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#1
Dec 10, 2005, 04:41 PM
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2 weeks left till Christmas and I have hardly a thing bought.
Just the ornaments we get for hubby's family every year. A shirt for his nephew. I got my dad a small christmas tree so he would have a tree up this year. I have yet to get my 3 sisters their gifts My godsons gifts Hubby's mom and dad sister and her husband and daughter and son needs one more thing Also his brother. I also have to get my godfather something too. And my precioous doggy a present too And I need to get hubby something yet too. We've had car repairs this past week with costs up the wazoo. And I need to make cookies ( dont have ingredients bought yet for them) and the food I have to make for Christmas supper yet . Hubby is keeping me on a strict budget. He doessnt care if stuff gets bought or not. He is hating the holidays.  . Dont know what I can do to bring some joy back into his heart. Its all Bah humbug to him. I dont want anyone thinking I am a cheapskate ya know? I want to get something nice for them. This is tradition for me. I'm a giver. It brings joy to my heart to give. He is so focused on thinking that everyone willhave to be satisfied with not getting anything its breaking my spirit down now. Dont know what I am gonna do. Dont know what I can do. Its just all too depressing to me.
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#2
Dec 10, 2005, 04:48 PM
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Tryin2beme,
Sometimes not buying presents is the most realistic and best approach if money is tight. I hope you and your husband will both find a special joy this Christmas whether you buy more presents or not. Maybe if you can have a conversation with him about the additional presents you want to buy, he'll loosen up some, and go along with you. Jane - Oz |
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#3
Dec 10, 2005, 06:16 PM
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EJ aome of it is that we do have some extra money. But he is trying to find ways of not letting it be freed up for presents. He is constrictimg me too much. And I wish I would have brought this up with T yesterday but stupid me didnt say a word. Its not like I go out and spend oodles of money on gifts. But I do try to get something nice that is on sale. The thing is his family will be upset if they dont get gifts . And somehow the blame will be on me for that if there isnt any. We dont get along the best so they will think I am neglecting them. And thats not it at all! I DONT WANT TO BE THE BAD GUY!!!!!
   
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#4
Dec 10, 2005, 06:22 PM
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Bethy,
That's awful! My mother was over-controlling, so I know what that feels like. It also sounds like there is no way for you to win!!!!!!!! Thanks for sharing. Jane - Oz |
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#5
Dec 10, 2005, 06:36 PM
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I know ~ I'm just screwed is all...
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#6
Dec 11, 2005, 11:00 PM
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I am not even allowed to have my christmas tree and village lights on now during the day. This is getting to be too much! He is just taking all the joy away . Getting to the point nothing is there now .
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#7
Dec 12, 2005, 12:05 AM
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Oh Lordy Pants, hold on to your britches girl we'll send ya some craft ornaments from the group, then if ya need some scarfs just say so and there on the way
Angie
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 A good day is when the crap hits the fan and I have time to duck. |
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#8
Dec 12, 2005, 12:10 AM
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((((((((((((((((((((Beffy)))))))))))))))))))))
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#9
Dec 12, 2005, 12:13 AM
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I'm so sorry that your hubby is stripping the holiday spirit from you. Yes, things must be done yet and I understand things are really tight this year for so many people (including myself) but I don't think that should give hubby the right to try to take it from you. I do understand your need to give, as I am a giver also. It's so heartbreaking when you can't give. This year is that way for me since I haven't gotten a dime to my name this month, so that means no presents for anyone.
Just hang in there and remember that your hubby CANNOT take all of your spirit away because it lies within you, not him.
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"When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed to discover they are not it." -Bernard Bailey |
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#10
Dec 12, 2005, 12:37 AM
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Thanks everyone. just gonna be this way . nothing can be done about it. guess i deserve it for not doing things the way they should be done all these years.
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#11
Dec 13, 2005, 12:23 AM
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Hi Beth -- I'm sorry to hear that this is so stressful for you. Why do your family expect gifts? Are they children? Isn't enough to be together as a family and enjoy that time together?
What did you mean about "not doing things right"? Are lottery tickets available where you are? Would they be happy with a dollar ticket and your wish to give them a million bucks?
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#12
Dec 13, 2005, 02:44 PM
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#13
Dec 13, 2005, 09:43 PM
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I think the cookies are a good idea. Also, is there a dollar store anywhere near you? There are lots of little things you can buy there--candles, soaps, etc. The lotto tickets aren't a bad idea, either. The thought really ought to be the thing, and if your husband's family can't handle that, well you're not responsible for making them happy. If they cause a fuss about it, just tell them that money was tight this year and if they still press you on it, just give them the truth: your husband is being a scrooge.
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#14
Dec 15, 2005, 04:49 PM
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Guys ~ Thanks for your ideas and replies. I finally got the guts up to tell hubby that I need his check this week for shopping for gifts. I explained to him in a way he could relate . That he knows if his mom didnt get a gift she would throw a tantrum. I told him that I will not deal with it. That he will. AND he knows that is not an easy task to take on. He's given in and said ok. I even get his help this year! He is going to go with me tomorrow night if the weather is ok! I am especially happy about this since he will be able to see how hard it is to shop for people! But it makes me so happy to be able to do this! YAY!
  Hahahahaa I even feel like I could do this now! hehehee!!!!!!!Hugz~Bethy
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#15
Dec 15, 2005, 07:42 PM
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I can relate to what you are saying....my dad is having a very rough time at work and he is completely "bah-humbug" about things as well...my family has been through the ringer lately...
Hmmmm...how to bring joy in the house....can you add more decorations?? Something festive but not as expensive?? Would that cheer him up?
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