It's been a while

Ok, so I haven't posted on here in a while. Mostly because I was told that my posts were suicidal, and I felt that I was causing problems. But, I need to post right now, so here goes. I will try not to make this a triggering post. I just need to get this out. Some of you may know that I was supposed to see my therapist today. Well, I would be seeing her right now, but she is sick, and so our appointment got cancelled. I realize that this happens, but knowing that I would see her today is what has kept me alive for like the past month. Well, now I can't see her until 2 weeks from now, and this is really upsetting me. I feel like I don't have anything to hold on to. I feel like giving up. Please give me some advice here, I don't know what to do.

Thanks,
~Dreamer~

[b]<font color=blue> How very empty is my soul, it is a soul that feels no thrill, it is a soul that could easily kill...--Cake[b]<font color=blue>

That's disappointing. You have hung on to this date, and it gets post-poned again. I don't know if you could find someone else you can talk to in the mean time, which might help keep you hanging on. What I would suggest is that you write down the things you wanted to talk to her about today, and write down how you are feeling now. Do you have a way to send her a message? Email, snail mail, or dropping it off at her office? I think she needs to know that you were just hanging on to this and you really need to talk to her. Maybe she would find a way to work you in earlier, or call you or something. If nothing else, call a crisis line - at least you will be able to talk to somebody that way.

You're welcome to PM me, although I need to warn you I will be away from the computer Friday and Saturday, so I might not be able to reply very fast.

Have your classes started up yet? Concentrating on that might help too.

Hang in there!


<font color=green>"Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible" Carl Jung</font color=green>

dreamer sorry to hear this. i've been so extremely depressed for so long that i know how it is to be clinigng to one simple event in the future jsut to get through.

does your therapist know how badly you are feeling? is it possible that she might have someone to cover for her if this is an emergency?

if that is not an option have you tried calling a hotline or visiting an emergency room? you don't have to be immediately suicidal to call a hotline. they can offer advice or just talk for a while. i've been calling hotline nubmers frequently lately. like therapists, sometimes the conversations are helpful and occasionally they are frustrating. and you can always hang up.

it is my opinion that although there are several reasons why discussion of suicide is not permitted on this board, one of the most important ones is that if you are feeling that badly you should be seeking live help. s.i. is very serious and you should value it, and yourself, enough to actively seek some help. even call a friend or emergency room if necessary. the advice here is very helpful, but it not the type of professional help that is required for someone in a serious state of mind, nor is it immediate enough.

dreamer i am so glad to see you back and i hope you will keep posting and that this place can provide some comfort. i hope you can find some help there in dealing with the intense periods. see if you can let you're t know what a bad state you have been in and see if she has any suggestions, maybe she can fit you in sooner or can recommend an alternative until you can see her again.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

Seek out another therapist or go to your local behavioural health center for professional support during this critical time, you can be referred to someone to hold you over till your present therapist is available, there is always some sort of "stand in", even try your local hospital, and/or you county's mental health department.
Don't give up, you have the power within to make the impossible, possible. Make some phone calls to the various agencies I suggested if you can.
Take care now,
"darkeyes"

In giving advice seek to help, not please your friend
SOLON

Thank you all for your advice. I am probably just going to try to hang in there, I think I am seeing someone this weekend, which may help. I saw my shrink today, and because of my intense mood swings as well as my past, he thinks I may be manic-depressive, airing on the depressive side. He is starting me on a new med, and if it helps my mood, then that is what I have. I have thought that I might be manic-depressive for a long time, like since I was first diagnosed with depression, but none of the doctors would believe me, they just wrote it off as depression. Anyway, I just wanted to get on here really fast and thank you all. For rapunzel, yes I have started classes, and I am hoping that those will keep me busy enough over the next 2 weeks to hang in there. Anyway, I am going to go, need to be doing homework anyway. Thank you all again.

~Dreamer~

[b]<font color=blue> How very empty is my soul, it is a soul that feels no thrill, it is a soul that could easily kill...--Cake[b]<font color=blue>

ok I have given this adivce to many others on this fourm and some have said it works..

Start a journal, a discovery of what depersses you, write it down, jot every thought that is running by in your head, and keep it updataed daily..
Some even say that if they can use the computer it helps more, cause they can do other stuff while keeping a journal..

Journals are a very imporantant part of my life.. I have four of them.. one for severly depeerssed days, one for days when I feel nothing and I also have one that I let my boyfreind read when I do get very down..

Many differnt way to do do a journal.. and i even think this site offers a blog.. not sure how to use it, but I am sure someone woudl offer if they knew how

<font color=purple>The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
- G.K. Chesterton
<font color=purple>

If you would like to start a blog, the easiest way is to go to blogger.com and follow the instructions. Let me know if you need some help. I've been blogging for one year as of today - yes, it is my blog's birthday today. Keeping a journal (of whatever form) is a great suggestion.


<font color=green>"Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible" Carl Jung</font color=green>

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((D R E A M ER))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

LOOKS LIKE YOU GOT ALOT OF GOOD ADVICE, HANG IN THERE! IT WILL WORK OUT SOMEHOW

HUGSSSSSSSS

KRIS


Spread the joy of a positive 2004 remember random acts of kindness

If you think you have totally gave up, you haven't, because you are here!

You need to find a local support group for depression, they can help with the between times. I do this and it is incredible, maybe as good as therapy.

-Ariel

Whatever you can do,
Or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power, and magic, in it.
-Goethe