Back

I have lived for a long while. Sometime it seemed like eternity. I have been hurt many many times. I also know that I have depression, PTSD and Avoidant Personality Disorder. This means that sometime depression will blind me and I will not see what really is there. Also by suffering from APD, I’m very sensitive to rejection. I’m trying my best to fight this disorder. So sometime I have to take a step back to see where I stand.

This time what I saw on all what is going on in here lately is this:

If I have a bad cut on my arm and I bang it somewhere, ouch! It will make me stop. Maybe it will start to bleed again. Maybe I will have to change the bandage. I will have to try to take better care of it if I want this cut to heal.

For me this is what happened here. Words were said that have hurt me and I felt rejection. But nobody hurt me. It is the words that have hit my wounds inside. The wounds were already there a long time before these words were said. It is nobody’s fault.

I was hurt, I took a step back and now I have return.

I am here again to help you if I can.

Thank you to all who have missed me. I love you all!
Time0

time0 this is a great post, and I understand, if I am reading this correctly. I have often discussed how difficult it is on an internet forum like this since people bring all sorts of sensitivities and expose themselves quite often... but you can't say "just don't do it!" because we are here for help, and sometimes in order to get that help we have to expose ourselves, and take that risk.

I am sorry that words here hurt you even if wasn't intentional on anyone's part, and I understand how easily that can happen. But I believe that one way to find a good balance so that one can benefit from this site while also protecting one's self is to do what you have done... take a step back, recognize it, take care of yourself, and then return. I am also glad you are able to express it here.

I think this is a very good skill for someone to have.

(((((time0)))))

Thanks for the very wise post ((((((((((((Time0))))))))))
It's great to see you back. Like dex said what you have spoken about here are good skills for all to have or learn (imo)

Take care,
Fuzzy

Time0,

Being that we have almost identical dx's, I can understand how you must have felt. And I also understand what a big step you have taken in challenging that "little voice" of rejection-- and returning here!! I think that is awesome!!!

Glad to see you back! I did miss you!!

mandy

((((((((((time)))))))))) I'm so glad you are here!!!!

time0 i know exactly how you feel, sometimes i read stuff on here and i totally misinterpret it and take it personally. then i remember everyone has different problems i cant expect everone to understand me and my insecurities i know how real it seems when you have these feelings, but try and remember depression is like lookin through glasses that only let you see the bad things in life. for me anyway depression is a very powerful illusion so powerful its almost real, but deep down i know it isnt. im glad your back on ya feet and thanks for sharing your feelings i was starting to think i was all alone again and thats just what depression wants.

takecare

Thank you!

You are great people!

with love,
time0

I haven't felt that here, but I've felt it in "real life," so I think I have an idea what you mean. I'm glad you came back too.

((((((((((((((((((((((Time0))))))))))))))))))))))

Thank you for this post. You are truely a wonderful person.


Love,


Jen

Thank you!



time0

(((((((((((((((((((((time0)))))))))))))))))))))))

your beauty is amazing. thank you for your words.

KD

Thank you!

time0