still so many problems

i just feel really rotten today and yesterday was really tough too.

i heard from work again last week, again with the stupid newsletter stuff, this time i did it over the weekend and sent it so i've heard again from them all sorts of stupid chatty stuff.

all my anxiety of life is back. i slept ok last night but i'm still just drained today. anxiety and depression and things still seem to be getting worse instead of better. i have another appt in 2 days so that will get me through this week.

it is just so completely draining having to take this still a day at a time, an hour at a time, i thought by now it would at least be a little bit easier. still don't hear from people, still feel alone and isolated, it is getting harder and harder for me to call people because the rejection hurts more and more.

i just want to get to a point where i am functional again. right now i feel as if i might as well be bedridden in a hospital, let them put me in a facility and feed me every day with the tv on.

i really want to work past this it is just so hard.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

Hi,

Your post have strike me. I would gladly change places with you if I could without thinking twice. You feel isolated and alone and i have too many people around me.

Rejection is very hard to deal with. It hurt in so many ways. I'm sorry that this has happened to you. At least you have people in here to have a contact with. I know it's not the same that if it was people right there in your life, people you can see and touch. But the feeling is there. The feeling that somewhere in this world some people cares for you, are kind to you, think that you are important, like to be friend with you and if you are not around, will surely miss you. Because they need you as much as you need them and because kindness and understanding is greatly appreciated on a computer as well as if the person was standing right beside you. Maybe I'm just saying anything here. What I really want to tell you is that you are touching people right here, right now. I have always thought that I was lucky to have a computer.

These words I'm saying are said with friendship and love. I sincerelly hope that you will feel better soon. Take good care and don't loose hope.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((Dexter))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

with friendship and love
nightdream

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Dexter}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I know, Hun, I know... I wish I could give you your hugs in person. Sometimes you just need someone with skin on close to you.

Hang in there. Your appointment date is almost here. Remember, it just takes time and you have a lot of it these days. Try to relax as much as possible. Give yourself "permission" to be sick, because that's what it is; an illness. You're in the process of treating that illness and like anything else, it takes time for the meds to work.

Have you tried doing some imagery? Go to a place in your mind where things are they way you want them or to a serene place that you would enjoy just "Being."

If none of this works, then picture a matronly old broad fixing us a tasty snack with your choice of drink and just sitting and talking, and most likely being silly... oh, and in your dream, would you picture me in an electric wheel chair? LOL Sure wish I had one!


"It's not what you gather, but what you scatter that tells what kind of life you have lived."

thank you everyone... i've been back in bed. not the best thing but today just feels so bad that its the only way to take a bit of the pain away.

i haven't even dressed yet and i shower and dress every day usually, even when i have a cold or flu, because it makes me feel better. i'm probably heading for the shower after posting here for awhile. if i don't then that's a big step backward and i at least have to try to keep status quo. i just wish that being awake was not so painful. it is really hard to deal with

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

I am sorry dexter, I wish I had some words that would help. I'll just have to send you some {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Take good care,
Fuzzy xx

Hi Dexter

I'm like you, so sick and tired of all this and feeling there is nothing to look forward to, but as SundaysChild says "allow yourself to be ill, and remember it takes time, (not easy) and meds take a while. As bad as I feel right now, I think this is encouraging. I think in some ways depression has helped me to stop behavior that makes medepressed. Keep posting, it helps.

the hugs help... i've been missing that in my real life. not the same in cyberspace but a step in the right direction.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

Hi, KittyKat, and welcome to the board!

Hey... I don't think Dexter is listening... Still being a "critical parent" to himself.






"It's not what you gather, but what you scatter that tells what kind of life you have lived."

I just love everybody's welcomes. Very uplifting.

Feeling any better, Dexter? {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Dex}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}


"It's not what you gather, but what you scatter that tells what kind of life you have lived."

sorry

this whole day has been full of hurt.

i'm taking my evening meds now and just want to go to sleep.

something has got to get better

thanks everyone

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>