[noprogress]

I've been trying to sort out my problems secretly by myself for many years now and I'm finally beginning to accept that I'm not getting anywhere. I'm not even sure what my main problem is, whether it's depression or whether it's chronic guilt or shame. On a day to day basis I tend to feel guilt at least half the time but I also have very little motivation or energy to do much productive activity. I used to write a lot, trying to work out why I felt so much guilt and sometimes I'd get relief but it has always come back as bad as ever. These days I just try to relax and resolve the guilt in my mind and it seems a bit more effective but it still always comes back. I think the constant guilt may actually be the cause of my depression rather than the other way around. The reason I think that is because guilt is the predominant feeling I experience every day and it seems to prevent me doing almost anything that I feel like doing.

Anyway the bottom line is, I just can't manage this guilt anymore. I've tried just about everything I know to resolve it and it's got me nowhere. Of course getting help would seem like the obvious solution but I feel too ****** to even go outside most of the time these days, never mind go and tell a stranger my problems. It just seems like a vicious circle I can't escape. I feel like I need to resolve my feelings of guilt somewhat to actually have the confidence to go and seek help but obviously it never really gets any better. I just don't know how I'm ever going to deal with this.
I don't know if anyone here can help me but I suppose it's worth a try. Thanks for reading.

[Lou8282]

I'm sorry for your struggles. I wonder if maybe telephone counselling is an option? It could at least get you through, give you someone to talk to, until you can leave the house and see a professional and have some face to face appointments. Just a thought.

[optimize990h]

Hello, noprogress.



I don't know the exact details of your concerns, but if you have the means to work with a compatible therapist, it's the best option. One should have more than one option available so one does not rely any single option to deal with their mental health issues.

Here at PC and other self help groups, there are the support of members who have gone through similar experiences. Just remember no one option works for everyone.

Sometimes, it is just not one particular issue that is the major source of your problem(s). Perhaps one thing to investigate to determine whether it is appropriate for you is a 12 step program Emotions Anonymous. Apparently, it is not as popular as in the past, but the members at those groups are valuable resources who may be able to act as your mentors to begin the healing you require. Good luck in your future ventures and do not be afraid to return or keep posting here at PC for additional support and feedback.

[bharani1008]

For me the predominant feeling was shame. It completely overwhelmed me. I couldn't talk to anyone. I could barely leave my room. There was also huge paranoia because I was sure that everyone could see how shameful I was. Plus I was scared to death of a future full of this pain. Then I finally went to see a psychiatrist and learned that EVERY one of those feelings stemmed from depression and the wonky chemicals in my brain. He worked and worked for 2 years to find the right mix of medicine for me and now I'm sooo much better. I never had therapy but many people on this forum say that it helped them so much.
I guess what I'm saying is that you may not need to suffer so much. There may be an answer for you. I never would have been able to get over this by myself. I think it's very very difficult to do alone. Please find the energy to see someone or call a help line. There's hope.
Keep posting here and read others stories so you can know you're not alone
Good Luck

[Fuzzybear]