[volatile]

I have never felt this way. Everything from my past is coming back. All the bad feelings I had growing up, in school, being a kid..... I can't take this. And how my life has ended up I don't know how much longer I can take this!! I tried forever to forget what happened to me as a kid, forget how I was treated and subsequently destroyed. I tried to rise above it but I never could! There is too much pain... I'm 24 and I'm still a broken person and I HATE IT. I ****ing hate that those people did this to me!!!! They wanted this to happen, they wanted to destroy the little genius girl and they succeeded. I was never suppose to achieve at anything. I'm worthless and I disgust myself but nothing was ever meant to be. I was never suppose to achieve any of my dreams. I'm never going to have anything or be anyone. it just hurts. and it always hurts. i don't think it will ever stop hurting. i just wish the suffering would stop already but everyday it gets worse. I know my life was destroyed before it ever started and i can't escape that reality. No one cared how their actions would affect me as a child. no one cared at all. i still feel like no one cares... I really just wish i were dead.

[mazing]

Thinking of you. I'm so sorry to hear what you have been through - no child should ever need to go through that kind of pain. But there are people here who care. Lean on the forums for a while if you need to.

No-one is worthless. No one is so broken that the pieces can't be put back together. We all have struggles, some more than others, and they aren't easy to overcome but in time you can begin to pick up the pieces again. Don't give up.

Do you have anyone you can talk to? A therapist or close friend? Sometimes having someone to talk to and just venting can help with some of the hard times. It is almost impossible to forget but through confronting it, as painful and difficult as it is it can help you to begin to move forward.

I am thinking of you. Also, if you ever want to chat please feel free to contact me. I can never promise to have all of the answers but am happy to listen, and sometimes that can help. Especially if you are feeling alone.

Take care

[manwithnofriends]

maybe you can tell us a bit more about yourself? You won't be judged here, any "judgmental" posts will be reported and deleted.

[gayleggg]

It sounds like you were mistreated by adults and children alike. If this is so, then I don't blame for having so much pain. I would suggest a counselor to help you come to terms with all this bottled up pain and help you find the way to a better life without so much pain.

Also, I agree, manwithnofriends, post on here more to get the pain out and get support here. It is a very caring site. May you find peace soon. Let me know if I can help, just PM me.

[Fuzzybear]

[Pierro]

It would be in your best interest to talk to somebody a friend or a therapist. You tried going it alone but it has not worked out. You have to remember to forget. Your wrenching pain has come through in your post and I wish that I could help you in some way. People are here for you, keep posting. Best Wishes.

[don964964]

I send hugs an love to you

your not worthless . you are very intelligent .

you will succeed in life , you will heal

24 ... ahh there is so much more ... good to come in life for you