[Lexicon78]

I have so many things bringing me down right now. I'd like to list everything, but even I don't know what it all is. The holidays seem to bring this all on more than anything. I'm thinking more of my mom, how she made everything so special and everything. There used to be that holiday feeling and that feeling of love that came with the holidays. But that feeling's gone. It left with her. Now the holidays just feel like I'm in a strange place where I get gifts just because I'm there. There's no special feeling in it.

I can't afford to get anyone presents this year, which really brings me down. I can't afford anything. Not even a stupid card for my dad, let alone my boyfriend. I feel so inadequate and useless. It's not like I'm keeping money for bills or food, either. I put in $100 in my checking account just so I'd have some money to eat on. Unfortunately, I was more in the hole than I thought. By the time I put in the money I had $14 for 2 people for food. Most of that food is gone now. And I just checked my balance again, it's back to $-130. I don't know where I'm gonna come up with that. We have a box of mac and cheese, a can of tuna, some cheese, and some bread till we can get $50 on Monday. Yeah, some freakin holiday! I don't even know how I'm gonna make it food-wise till then. I'm stuck. I have nothing.

It's like there's never an end to any of this crap. I keep trying to do everything I can to stay afloat but nothing works.

[nothemama8]

Lex if your close enough to Erie, your welcome here for Christmas and we can give ya a box of food to get ya through
Angie

[GoddessRhiannon]

I have no income right now at all...so I fully understand where you are coming from....I think the lack of funds adds to the sense of uselessness...that I feel t owards myself....which makes my depression worse.

At least I found this board.

check with your area salvation army, St Vincent Du Paul and catholic charities. Each of those agencies are nationwide and have food pantries where you can go to get food. Here I can go to the food pantry weekly and on an extra day they give out fresh baked bread type goods. Check with your areas churches too. they give out food baskets too.

[wisewoman]

Lexi honey hang in there and go to food shelves etc. Just be honest. There is no shame. I am going on Tue to apply for foodstamps. I cobraed my health insurance to the tune of 1,500 so I could keep my daughter covered till the end of her hospitalization. You will be okay. So many people would be glad to help if they knew. Do you have local community action agencies? I know you will be okay but the stress has to stink. Good luck.

[Overcastbutclearing]

Sorry you are going through this struggle right now.
Anything I can do to help you out?