[Lexicon78]

I have had the worst night of my life. Yesterday I got up and got online. My comp kept freezing...then I called and apologized to my dad's gf for hurting her feelings...then my dad couldn't take me to get smokes, so I walked to the store (3 mile walk) with my bf, got smokes, and then when we got back we found out that we'd locked ourselves out of the apartment. On top of that I've been moodier than hell, which made everything 10 times worse. We finally get in the apartment and later I became suicidal and very depressed about a lot of things...so yeah, it was a bad night for me.

Anymore I am so agitated and moody that I just can't stand myself. I hate feeling this way but I don't see much that I can do about it until I see my pdoc.

[Myzen]

Hi Lex,

Yes, it's when our own moods get out of control that it's hardest. I sometimes think it's like having a hurricane blowing inside of me, and I can't let it out, or being on a spooked horse and I can't get off it.

The most effective strategy for me has been to change something, change my plans somehow, and get my mind onto something else. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

Then there is the breathing and the 'alone' time that we use to bring ourselves down.

Posting here is good too.

Anyway, just wanted to say that I think I know how it is for you just now, as I have been in a similar place myself, more times than I care to remember!

Peaceful thoughts, M

[BlueFaith]

(((((Lexi))))) Sorry you had a rough day yesterday. Sometimes it seems that bad things just keep happening one right after another. You can always PM me if you need to talk ok?

-Jennifer-

I've had days like that.
It helps to have a sense of humor in these situations but that wisdom usually fails me, too, at the time.
Maybe that's all depression is-the loss of a sense of humor.
Hmmm. (pondering...)
Well, you made it through the night and it's a new day. You were able to apologize to your Dad's girlfriend and you have to give yourself credit for that. You got a good long walk and you got your cigarettes. You got locked out of your apartment which is kind of funny because we've all been there.
You'll get out of your grumpiness. You're hurting inside, that's all it is. Just let yourself have a good cry and treat yourself to a day of pampering.
Hope you feel better soon, Lex. You're really having a tough time and I can't wait until the clouds part and a glorious ray of sunshine beams down on you and warms your soul with peacefulness.
(((((Lex)))))))