chain to my Celtic cross). I tend to try to blend in anyway, but I think it is a hold over from years of being bullied. I try not to catch anyone's eye.... Hugs, all!

[billieJ]

Dear MissE - you described my feelings to a tee! Socially anxious and fearful of driving, I neglect getting out to have my hair done, and poverty does nothing to help that. This contributes to the problem. However, I concur with the Byzentine above that concentrating on the feelings of others is a helpful tactic. Whether or not you think your own smile is nice [which is probably is], most people would welcome it. Give a compliment to a stranger, when you honestly can. When you must be in social situations, ask questions of others, and they will not be looking at you, but inward at themselves, as they prattle on in delight at talking about themselves. Be sure to listen, bearing in mind that all/most of us live lives of silent desperation. Bless you, MissE ~ billieJ

[sas123]

I'm the same but I find I'm not as bad at work. I do ultrasound and find that when I'm doing my job I can communicate with my patients really easily, I suppose I'm more in control of the situation. Socially I find it really hard to talk to people I don't know, and eye contact always makes me feel awkward.
I've always been shy, though, and at the age of 42 I've woked out strategies to deal with it.
Just remember, MissE that most people aren't judging you, and if they are they have a problem, not you!!

[onlyme2]

MissE1088... I know exactly how you feel, as I am always afraid of being judged when people look at me... it's been a gradual thing for me, I live far away from family and then I don't call my friends to get together with them all that much anymore, now I just leave the house to go to work, I sit down and avoid being social with people and then I go home... I usually will be in the house alone all weekend when I don't work

[MissE1088]

thank you everyone, and thank you billieJ that was some good advice. i believe i have social anxiety. not only do i have low self esteem i find it hard to think of something to say when i am around people. i never used to be like that i dont know what has become of me! but i can tell that people i know don't even want to be around me, because im so quiet and nervous. but thats prob why i avoid people all together so that this doesn't happen... it is so sad that i would rather be alone than with people just because i am afraid of them judging me for who i am. im a good person i just have a lot going on within myself with my emotional issues and trying to get better all the time, i really dont know how to interact anymore..

[FeelingHopeful]

Hugs MissE 1088, I have been going through some stuff too, And Find I am having the same prob also, Hugs!!! I know its not easy, Hang in , we are all here for you!

[*freak*]

Originally Posted by MissE1088

does anyone else feel like? i always avoid looking at people or letting people look at me. i am so afraid of people judging me i realized lately how out of control i let it get. and when i am talking to someone face to face i find it so hard to concentrate on what they are saying and all i think about is if they are judging me. im not anti social i never used to be at least but i definitely try to blend in i dont like to me noticed. i cant stand being judged i just want to cry all the time

Sounds like social phobia to me. I have it and I feel exactly like this.
So sorry you're hurting Hang in there and take good care of yourself