not sure if have some form of depression//losing it slowly

I am slowly losing it. my job gets worse day by day everyone just piles on more and more and I can't keep up no matter how hard I try ....giving up though can't win and now they just complain and conspire to make me myserable these same people who worshipped me for a long time as I worked 30-40 hours ot every two weeks floating the whole damn place by.

My bills just add up more and more each day and no matter what I do it gets worse... he can't find a job after 2 years out here because I was stupid enough to move out here (he had a good one back east).... My daughters really nice though she is pretty and really smart for two.
my damn house is falling apart though and don't no how long till I can't pay the mortage.......... I now sleep in 2 three hours more than I should been late alot lately (past 3 weeks) can't be bothered to get up I guess but I am not lazy my life just sucks so bad I can't stand to face it and getting up just means letting someone down I am really good at that.... my husband is probably gonna leave (only a matter of time) he complains constantly about a lack of sex but I can't have sex I have no interest in it what so ever. i go nowhere now except work and home don't wanna and couldn't afford it anyway. I have no appetite anymore but I force myself to eat something usually once a day but at least i lost the baby weight or at least that's what i've been told...I really don't no how to fix anything and I am at my wits end I can't do this anymore I tried to talk to my spouse but he just says yeah everything sucks or big deal they have pills for that.

sorry to rant like a lunatic I just wanted to het it out it's been all bottled up thought it would clear my head but it doesn't this is the worse year ever the last few months are unbarible I enjoy a fewstolen happy moments literally usually thanks to my darling daughter and every thing else sucks how can life be so unfair why am I so pathetic Iruined all our lives.

Hi hopelessbc (welcome to PC btw)

This is just my general impression, but yes it does sound like depression. Have you spoken to a doctor about any of this? Or do you have a T (therapist)?

I'm sorry that your spouse isn't being supportive of you, sometimes those closest to us just don't/can't understand.

I'd HIGHLY reccommend going to a doctor as soon as possible, there are ways to change how you're currently feeling.

If you want to vent some more, you've found a really supportive environment in which to do it. Some of us have gone through what you are going through (or at least similar situations).

*HUGS* (If you want them)

(and) I agree with Canders...................... ((((((( HUGS ))))))).


LoVe,
Rhapsody -

Hi Hopeless,
Welcome to PC.
You've reached the downward spiral. I shuddered as I read your post because it brought back so many memories of when I was in the thick of my depression.
I'm really sorry you're feeling so terrible.
I could offer all kinds of advice but it's nothing you don't already know-so, I'll just let you know that it does get better, really-eventually, it does.
Unfortunately depression can only be appreciated by the people who've been through it or are going through it themselves so your husband is acting typical and I don't think he realizes how much he's hurting you. It's not your fault you're feeling so blecky and I hope he realizes that you're not intentionally hurting him with not wanting to have sex with him.
Please, stay in touch and allow yourself to feel sad if you need to. Be kind to yourself at this time-you really need it. HUGS!!!!

Yes, I have made an appointment to see my doctor on Friday morning although I have had thoughts nagging ones about not going .....I am not looking forward to talking to him.... I keep thinking that he is going to say no it's not depression my life just sucks enormously too bad so sad no way out.