[msolson81]

It is immensly hard for me to even write this. I feel so weak asking for help.

I was hospitalized back in September due to my depression and having suicidal thoughts. I ended up completing a 3 week partial hospitalization treatment program for my depression. I learned a lot of good coping skills and felt it was very helpful.

I have been home sick from my job for the past 2 days (this is only my 3rd week on the job) and am feeling very depressed and anxious that they will fire me. I feel like I have been slipping back into my old ways and am scared that I'll get back to where I was before I went into treatment.

Any words of wisdom about what you have done so that you don't go back to your old ways of coping??

Thanks, Melissa

Hello, Melissa. Thank you for your post. Are you getting professional help? Can you call your therapist? If not, can you call someone from the treatment program? Do your meds need adjusting?

What is the sickness? Are you referring to the depression? How do you like the new job?

[caring_whiterose]

I had gotten sick when I just got a new job too, so I know how you are feeling. Everything was fine for me. The only advice I can give which is probably not that good but here goes, over thinking and worring the situtation will not change to out come. I know it is hard to to think bad but I am pretty sure nothing will happen to your job. Everyone gets sick and most people understand it. Please stay strong and take care of yourself. Maybe try drawing or writing.

Originally Posted by msolson81

It is immensly hard for me to even write this. I feel so weak asking for help.

I was hospitalized back in September due to my depression and having suicidal thoughts. I ended up completing a 3 week partial hospitalization treatment program for my depression. I learned a lot of good coping skills and felt it was very helpful.

I have been home sick from my job for the past 2 days (this is only my 3rd week on the job) and am feeling very depressed and anxious that they will fire me. I feel like I have been slipping back into my old ways and am scared that I'll get back to where I was before I went into treatment.

Any words of wisdom about what you have done so that you don't go back to your old ways of coping??

Thanks, Melissa

[msolson81]

I am not seeing a therapist right now due to financial issues and lack of insurance. If I stay on with this job, I will have health insurance come March 1st. I'm not sure if I'd be able to talk with anyone at the treatment program or not. I do like my new job. I'm training to be a credit counselor working with people who are struggling with their mortgage. It is stressfull, but I know it will be rewarding once my counseling skills get a bit sharper.

I have been sick with stomach flu type of symptoms and am planning on going back to work tomorrow. I have been on my Zoloft for about the past month and a half, so I guess it would be a good idea to talk with my doc about the dosage.

Thanks for the questions and suggestions!!

[lynn P.]

Hi Melissa,
I just want you to know that I read your post. It does take alot of courage and it's not a weakness to reach out for help. I'm sorry you haven't been feeling well, but thank goodness you went to the hospital for help. I don't have a diagnosis of depression but I have had some very traumatic experiences these last few years. I know the feeling of deep despair so I guess this counts as some ability to relate. It must be very hard living with it all the time. What kind of self help methods are you doing in addition to your meds and therapy? I know an excellent website if you're ever feeling really low again - I hope you won't need it though. How are things at work? Please hang in there and use the best self help methods that work for you.

[msolson81]

Thanks pootypoo

[BashfullOne]

I've been where you are and wish I had words of wisdom for you. I took it one day at a time and leaned on my family and friends - they managed to get me through the worst of it. My prayers are with you. Just don't give up - take it one day at a time.

[msolson81]

Originally Posted by lynn P.

Hi Melissa,
I just want you to know that I read your post. It does take alot of courage and it's not a weakness to reach out for help. I'm sorry you haven't been feeling well, but thank goodness you went to the hospital for help. I don't have a diagnosis of depression but I have had some very traumatic experiences these last few years. I know the feeling of deep despair so I guess this counts as some ability to relate. It must be very hard living with it all the time. What kind of self help methods are you doing in addition to your meds and therapy? I know an excellent website if you're ever feeling really low again - I hope you won't need it though. How are things at work? Please hang in there and use the best self help methods that work for you.

Thanks Lynn! I am not currently in therapy, but I've been trying to journal and do yoga to help ease my symtoms a bit. I'm also reading a book on mindfullness and getting through depression. Always looking for ideas, though

[amante]

msolson,
I hope your flu symptoms feel better soon. I would definitely get back to the therapy when your insurance kicks in with the new job. Im sure your job will be understanding about having to take time off. the journal and yoga are great things to help ease the depression symptoms. Post when you can on the PC, and lean on the support here. Sending positive vibes in your direction.

[Tamale]

Originally Posted by msolson81

Any words of wisdom about what you have done so that you don't go back to your old ways of coping??

Well, my counselors in the past have told me that after so much time of thinking and coping in one negative/depressive way that it takes just as much time if not more to re-train our brains to think in the new, more positive and realistic, healthy ways.

I would say the journaling, yoga, and returning to therapy soon are great concrete ways. But otherwise, just celebrate any small way that you cope well with a situation. Your job should be understanding about your illness and when you go back, you can congratulate yourself that you were able to return to work, recover, and not let anxiety stop you from returning..that's worth celebrating!
You may not always cope perfectly, but it's important to forgive yourself or not worry too much if you have a bad day and then just continue working and celebrating every small victory.

Good luck, msolson.

[Scottish1]

Hey Melissa,
Weakness isn't your problem. It takes guts to deal with this and to ask for help. Don't sell yourself short. Do you have someone close you can see or talk to on a daily basis? A good friend? Don't let yourself get isolated, even though that's your first inclination. I learned that the hard way from my first episode of major depression. Having someone who will check in on you makes a world of difference. Coming into this forum was a good decision.
Hang in. If it helps, I've been exactly where you are. It does get better. There's no particular significance to this dancing chili. I just think he's funny. Hope he makes you smile!

How are you doing, Melissa?

[Scottish1]

How are you feeling today, Melissa?

[msolson81]

Thanks for the kind words of wisdom and concern

This week is going better. I'm feeling better and work is going well, which helps my mental state for sure. I've been trying to stay busy, journal when I feel like it, and talk to my mom on the phone just about every day. I went out with a friend this past weekend, which was good for me. The people watching was amazing and made me feel like maybe I don't have it so bad!!
Thanks again,
Melissa

Yay for you, Melissa.

[Scottish1]

Originally Posted by msolson81

Thanks for the kind words of wisdom and concern

This week is going better. I'm feeling better and work is going well, which helps my mental state for sure. I've been trying to stay busy, journal when I feel like it, and talk to my mom on the phone just about every day. I went out with a friend this past weekend, which was good for me. The people watching was amazing and made me feel like maybe I don't have it so bad!!
Thanks again,
Melissa

Super! Hope you don't feel weak anymore. That was a huge step. Big steps take courage and strength. Good for you.
Scottish1