[bubbles00]

I feel like such a burden to the world. I feel so pathetic and useless. I’m and insult to humanity. Why do I even exist? I have no purpose. I just can never seem to satisfy anybody.

I also can’t stop crying. I can’t get out of bed. I can’t concentrate on reading anything (have to read everything 10+ times to make sense out of it or tell people to talk slowly).

I just hate myself a lot. I want to hurt myself but I’m so tired out of my mind to get up and do something. I feel like I’m such a burden to people. I feel like crying all the time. It’s hard for me to even hold back my tears (and it doesn’t even matter where I am; I just start crying). I cry myself to sleep basically every night. I feel so ******.

I’m so ashamed of who I am. Sometimes I get those ‘moments’ when I realize that I’m real and then I think to myself, “What have I done to myself?”. I’m just so weird. I’m constantly mad at myself. I just can’t stand myself.

I always hope for the worst things to happen to me. Waiting for a car to hit me or something. I just want to die. I’m such a hassle for people to deal with. Everybody hates me. I agree with them though – there is nothing good about me; I can’t even name one thing.

So fed up of myself. **** my life.

[LelouchLamperouge]

Originally Posted by bubbles00

I feel like such a burden to the world. I feel so pathetic and useless. I’m and insult to humanity. Why do I even exist? I have no purpose. I just can never seem to satisfy anybody.

I also can’t stop crying. I can’t get out of bed. I can’t concentrate on reading anything (have to read everything 10+ times to make sense out of it or tell people to talk slowly).

I just hate myself a lot. I want to hurt myself but I’m so tired out of my mind to get up and do something. I feel like I’m such a burden to people. I feel like crying all the time. It’s hard for me to even hold back my tears (and it doesn’t even matter where I am; I just start crying). I cry myself to sleep basically every night. I feel so ******.

I’m so ashamed of who I am. Sometimes I get those ‘moments’ when I realize that I’m real and then I think to myself, “What have I done to myself?”. I’m just so weird. I’m constantly mad at myself. I just can’t stand myself.

I always hope for the worst things to happen to me. Waiting for a car to hit me or something. I just want to die. I’m such a hassle for people to deal with. Everybody hates me. I agree with them though – there is nothing good about me; I can’t even name one thing.

So fed up of myself. **** my life.

I'm sorry you feel like that. I don't really have any words of advice but I know exactly how you feel because I feel the same way and it's terrible. I always feel like I'm a burden to everyone and my family and the world would be better without my existence. I really don't have any value for my own self as a human being. Hopefully we both can find a way to feel better about ourselves sometime near in the future.

[waterknob1234]

Hi Bubbles. I understand how you feel because so often I feel the same way. Depression makes us hate ourselves and depression will tell you that you are stupid, worthless, a burden. You are a very good and valuable person who is suffering and needs help. Are you seeing a pdoc or therapist? If not, maybe see a medical doc who can maybe start you on an antidepressant and get you some help?
Don't give in and don't give up. Get help. You deserve this. And keep posting to us. We care about you.

[artichack]

Waterknobb hit it on the button.....get help....your not worthless...there is treatment for your symptoms....just the rotten disease of depression running your day to day....seek professional help.....there is a light at the end of the tunnel.....take care...Artie

[MotherMarcus]

bubbles : You are not alone. I've often felt as if I'm teetering on the edge of a black hole. Somehow, I found just a tiny nugget of strength that gets me moving.
Search for you nugget and get help. Not gonna be easy. Please stay with us and keep us updated.

[bubbles00]

Thank you guys. No I'm I'm not seeing anybody about this though I know I should. I'll probably go try and get an appointment next week or something (highly doubt it'll help me though; doesn't seem like anything in the world can help me).

Originally Posted by MotherMarcus

bubbles : You are not alone. I've often felt as if I'm teetering on the edge of a black hole. Somehow, I found just a tiny nugget of strength that gets me moving.
Search for you nugget and get help. Not gonna be easy. Please stay with us and keep us updated.

You see I can't find that 'tiny nugget'. any goals I did have at one point are all gone; smashed and shredded to pieces. I feel so worthless like I can't be helped. I don't have anything and I don't want anything anymore (and it seems like I'm not very deserving to get anything anyways).

[Marla500]

You can be helped. I am speaking to myself also because I feel the same way. We can be helped. We just have to reach out a little bit first. There is help for us.