[jaeann]

Hey everyone. I've come here out of pure desperation. I feel like I have no one that I can talk to. I mean, I have friends & family but I don't feel like I can tell them things without being judged. & plus, I don't want to scare them.

I've been feeling very depressed, unmotivated, and hopeless lately. Much more so than I ever have before. & I want help.

I'm afraid that if I ask for help, or to see a counselor, then people will think that I just want attention. I'm afraid that if I tell anyone about my SI, they'll think the same thing.

I guess, what I'm asking for is advice on how to handle this situation. I'm scared to admit the truth to my family. They're going through a lot of stress right now & I don't want to be a burden. Please help me! I'd appreciate any advice.

Thank you.

hi and welcome to PC.........i am so sorry that you are having trouble right now. you've come to a good place to get support and find people to listen and talk to you. i need a bit more info and am going to ask you "20" questions.

how old are you? do you live at home with your family? is there anyone in your family that you feel close enough to confide in? an aunt or someone a bit removed from your family's home?

if you don't have anyone else and you are younger, you may have to speak to your parents. if you feel that you need help, i believe they will understand. depression is just like kidney disease or cancer. it's an illness and i am sure that your parents would want to find help for you. i definitely would want you to seek help if you are upset enough to cut......

if you are in school, are there counselors there? or a trusted teacher? someone IRL that knows your family and might help you talk to them?

i don't know if i've been very much help, but please keep me updated. you will find a lot of support here......xoxox pat

[jaeann]

Thanks for replying. I'm 17 years old & the only person person I'm really close with in my family is my mom. I've tried to tell her about my feelings (not about my cutting though) & she said she'd take me to see a counselor but she hasn't. She & my dad are going through a divorce now & it's a hard time for her.

There's not really any teachers that I feel very comfortable with & even if I did, I just don't know where to start. I don't know how to express how I feel without sounding like a melodramatic teenager. I'm afraid that is what everyone will think, like, not taking me seriously. You know what I mean? Maybe its irrational, I don't know.

Thanks again for responding, it helped more than you know.

[jacq10]

((((((((((((((jaeann)))))))))))))
I'm glad you've made your way here, it really is a good place to come for support.
I'm sorry things are so bad right now ... and if it makes a different i was in a very similar situation last year with parents separating and struggling with depression and SI(i'm 18). So i understand when you say you're scared people won't take you seriously. Its a really good thing that you're able to confide in your mom even just a little bit, but if she doesn't pursue in finding you someone to talk to you can go and do that on your own. I'm assuming you're in school, and if thats the case then they have counsellor's there that you can go in and talk to. I did that and it turned out to be the best thing for me.
Feel free to message me if you have and questions, or just want someone to talk to.
Take good care,
Jacqueline

[bipolar_bear]

Welcome to PC jaeann. It is nice of you to put your mothers problems ahead of yours but maybe you could ask her again if you could go see someone. I am guessing that she may have forgotten with how hectic her own life is. But that doesn't mean she doesn't want to help. SI is a very difficult thing to stop on your own and is usually an indication there is more going on inside. Please try and get some help as it tends to get more addictive over time. Stay safe.

[(JD)]

Only those who don't understand would suggest you "just" want attention. You NEED attention, imo, of the good kind. The stress you are experiencing is partly from the family; why should your reaction require less attention then their reactions (for which you are trying to adjust?) They need to also consider how you need help and they need to be a part of the solution.

Sometimes we have to speak up for ourselves, for our own best interest. Asking a counselor for assistance in coping with this stress is a good, adult thing to do. I hope you can find that inner strength to ask for it.

TC!

[pinewarbler]

I totally know the feeling of not wanting to scare other people, jaeann. I guess I shouldn't complain because I have some really supportive friends, but they're busy people with a lot going on, and I just feel really guilty when I throw myself at them.

I guess that's why counselors are good - you know they won't get sick of you, because it's their job to listen, and you can't feel guilty about taking up their time. :-)