[emily_post2010]

I wonder if depression can be caused by feeling there is no reward to what you are doing or no point to what you are doing. I have noticed that if I set up a good system for rewarding myself for what I do, I feel a lot better. If I tell myself I did a good job, jump up and down with glee for doing something, or check off a small task in my planner, I feel like I have motivation and am happy.

Currently, I tend to be depressed simply in this way: not being motivated, feeling unfocused, feeling spacey, etc. I tend to tell myself there is no point in doing things. It seems if I know I'll be rewarded in some way, a check mark, a treat, something of that nature, I feel better. I don't feel better just relaxing. When I "just relax" lately, I tend to waste long periods of time in front of the TV or playing Solitaire.

Anyway, this seems to be an interesting type of depression. I perceive either negative consequences or nothing good coming of something I am about to do. I feel like I simply need to train myself to think positively about tasks. It seems like rewarding myself for everything is one piece of the puzzle.

[(JD)]

IMO you certainly have said this well. While not being noticed for something can cause us to become <font color=blue>blue</font color=blue> perhaps it takes the idea that there's no hope or reward for doing good to begin the downward spiral, and brain chemical changes, to create true depression. (?)

Doing what we can, the best we can, and recognizing that fact is a good defense of mental health. "Looters" will try to say you are being self centered by congratulating yourself for good work... those of us who know better know it's just good!

<font color=purple> May you continue to find good things to do, and better things to reward yourself with!

<font color=blue> meditation is a true way to connect to the Source </font color=blue>

[dexter]

I also think it is EXTREMELY positive that the "rewards" you are seeking are coming from within yourself. i.e. not relying on others to tell you you've done a good job etc.

Like sky said there are a lot of looters out there who have only their own interests and baggage at heart. Which is not to say that there aren't good people out there too who can give you satisfaction for yourself. But ALWAYS primarily I believe it has to come from within. Anything others add to reward you is important and supportive and helpful but if you can't find it within your self first, nothing anyone else says is going to help.

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-- http://www.idexter.com

[mj14]

emily, my therapist is always reminding my to give myself credit and/or reward myself for good things. My depression has a lot of basis in feelings of worthlessness, and anything to remind myself that I have accomplished something helps alleviate that feeling. And I think in general, depression causes us to see everything as negative, and those rewards can inject a little positive, and lift the curtain a bit.

Thanks for your insight.
mj

[krzyk101]

HELLO, Emily

Awhile back I decided to reward my self in the ways you expressed. I found a 7 day colorful "to do" kit (probubly intended for a child, but I don't care) It had blank spaces to list things with boxes next to it. Along with it came "happy smilie face stickers" to put in the box of the day of the week.

So I started simple, "Took a Shower" "did Dishes" and daily things that most people do not find having to put extra effort into doing. When I would do one of these things, I would get a sticker in each box of the thing I did.

My T said it was very positive for me, I have stopped awhile back, now she urges me to start a reward system like that back up again, as it does help.

Keep rewarding yourself for your extra effort
You deserve it.

Take Care,
Kris

If you think you have totally gave up, you haven't, because you are here!

[SeptemberMorn]

Excuse me... but is this "Ellie"? I associate "Emily Post" to a lost aquaintance of mine... and some others here, too, I might add.






<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[dexter]

>> I found a 7 day colorful "to do" kit (probubly intended for a child, but I don't care) It had blank spaces to list things with boxes next to it. Along with it came "happy smilie face stickers" to put in the box of the day of the week.

I like that idea a lot! I used to love to get boxes of stickers that teachers used to have... the gold stars, pumpkins for halloween, etc. No reason that joy shouldn't come into play now as part of a reward system.

(This, of course, speaking as someone with a ton of brand new star wars toys and a kinex rollercoaster in my den... I say that I buy them as "collectibles" but as soon as I get home I yank them out of the boxes and play with them )

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-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

[emily_post2010]

Hi SeptemberMorn,

This is Ellie.

[SeptemberMorn]

Ellie! Good to see you again! YeeeeHaaaaaaaaaaa!!





<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[emily_post2010]

I'm glad to see you too. And happy to see you are a Grand Poobah. I'm glad you like this board.

[atrester]

I sure am glad to hearI am not the only one who doesn't function easily like it seems everyone else does. It is a struggle to do everything and I feel like such a lazy person. I get bogged down with thoughts and frustrationsand just trying to figure out how to get through the day then I have done NOTHING inthe end to care for the house or myself.

I do something like this reward thing...that is that I write EVERYTHING I do ona list even if I already did it just to cross it off. I have to do lists but there are so many things I do that aren't onit. SO I write them on to cross them off. It does work for me. Then also at the end of the day when DH asks what I did all day I do have something to show for myself.