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  #1  
Old Aug 18, 2014, 09:34 PM
The Fox & the Hound The Fox & the Hound is offline
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I can't stop regretting things. If I do one thing, I regret the other. If I do something, even slightly wrong, I regret it ,& takes me forever to get over it. Now, I'm just doing nothing, so I don't regret anything. It's horrible. It is just making me more depressed.

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  #2  
Old Aug 18, 2014, 10:43 PM
Anonymous100125
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I'm sorry. It must feel lousy to regret like that. I don't exactly feel regret over things...I tend to feel guilty. If I do one thing instead of another I feel guilty. In a way, it is regret I feel.
  #3  
Old Aug 18, 2014, 10:49 PM
The Fox & the Hound The Fox & the Hound is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Rags View Post
I'm sorry. It must feel lousy to regret like that. I don't exactly feel regret over things...I tend to feel guilty. If I do one thing instead of another I feel guilty. In a way, it is regret I feel.
I feel guiltily too
  #4  
Old Aug 18, 2014, 11:20 PM
Anonymous100125
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Well, I'm always hearing that guilt and regret can be symptoms of depression. To me, it feels more like an obsessive thing.
  #5  
Old Aug 19, 2014, 10:02 AM
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Thanks for this!
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  #6  
Old Aug 20, 2014, 03:19 AM
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I regret/feel guilty about a great many things and at times it can be quite difficult. It is depressing, obsessive, and causes anxiety. One thing to remember is that decisions in the past were often made with the only information available to you at that time. It is not until later when you are presented with new information that you regret the decision. Which only proves that you made the best possible decision you could at the the time, so there is point in regretting it later. It serves no purpose.

Life is full of wrong decisions and instead of regretting them you should study them and learn from them. You will actually gain confidence about your future this way.
Thanks for this!
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  #7  
Old Aug 20, 2014, 03:32 AM
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Originally Posted by Ripose View Post
One thing to remember is that decisions in the past were often made with the only information available to you at that time. It is not until later when you are presented with new information that you regret the decision. Which only proves that you made the best possible decision you could at the the time, so there is point in regretting it later. It serves no purpose.
Really appreciate this thought; thanks for posting
  #8  
Old Aug 20, 2014, 10:04 AM
The Fox & the Hound The Fox & the Hound is offline
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I try to not regret things, but it always happens. I learn from them. But I regret so many things.
  #9  
Old Aug 20, 2014, 03:07 PM
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The Fox & The Hound, have you asked your Dr. if there is a medication that would help with this?

I personally found Ativan helpful.
  #10  
Old Aug 20, 2014, 03:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Fox & the Hound View Post
I try to not regret things, but it always happens. I learn from them. But I regret so many things.
Note the self-imposed moniker that I use on this site...it was one that I came up with after much thought. I used to think along the lines that it is better to regret something you have done than to regret something that you haven't done...however, as I've aged, I've come to regret many things that I've done. In my particular instance, I don't deal with the regrets well at all; my suggestion would be to consider your decisions carefully and think for yourself. I've learned that many of my regrets are the result of me following what other people thought would be good for me rather than doing what I knew was good for me. Hope that makes sense, and I hope that you can move on...
  #11  
Old Aug 20, 2014, 10:09 PM
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I regret things all the time. Basically I'm chained to indecision. I always worry about making the wrong decision and usually I do make the wrong decision looking back. I hear what you're saying.
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  #12  
Old Aug 21, 2014, 10:23 AM
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There is a difference between shame and guilt. Shame is when you internalize guilt and regret and feel it makes you defective as a person.

There is that saying from "Dune" - "Fear is the mind killer." But I think shame is just as bad.
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  #13  
Old Aug 21, 2014, 10:25 AM
regretful regretful is offline
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Originally Posted by zinco14532323 View Post
There is a difference between shame and guilt. Shame is when you internalize guilt and regret and feel it makes you defective as a person.

There is that saying from "Dune" - "Fear is the mind killer." But I think shame is just as bad.
That's a great quote...it applies to me, 100%...fear is killing me, and so is the shame...
  #14  
Old Aug 21, 2014, 10:31 AM
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Fear of the future and shame of the past. Eats me up to sometimes. Much more the fear of the future currently. That's why one day at a time and in the moment is so powerful, but hard to do.

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The "paradox" is only a conflict between reality and your feeling of what reality "ought to be." -- Richard Feynman

Major Depressive Disorder
Anxiety Disorder with some paranoid delusions thrown in for fun.
Recovering Alcoholic and Addict
Possibly on low end of bi polar spectrum...trying to decide.

Male, 50

Fetzima 80mg
Lamictal 100mg
Remeron 30mg for sleep
Klonopin .5mg twice a day, cutting this back
  #15  
Old Aug 23, 2014, 08:57 AM
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eskielover eskielover is offline
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There are definktely things in my life that I regret happening...but I don't dwell on them. I analyze what happened & why....process that into what did i learn from that?...what could i learn so i don't do the same or simular thing in the future?...Determine if there is something i need to resolve any peraonal issues or any action i might possibly need to do ....grieve a little of what I possibly lost from what happened....then I

GET ON WITH MY LIFE!!!!

Sometimes the analysis takes awhile if it was a complicated situation that occured....but I would always fight with my mother or H & totally forget what the fight was about as soon as it was over while my mother would hold onto it for weeks.

It has been suggested that i am very compartmentalized...& basically live in the moment as it always seemed like each moment takes so much thought that I couldn't function with anything else piled on the moment. That moment takes into consideration things i learned from the past but limited to ONLY what I learned.

Have found only one trauma that got triggered annually but as the years are passing that is lessening & even more with good processing of what happened.

I had always lived that way but found out it's actually a DBT skill called radical acceptance for what something is if we can't do anything more about the issue with what we know or can do for the time being.

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