[unhappycamper463]

Woke up this morning and felt terrible. Drank some coffee in an attempt to get in a good workout. It didn't work. Just sped up my heart rate. Came home and just sat, staring at the wall. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Nothing is working. I feel flat all the time, I can't sleep at night. The pills, therapy and all the other **** doesn't change anything. I don't want to do it anymore. I'm so tired of feeling this way. I don't want to do it all over again tomorrow. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.

[shelleygone]

I wish I knew what to say to you, but I have nothing, as I'm going through those very same emotions. I completely understand you not wanting to get up tomorrow and do the same thing over again. I'm tired too, in this respect. Day after day, I go through the same (if not worse) routine, no change whatsoever. I wouldn't mind if my same routine was pleasant, but to wake up each day trying to find a way to fight suicidal thoughts, depression, confusion, and all that bad stuff, is overwhelming.

Like you, I don't want to do it anymore. And I've just about given up hope that things will ever be different than they are now. Why would I expect them to? After all, nothings changed in the last 7 years.

I don't know what to do either. I wish I could offer you some advice, some comfort, anything, but I just don't know what to say that will make things better for you or at least give you some inspiration or hope. I'm hoping that someone here can be of more help to you. I do want to say that you're not alone in feeling the way you do. It's easy to think this way, though, as there may not be anyone in your life that truly sympathizes with the way you're feeling or what you're going through, at least that's how it is for me. But, here, there are so many people that do get you. They get what it's like to be where we are.

Hope you feel better soon. There's a life waiting out there for you.

Originally Posted by unhappycamper463

Woke up this morning and felt terrible. Drank some coffee in an attempt to get in a good workout. It didn't work. Just sped up my heart rate. Came home and just sat, staring at the wall. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Nothing is working. I feel flat all the time, I can't sleep at night. The pills, therapy and all the other **** doesn't change anything. I don't want to do it anymore. I'm so tired of feeling this way. I don't want to do it all over again tomorrow. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.

[optimize990h]

unhappycamper463-I had a bad day today

I was not able to sleep. I am too afraid to try coffee because it causes the side effect of my antidepressant to start up and I start feeling anxious. I also did not exercise. Things are very slow, I can't admit they are not working. But it slow enough that I feel dull at times.

I know I don't want to start again tomorrow, but I have to. I know I must have some value and so do you. I may not having the exactly same day as you did, but at least you are able to post those thoughts. Me, I don't think I would even post my thoughts as you did. So, you helped in that way. Helped me process my thinking instead of burying it. So, thanks for sharing.
I hope things go better for you. I know the territory you wrote about.

[Pierro]

Unhappycamper. I'm so sorry that meds and the like are not working. Did you feel a little better after exercising?Maybe just a little? We have to keep on keeping on, as they say. I'm actually trying to convince myself about the exercise? I walk every day, come hail, rain, or shine.I think if I stop that I'l have nothing else. My advice Its so hard dragging yourself out of bed, bu we must, we have to. Don't we.

[bharani1008]

Please keep trying. Go back to the Dr that prescribes your medication and tell him that the meds aren't working. It took 2 years for my Dr. to get it right. At least here you find others who feel the same way you do. Just keep posting.

Caffeine plays a major role in insomnia, low-feeling tone, and other effects, especially if we're sensitive to it. While it does pick us up for a short while, it drops us much lower in feeling after the effects of caffeine wear off.

I think it's best to remove it entirely from our diets, frankly. (That, and
tea and chocolate; they all react very badly on people who are sensitive to them.)

Alcohol is another we should remove. It's a depressant and the after-effects are as strong as caffeine.

Please read http://www.caffeineallergy.com ruthwhalen That's the best article out there that I know of to convince one of the seriousness of caffeine allergy.

Take good care of yourself.