Am I too sensitive?

Do I just need to suck it up and move on? That's what I keep being told.

Even if I feel the slightest sense of being yelled at I just drop down into this pit of despair.

If I do something wrong and someone points it out. Or if I break a rule by accident. Or if somebody is unhappy or disappointed with me.

I'm not good at handling that stuff. I'm afraid of making people mad or upset because I feel like they will hurt me. Like when my dad gets mad he hits me. And when my mom gets mad she says the most hateful things that eat me alive. And when I get mad I hurt myself.

I just feel like I can't get anything right. I'm just a huge mistake. That I wasn't meant to be this way. I'm just an accident. And I don't feel like I can get things right.

Am I too sensitive?

Well, I can't say for sure given the information you have provided. I have to say this topic is a "sensitive" one for me because my mom always told me that I was being "too sensitive." She never could get that she was actually emotionally abusing me. (She has been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder with borderline tendencies. She has alway been very critical, and believe me, she is the epitome of too much sensitivity herself.)

I suspect you have just been worn down over the years and what folks say now makes it worse--or, in fact, people are saying abusive things. As I say, I can't say for sure.

Have you been in therapy? That could help you get a more professional opinion, plus help build up any self-esteem that's sagging.

If you'd like, then you could post again and tell us what specific things are setting you off.

Going to therapy just made it 100 times worse. I don't even know why she was aloud to talk to troubled people. She blamed everything on me and said my other personality was just satan and that it was not big deal. So ya that was unpleasant.

Both my dad and my brother tell me I'm too sensitive. A lot of things set me off, and I wind up viciously mad. These are the times when I feel violent towards everyone, up to and including myself. Thankfully, I rarely act on these feelings.

Personally, I'm not sure there even is such a thing as "too sensitive". Some people are more sensitive than others, yes, but that can be a good thing sometimes.

I think that people who go around telling other people they are too sensitive have a much bigger problem than that ... They aren't sensitive enough.

Maybe we should turn the tables on them and start telling them how cold, callous and insensitive they are.

This is a classic example of childhood abuse that lingers until the adult is willing to sit down and really listen to what has been said about his/her life and becomes able and strong to stand against the kind of sickness to which the little one was exposed.

It's the healing of the child within that brings us back to healthy lifestyle and feelings.

Please discuss your inner feelings with a psychiatrist who can help you understand and medicate you while you're in the process of healing. That's all you'll have to do and keep remembering as you remain your own parent of your little child within that you are a very special gift from God to the world and you deserve to be able to live that life with integrity and with the respect for yourself that enables you to live by your deepest inner principles.

You are fortunate in one sense that you know what happened and that you can overcome it. We often feel so sorry for those who were injured when they were so young that they are never able in live to overcome the tragedy of infant abuse.

Please talk to a specialist. One can help you so much and get you off to a good start on learning how to be your own parent and to realize the inadequacy of the parents you had.

You'll be fine with a little help. No disintegrating ever again over what somebody else says or does!

Start reading some good paperbacks such as Forgiving and Moving On
and Keep It Simple. Both are helpful in understanding having been reared
in a dysfunctional family. You'll want to meditate on the ideas in the paperbacks, I feel; and that can only help you to be a good parent to your little one within. So will Spirituality if you wish to read about that.

Take care of yourself and make the effort to get things started toward a new and stronger and much happier YOU!

Wow, what a kook as a therapist! There are decent therapists and psychiatrists around.

I should try that!
Come to think of it, that therapist is a prime example of "not sensitive enough".

Thank you. I have the feeling that was good advice. Unfortunately my understand of words has been a little foggy so the only part of that message I understood was the book recommendations. But thank you regardless

There is no such thing as being too sensitive. I am always upset when someone yells at me, or if I break a rule by accident too. I then either get sad and depressed, scared, or angry. It is tough to deal with, and I am not sure what advice to give you because I often feel the same way. I try to tell myself that the things that other people say do not matter, and I tell myself that I am doing the right thing because I believe in what I am doing, even if others disagree. And there are many psychologists who can be very helpful, while others (like your previous therapist) may not. I am always here if you need to talk!

Yeah, I agree, every time I've heard someone call someone else "too sensitive" it has been for dubious reasons. On the one hand, a person is bullying or being cold, trying to belittle the other; or the person being "too sensitive" perhaps suffers from a mental illness and the other person shows no empathy.

Whatever the case is, there's really no reason for either of your parents to treat you the way you describe! This is not your fault.

RJ

Your therapist said your other personality was Satan?! You need a different therapist, one with a clue, a real degree and who is soundly based in evidence based psychotherapy methodology.

I'm going to proffer an opinion: You sound to me like you could be dissociating. Do you have a diagnosis of dissociative identity disorder?

I don't even know what that is...

No you are not over sensitive. It is people who are insensitive. You don't need to suck it up. And you don't deserve to be treated this way. No one does.

Maybe I could say it another way, GirlOfManyFaces:

Nobody who is mature and has a good feeling about his little child within is ever going to be
insensitive. It isn't your fault. It's the people with whom you've been dealing
who need to be taught how to behave.

Thanks. That was easier to understand

dissociative identlty disorder is also known as multiple personality disorder. like when there are more than one mental person living inside one body. such as if a person has 3 seperate identites, like one personality who's a teenage, another who's an agressive person, and the last who's a super sweet middle aged person. this is just an example off the top of my head that i made up. i hope this helps, if not maybe check out the DID forum

--Sam

F### the people who yell at me, I have yet to find the perfect person. We all make mistakes and break rules, it's called being human.
The people who are so happy to point out your faults, are insecure little people.
If they really took a good look in the mirror, they would see they are a useless individual.

You aren't "too" sensitive - that's an opinion. You're just sensitive. I know how you feel. I react the same way and I literally cannot handle anything...

I had a bully for a therapist who got in my face a lot. This therapist you had was an asshole. Your family is wrong for judging you so harshly.

Here's something kinda amusing. The other day my brother told me I was too sensitive (like I haven't heard that before) and I asked him for his definition of "too sensitive". He said that it's when someone is more sensitive than the people around them. I basicly said that a lot of people are highly sensitive and I suggested that, by his definition, a lot of sensitive people in one place would be normal. He said that a lot of people are not as sensitive as me. I thought of everyone here, and I'm sorry, but I almost laughed out loud from the naivety of that statement. So I'm the only "over sensitive" person in the world, huh?

Anyway, I thought that was a bit amusing.