Too depressed to do my College work...

Hi...I am a 20 year old female and I still live at home with my parents. I suffer from severe clinical depression, OCD, Anxiety, Dyslexia, and ADD.

I recently just started two online classes for collage [I thought it would be easier]...but I am literally finding it extremely hard to even focus or get the motivation to get online and do my work.. I sleep all day and am always tired. To make matters worse...I just recently suffered a concussion that has left me with occasional vision problems, extra fatigue, mental confusion, and some hearing loss with constant tinnitus.I got the concussion on News Years Eve but am still having problems. My twin sister also recently died [I saw everyting] and I am dealing with that grief as well as unwanted flash backs. I honestly don't know how to cope...My dad is demanding that I do not fail these classes so I am trying but the course structure is so disorganized and with my Dyslexia I find it very hard to organize and make sense of what I'm suppose to do. Add my A.D.D and I have trouble focusing ON TOP of everything else.

I do not want to fail...these courses are subjects I am usually interested in...but finding the mental energy to do them is so hard... when my parents put pressure on me to focus on my studies I have an anxiety attack and become suicidal.

I must be crazy.

I don't know what to do

My condolences, NightFire. I can't imagine how tough it would be to lose a sibling.

I've had trouble finding the motivation when I'm depressed, and I also have trouble focusing. Doesn't matter that I'm incredibly interested in the material, and it doesn't help that I always feel tired to one extent or another.

Now all those other things on top of the disorders you have... that is a heck of a lot to cope with, and it definitely doesn't help that your parents don't seem to understand. Do they know that you've been having these problems? And are you seeing a school counsellor or someone else that could help you with things, maybe start meds?

I'm not sure what to say, but I do know that you are not crazy. If you were, half the world would be, and then what's the point of saying you're crazy? You're dealing with a lot right now, and all at the same time. I'm glad you've been able to cope so far... I just hope you can get your parents to understand that as well.

(((NightFire)))

You aren't crazy, no. Of that, I am absolutely certain.

You have been dealt a very heavy load of physical (concussion) and emotional (the death of your twin sister) trauma. These two issues alone are HUGE!! I can't believe that your father is being so pushy and demanding that you get to work on your studies. I can't understand what his motivation is for being so rigid with you. Maybe he's trying to cheer you up with getting you to focus on your studies???

Do you work with a T for your severe clinical depression, OCD, anxiety, and ADD? I take it that you are on medications, to try to manage these issues? I hope that you do! I would recommend talking to him/her about this issue and get their professional opinion on what you can do or say to help your parents see that they need to back off you a little bit, but still show that they care about you.

If you aren't seeing a T...that's what you need to do asap. Gaining some tips/techniques on how to work through these emotions, especially as you are recovering from a TBI (traumatic brain injury). You can't get through all of this mess without the support and tips from others. You need as much support and consistency as you can get ~ because that's what helps us get into a stronger state of mind.

I had a TBI in 03/08, along with all of my mental issues as well. I recall how difficult basic things were for me...for a couple of years.I still require assistance every week to help me plan things and make certain that I'm going to doctor appointments, seeing my nurse, etc. I'm not saying that you require the same assistance ~ what I am saying is that you do need emotional support (and sometimes physical assistance). Perhaps if you were to present the issue this way to your parents they would be more empathetic and supportive towards you.

I hope so ~ you're in my thoughts!

Hugs NightFire! Some of the online schools have academic advisors that will make accommodations for those types of things, maybe give you some extra time. You have been going through a lot. I hope you do have someone in your corner to help you deal with all this.

Oh dear ***hugs***. You are NOT crazy. You have illness and injury issues! Of COURSE you're having trouble with the classwork! If I were in your shoes, I'd be talking to the appropriate people about getting extensions for both classes to give yourself time to recover, especially with the concussion.

Online courses are extremely difficult for me under the best of circumstances. I require the structure of the classroom to keep me on task.

You are not weak or crazy or any such thing. Not one bit.

I know that my institution has lots of support for students with extra issues. Please communicate with yours and see what kind of help is available.

Huggs to you ..

Yes, if you haven't yet, visit or speak with someone at the centre at the institution that deals with accommodation. I'm a university professor and we get requests all the time for students who need some form of accommodation for the course, and this is the very legitimate case you've described.

Also, if you think your parents aren't supportive or empathetic, it may be helpful to send them or give them some resources for family members of someone who suffers from depression. I did that with my community of support (Mom, Dad, brother, two best friends) and it turned out to bring us closer together.

RJ78