[GenCat]

I am really struggling to not take more sleeping pills and just pass out. I want to not wake up for a week. I want to take the easy way out and just slip away...

[Maria38Divine]

Gen,

Don't you dare!!...!! C'mon, keep talking to us. Remember: you are a valuable, wonderful human being. We love you. Your brain is just in a muddle right now. You'll get over this hump.

That's not you talking Gen, it's the depression.
I find you to be a kind reasonable person on these forums and you're important to me.

Give yourself some TLC....do something you love (for me it's a ridiculously long bath with a glass of wine) go online and play some mind-numbing games. Retail therapy.

Remember the butterfly effect. You are here for a reason that you're not allowed to know about.

Hugs, and keep venting...

~ Listen to the rain. Feel the touch of tears that fall, they won't fall forever. All things come, all things go. ~

[GenCat]

I doubled my dose to sleep. But I'm still awake and typing fine.

Originally Posted by GenCat

I doubled my dose to sleep. But I'm still awake and typing fine.

Take a little nap.
Lie down for ten minutes.

[Nammu]

When I'm struggling with that feeling I sometimes lie down with soft music and just concentrate on; one breath in, one breath out. When a bunch of invasive thoughts evade in my head I just go back to; one breath in, one breath out.

This won't solve any thing and it's not a cure but I usually feel better even when I don't fall asleep.

[Altered Moment]

GenCat remember what happened last time you doubled your dose? You had a blackout. I am serious some people get out of bed in the middle of the night and go grocery shopping and have no memory of it. Or they get up and cook a full meal, then in the morning have no memory of it and wonder why the kitchen is all dirty. Ambien is known to cause this in some people.

[GenCat]

Originally Posted by zinco14532323

GenCat remember what happened last time you doubled your dose? You had a blackout. I am serious some people get out of bed in the middle of the night and go grocery shopping and have no memory of it. Or they get up and cook a full meal, then in the morning have no memory of it and wonder why the kitchen is all dirty. Ambien is known to cause this in some people.

Yes well I took 3 and i cant go to sleep. And then o had to go out in public so here I am.

Shut off your computer now. It's the best thing for you.

You won't be able to sleep unless you lie in the dark...Give it a try.

[GenCat]

Originally Posted by sophiesmom

Shut off your computer now. It's the best thing for you.

You won't be able to sleep unless you lie in the dark...Give it a try.

Tried sleeping. And then my mom tells me we have to go. So I'm out and about. I feel fine maybe alittle flowy and light.

Tell your mom about the pills so she can keep an eye on you.

And please don't do this again. I worry for you.

[GenCat]

I won't tell her becuase she will take them away and won't let me take anymore. And I can't just stop suddenly.

[GenCat]

I will wait for my Pdoc and tell him what's been going on. I just don't see how I can have amnesia takings 1 and two but i take three and nothing can't even fall asleep.

[Nammu]

Is there anyone you trust enough to call and talk to? Taking too much medicine is a silent way to ask for help when a person feels unable to ask directly or has asked directly but wasn't heard. Often the consequences of unintended OD is not the kind of help one really wants. It can be SI behavior too.

[Altered Moment]

Well I have also taken three in the past with no ill affect but the other night you did have a weird affect.

[GenCat]

Originally Posted by sidestepper

Often the consequences of unintended OD is not the kind of help one really wants. It can be SI behavior too.

Maybe I was trying to sleep and not kill myself?

It's very easy to go from 2 to 3 to 4.

The recommended dosage is there for a reason and unless you are a medical professional, you should follow what they say.

If you do or say anything strange, you won't remember it anyway, and you hated that last time. Did you know that you wrote this?:

"Darkess comes with strong forcesors of old building light. Each end light shows throuh to the darkest sides of those who need to be shown light"

We're just trying to help you, here.

I strongly suggest you tell your mom and ask her to give you the correct dosage at night.

[GenCat]

Yes i remember EVERYTHING I did today, that's why I can spell and have a proper conversation.

[Altered Moment]

I don't think you noticed the quote that you wrote today. A lot of misspelling. A rather deep quote.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Well good luck to you, then, my dear.

Hugs.

Sweetie, nobody is calling you a liar. We are all trying to support you, but we're on the other side of the screen and there's only so much we can do.....

If you are feeling suicidal, call the suicide prevention hotline....They can help you more than I can.

[Altered Moment]

GenCat personally I am not that concerned that you took three or four ambien. I myself in a past life used to take massive quantities of many different very powerful drugs including alcohol which is a very powerful drug. I did it to self medicate for this disease and to cope with life. The human body and mind can take a lot. I am sure you will be fine.

My concern is your proclivity to "Want to take more pills" as the title of your post says. What is going to happen when you run out of ambien and can't get the script refilled. If it was me in my old life I would start looking for something else to cope. Some other substance. Its a slippery slope. It works for awhile but ends up causing many more problems. I know exactly how it feels and where you are at. It is very easy to reach for the pill bottle to escape. Talk to your pdoc and your T. Maybe your pdoc can address your issues of anxiety and sleep problems. I take a klonopin in the morning and a klonopin and remeron at night to sleep. I have to take the klonopin exactly as prescribed or else I will abuse it. Then I will run out and have to go through withdrawals and wait until I can get the script filled again. I take it as prescribed and it works great.

[waggiedog]

Hi darling. Yes, gotta agree with what someone else said, be careful as it's not long before you need more and more meds to have the desired effect. I KNOW because I've been there. I still go there sometimes but then have to haul myself back again. I totally UNDERSTAND how you would love to be ''out of it'', I feel the same way. Just be very careful hun, reality tends to bite when you least expect it to. Take care, LOVE and HUGS. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[Nammu]

Please don't misunderstand I did not say you were suicidal, SI is self injury. Its often from a desire to control things around us and I would never presume to say how you are feeling. I'm only saying these are possible.

Like others here I'm concerned about that statement that you want to take more because you have not gotten the outcome you desire. Sleep. I've known people who have done just that and the outcome was unintended OD. The consequences were a long hospitalization, supervised medication and the loss of trust. One person I'm thinking of she had taken exactly the same amounts before with no problem, then for what ever reason that one time it became an OD.

The lack of sleep is something many of us here have struggled with, it's draining and it robs us of the ability to see clearly and make good choices.

[GenCat]

After reading all these lovely comments, I have been triggered and will probably relapse tonight.