[Ohlostme]

My car air conditioning has been running cool, not cold lately. I took it in today -- it'll cost over $1,050 to fix! There's no way I can afford that. I've been unemployed for 6 months. So, I get to sweat. Here we are, in the Los Angeles area (a desert), in the middle of summer, and my car air conditioning is dying. Figures. I'm so disappointed, I'm crying. There's no point in getting mad. That won't fix the AC.

The thing is, it hits me in the self esteem. I keep thinking, if I had been any kind of a success (at anything ), I'd have money in the bank and be able to fix the air conditioing. (Hell, I'd be able to move out of this miserable oven, as I so desperately want!)

So tiresome... Amazing how life never gets any better. It'll get worse, oh yes! But never better.

[heartspace]

It never rains but it poors, huh? Luck is bound to come your way soon.

[Sujin]

(((((Ohlostme)))))

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time.

Is the air conditioner the only thing that is wrong with your car? I ask because that seems like an awful lot of money for just the air to be fixed. I know living expenses in California are high, but that's outrageous to charge that much! I recently had the same problem with my car, it was blowing cool air and then eventually warm air. I took it to the garage and they charged about $100 dollars. I checked around just about everywhere near where I live, and the rate was the same ($100). The air conditioner may just need freon, I'm not sure. It's a good idea to get a second or even third opinion (or more!)

It's strange how some things can lead us down the path to thinking about other things, it's kind of like if one thing goes wrong in our lives it snowballs into other parts of our lives (and our thinking). I just want to say that I hope things get better for you. I really think they will.

Best Wishes,
Sujin

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((( Ohlostme ))))))))))))))

(((((((((ohlostme))))))))))
everyone has struggles. Your a significant person.

[PasDeDeux]

(((( OHLOSTME)))))) I am so sorry I get so fed up with heat and know you must be scared. I asked my husband what he thought of the price he said get a second opinion but if a compressor is needed and so on and the type of car you have it could be a fair price. Can you take it somewhere else and see if they can just hit it with coolant like freon? I have a leak in my home AC but get almost a summer of air from a fill of just freon. Someday I need to geta new unit. I would be in a panic if I were in your place. I have heat phobia

Ohlostme, i understand where your at emotionally right now.

i agree with everyone esle, get a second, third, fouth etc opinion, that is an extreme amount of money, it would be cheaper to buy another car! if it turns out to be that expensive, try other alternatives...you can buy car fans that plug into your cigarette lighter that are good, have that and the cool air from the broken air-con blowing and you should be fine.

dont stress about it, and try not to let it upset you. these type of things are sent to try us and test our patience and perseverance, keep at it.

try not to let it make you doubt yourself. you are a success from the posts ive read from you here, just because you have not much money doesnt mean you arent succesful. personally i think you are very successful menatlly, and that is the best form of success, not material things.

stay strong and keep believeing that tomorows another day, and witht hat could bring a little ray of sunshine.

[Ohlostme]

Thanks, guys. Yes, I supposed I should get other estimates. I do need a compressor, though (they said), and I have hose leaks, etc. So, it won't be cheap. I was hired to a new job but haven't been able to start yet. (The supervisor was out sick until yesterday. Now she needs to get HR's ok to hire me, before I can start).

I woke up this morning so sad to still be stuck here. Every morning it's such a rude awakening, to find myself still here. I feel like such a failure for not taking better care of myself (being able to move when I want/need to). I like to think I have such a high IQ, and so many skills/talents, so much experience in so many areas and so much ambition, but it's done me no good. As I've told my friends, I work harder for less effect than anyone I know. REALLY hard on the self esteem. (I feel like a hamster running around in a little wheel, in my cage - I expend huge amounts of energy and get exactly nowhere)

Meanwhile, it's going to be 95 degrees today. Gawd...

[devoradora]

Things do get better. You just have to ride the roller coaster for a while. I am the same age as you are. I should have something to show for myself, but I really don't. My father passed away (my best friend) in April of this year and inherited his 2000 Mazda 626 car.

I got laid off from my job last March 2005 and just have not been able to find a job that I like. It's harder to sell yourself when you get older and have low self esteem. I had to take 10,000 out of my 20,000 IRA account to live on recently. I will have to pay a pretty penny for that come tax time.

Sometimes, you have to do what you have to do to survive. My father's passing has hit me big time and I have been in a deep depression. I feel that I will snap out of it. I just hope it's sooner than later.

[Ohlostme]

Wow, devoradora, you're so much luckier than me, in so many ways. You had a father you knew and who was your best friend. I never met my father. You have an IRA with money in it. I have nothing.

Sure, you're in a deep depression. Your father died only 4 months ago. Give yourself time to grieve. What I've read said that the process of grief takes a year (there are stages). Don't push yourself or demand too much from yourself during that time. It took me quite a while to be able to talk about my family's deaths (they all died within 9 months), and I didn't even like them that much. But I felt so abandoned (again). It hit me hard, but sort of sneaked up on me. At the time I actually felt shocked, but sort of relieved that they were gone. It was a complete mystery to me why I couldn't talk about my mother's death, for a few years afterward, without crying. I didn't even like her! But there were issues. They were deep down, but they were there. I can talk about her now, but, during the holidays I really feel the absence of family.

Anyway, as for my disappointment issue -- I've always had such low self esteem and not living up to my expectations of myself has always been an issue for me. I've tried. Damned hard. But you can only do what you can do. I've known people who put out MUCH less effort than I have, with fewer brains or skills, and I've seen them succeed. I can only assume karma has something to do with it. Some people were just meant to have certain things, and others weren't, no matter how hard we work. Sigh. If I could just accept that and stop striving for things, I'd probably feel much better. (It's that old "should" bugaboo -- "I should have this," "I should be at this point in my life by this age," etc.) Gets me every time.

Hang in there.