[AtreyuFreak]

Okay, so right away, I'm gonna put this out there cause I know what 9/10ths of you will think of me by the time you finish reading this: I am NOT a hypochondriac. Need proof?

"Hypochondriac: A person who has hypochondriasis, a disorder characterized by a preoccupation with body functions and the interpretation of normal body sensations (such as sweating) or minor abnormalities (such as minor aches and pains) as portending problems of major medical moment. Reassurance by physicians and others only serves to increase the hypochondriac's persistent anxiety about their health."

My symptoms are REAL. Any "anxiety" I have pertaining to them is, IMO, deserved; and I just want to find a way to live with them. I don't obsess over them, except in dealing with them in therapy and trying to cope.


If you're still reading, I thank you.

I have Dissociative Identity Disorder, Reactive Attachment Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder, Attention Deficit Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, as well as severe depression and anxiety. A coworker recently told me her young son has Asperger's and I act just like him; I snapped at her, saying that I'm f*cked up enough without YET ANOTHER label, and I didn't even bother hearing her explanation.

Because of all this, I am at the moment extremely suicidal. I cannot deal with everything in my head right now, not to mention an overbearing and concerned mother, and a very stressful job. I just don't wanna do this anymore. I'm literally losing it; the finely braided threads that make up my life are finally unraveling. I'm forgetting things at work, I'm VERY paranoid about getting fired. I'm snapping at coworkers, and I hate myself for it. I constantly repeat myself without realizing it; I've gotten rather weird looks from people and eventually realized I'd said "bye" to them twice, or something along those lines.

I don't know where to turn. I'm afraid of going back to the mental hospital. I just want the chaos to end. I honestly don't even expect anyone reading this to believe me...not sure why I'm posting this, to be honest.

Thanks for reading.

[MISERABLE ME]

I do understand and it is very hard having so many different things going on within self at the same time but just remember do not quit 5 minutes before the miracle happens much love and heart felt Hugs to you my friend.

Hi Atreyu Freak!

First off, I believe you! I know how hard it is to live with suicidal thoughts. They can be managed but with extreme difficulty. If it gets to a point where you're going to act on please call the suicide hotline 1-800-784-2433. You can always call me to. PM me for my number. I used to work on a suicide hotline as a volunteer telephone answerer so I'm not afraid of suicide. I'm not afraid of the intense feelings that go with it. Having said that I am no mental health professional, just a listening ear who has been trained to listen. Please keep us posted on how you're feeling.

Love and hugs,
Tara

[Can't Stop Crying]

Is short term disability an option for you? Maybe taking the stress of work off your plate temporarily will help you gather some strength and work on some of the other things? It sounds like you need a break with how overwhelming everything is.

BTW - I believe you too!

[online user]

Oh, yes, I, too, am a believer! I think a lot of times, people with one mental health issue also have others--they go together; the situations that can cause one can cause others. And I understand the irritability that goes with depression--that is one of my signals that I'm more depressed. I get very irritable and snappish. But do take Tara's advice and call for help if you need it. You can get better; I know it. And it will be worth it. Sending you hugs!

[lxegirl]

just dont give up. i know it may seem hard, but you know you can do this. i know you can

[Bill3]

I believe you.

[walksinair]

I believe u. keep posting sharing with supportive empathetic people is great therapy@

[thea_kronborg]

I believe your symptoms are real. I think sometimes people just disagree on the labels or diagnoses, especially since symptoms can overlap. So that woman who said you were like her son who has Aspergers, she probably is just reacting to some behavioral symptom or characteristic that you have in common. It doesn't mean you have Aspergers also.

thea