Deciding to shut down

Now, I know this isn't healthy, but I'm just so tired of faking it. Only been on the new (old) meds for a week, so no relief. If I let any feelings out, they're over the top. TMI. I'd rather stay shut down than scare people with my dark feelings. Still haven't scheduled an appt with the T. I'm not even sure if it would help, since I'm so closed off.

I'm just getting tired of waiting for this to pass.

Hello, Sookie3!

• Long-term abusive and isolating relationship
• Termination of that relationship
• Battle with serious illness
• Med changes

I wouldn't have any energy left to invest in faking! Maybe it's best not to fake anything at this point. Tell (phone?) them how it really is.

Wishing you rest and restoration...

Some day some way we will not have to fake anything. People will understand what we live with. Until than we go along the best way that we can. Good luck and try to have a good day.

Have to keep everything in check at work. Won't have a day off for another 9 days. Can't get time off.

Ativan is my only friend....

Nine days!? Strength to you. I hope you can get at least some restorative rest during this time.

Okay, sookie, I believe I've been there--I call it hibernation mode, like my computer when power's almost gone. I'll keep you in my heart & mind for these eight days. Please don't shut down so much you shut us out. Stay connected.
Roadrunner

Hope you are having a better day today! Sending you big hugs! You know the deal takes awhile for meds to kick in. Please schd appt!

Hang in there - take comfort in the fact that there are others of us out there. We are here for you! Tuti

Thanx for all of the wonderful thoughts. I haven't been here long, but I already feel like this is the only place I can talk.

Once I decided to shut down, I seem to have made an unconscious change at work. We write down technical impressions of what we see (I'm an ultrasound tech) in a log. I'm writing my few words in all caps now, as opposed to my usual scrawl. I figure when I''m over this hump, my handwriting will return to normal.

This too shall pass......this too shall pass.....

Wow, when I look at that list, I guess it makes more sense. It'a all happened in the last few years, all on April 22. Left him 4-22-09. Cancer dx 4-22-10. And this year? Closed on a new house 4-22-11.

Maybe I've got more going on in my head than I realize. It sure hurts.

I hate when people say i know how you feel, but in this one i can say it and mean it. I have been faking it for ages, at first it was just easier now its just tiring and im starting to resent the fact that im the one that has to make all the dam effort! I have tried alot of things and when starting meds the transition period can be prtty rough. My only advice go back to you T and discuss it with them, and see what happends. Hope you get what you need.

I think everyone fakes it at one time or another. If there is a truly honest, forthright and genuine person in the world, I haven't met them.