[Envectus]

Hello, I am David I am 26 years old never had a girlfriend have few friends most make fun of me, I blush a lot I am very shy and don't socialize and I don't know how to talk to people specially girls.
I am skinny and lonely person always at home in front of computer I tried to read book to boost my confidence but didn't work, I tried to do some exercise but I couldn't talk to people...

I see all my friends even some similar to my condition started to become successful specially around girls.

I really am depressed I cant make friends everyone is talking bad about me, I can't get a job I have no money I am a complete mess and I cannot afford a psych doc..

I am really having suicide thoughts, I started to not care about my life I drink a lot and drive like a maniac, it's like my fear of my life is gone.
The only thing keeping me from ending myself is my parents... I don't want to make them feel sad about me.

Please I really have the motivation to change, but every time I mess up badly and the depression increase and suicide thoughts increase too, and my anger level and my violence too.

HELP!

[Crazy Hitch]

(((Envectus)))



Intrusive thoughts are difficult to carry alone.

When they become too difficult to carry please ring someone.

We are here to listen.

Common Hotline Phone Numbers | Psych Central

[CANDC]

Welcome to Psych Central (PC) Envectus. Sorry you are in such extreme distress. Most people will contact their therapist or psychiatrist when they have suicidal thoughts.

A safety plan is important.
Psych Central - Search results for Safety plan for suicide

Many people here get a diagnosis from a psychiatrist with meds that can help stabilize things.

Some people at PC will find a therapist will help them sort out the roots of their life.

Please feel free to private message any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

Some people find the forums give them the compassion and empathy they seek. http://forums.psychcentral.com

[kaliope]

hi envectus
the way i changed was I came up with one indisputable fact. one good thing about me that I could not deny no matter how bad or depressed I felt about myself. for me it was that I was a good writer. I have always gotten A's on my papers for as long as I can remember and write professional evaluations today that receive praise. there is no denying that I am a good writer. so when I started running off that list of bad things in my head, I could say, yeah, but I am a good writer to compliment myself and feel good instead of bad. soon I found more good things about me and added them to the list. it took awhile but eventually I started believing that I was a good person with these good qualities. this is how I started feeling better about myself.welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((( hugs )))))))))

We care here.. Please keep posting

[Rohag]

Hello & Welcome, David. How traditional is your family? Do certain family obligations weigh on you?

Please make yourself at home here.

[sideblinded]

A little late of a welcome to PC but welcome to PC.. I feel for you. Thoughts and feelings are always changing so please hang in there and keep reaching out. We are your audience if you need to talk things out.

[vital]

Hi David,

I think you should see your MD or a therapist right away and don't do anything foolish in the mean time! You have a future where you can feel absolutely wonderful. Don't throw it away for nothing.

Here's my best advice

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

- vital

Originally Posted by vital

Hi David,

I think you should see your MD or a therapist right away and don't do anything foolish in the mean time! You have a future where you can feel absolutely wonderful. Don't throw it away for nothing.

Here's my best advice

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

- vital

You are entitled to your opinion but people and opinions are not infallible. And there are all sorts of reasons for people to claim they have the cure, whether its prescriptions or plans like the one suggested above. PROFIT is a big motivator for good and bad. Investigate and find out for yourself whether the person making a claim has a good clean record or why he might or might not be approving of any given plan. I'm curious why your "about me" in your profile is blank.

You make several statements that I find presumptious and offensive. Here is one instance:

I suspect that in almost all cases of depression, a serious attempt at some combination of 1 and 2 above will greatly help or completely solve the problem, but that’s really only a guess on my part. Meditation is a good example of the need to try seriously, I think.

Your statement seems to suggest to me that I have just not made a serious attempt to deal with my problems. You don't know me, have never seen me, know nothing about what I've done and not done. As for meditation, someone in the grips of suicidal thinking or of overwhelming depression is not going to be able to simply meditate his/her way out of their problem. You can't just sit down and say "okay I'm going to meditate" PRESTO all better. You do admit, yourself, that your statement is "just a guess" yet here you are telling people you don't know how to fix their lives.

I have to ask myself a legitimate question: could your "that's just my opinion" statement be merely an attempt to protect yourself legally if a catastrophe occurs because of someone taking your advice instead of the advice of his physician/psychiatrist. Maybe you could cinvince the court that your "my opinion" statement precludes attachment of any of the funds in your bank account because of contributory negligence or other fault on your part.

Which is another reason to doubt your claim. The dichotomy you present - how can you so forcefully say "here's the answer" and then a few words away say "I'm just guessing"?

For myself, I will say that I have been helped by medication for suicide stress, anxiety attacks etc. Sometimes people need help sooner than can be had possibly thru alternatives. I know some of the RX can take several weeks to begin to make a difference, I've experienced that. But there are two that I can think of that I noticed an improvement within 2 days, even a difference the very first day. I am not optimistic about my survival should something happen where i could no longer get my medications and the thought, albeit fleeting, comes to me when I'm needing a refill WHAT IF i can't get them this time.

I have become naturally suspicious of just about everything I hear and read, thru experience I have found this necessary. And while you may be onto something, i think its dangerous to undermine someone's opinion or choice to take medication suggesting that they are being mislead or cheated by charletains. Some people are very suggestible and may not be able to weigh the evidence themselves and are ready to grab at any chance however remote.

There are side effects to the medication I take, one being that because of dry mouth I have had a lot more cavities than would be normal especially considering I am very conscientious about brushing my teeth. But the tradeoff for me, in an all too fallible world, is worth it.

I've had people tell me empirically YOU DON'T NEED DRUGS, I have never even taken an aspirin in my lifetime. My response would be "you're extremely fortunate for whatever reason - be grateful for it and not judgmental'. Not just about depression but migraines for example, Until I found something that would help with these debilitating headaches that made it difficult to move or tolerate any light at all, I could make no plans to do anything or see anyone because my life revolved around whether or not I got one of those terrible headaches. I have been and will always be eternally grateful for the years I did not have to suffer from migraines, they still come but can almost always be managed withing 30 minutes or so.

I urge people not to disregard prescriptions as a possible source of help - do your own investigation and make up your own mind please. Just because someone has supposedly been blessed thru good genes or other variable does not mean everyone is that way. not everyone gets cancer that doesn't mean cancer doesn't exist.

Keep an open mind - those of you trying to decide whether or not to try prescriptions. it's your life - take an active role in such an important decision. Decide for yourself.

[doyoutrustme]

many therapist and doctors work on sliding scales. try a hotline and see where that takes you. It takes work, but therapy makes a big difference. and compared to the end of your life, money is a small price to pay.

[Bird Feeder]

Whoa....little lost....I think your response was a little over the top. Did you know that posting in all caps is in essence yelling? No ones post here deserved that kind of response. I think everyone is just trying to be helpful in any way they can.

[unhappydaze]

Envectus, thanks for writing that. It's so hard to say anything to anybody.

[nyancola]

i know its hard but try not to let your social interactions define how you feel about yourself.

if your friends make fun of you it may be because they feel they are just that familiar with you. friends make fun of each other, but sometimes its hard to tell if its coming from the right place. if its not coming from the right place then i dont think you dont need friends like that. but keep in mind how we feel about ourselves can effect how we see the actions/intentions of others.

people can often sense social insecurities in others, it can cause awkward interactions. but dont take it personally, just know that they are as unsure as you when they sense that.

[puzzclar]

Welcome to PC!!! I'm so glad that you are joining us and reaching out for help here. Don't be afraid to ask for help, there are those around you just waiting for you to ask. No one knows what you are thinking, you have to tell them. Keep posting, it does help to vent.

[waterknob1234]

Hi Envectus and welcome to pc. We are glad you are here. I am glad you are reaching out for help, that is the first step. Posting here helps because everyone understands what you are going thru and how you feel. When you feel your worst, always reach out to someone. If there is a crisis line where you live, call and see if they can find you therapy on a sliding scale.

[unhappydaze]

Originally Posted by nyancola

friends make fun of each other, but sometimes its hard to tell if its coming from the right place

Oh lord yes. When I was 17, 18 it seemed like everything I did & said came out wrong, insensitive, or worse. And I was an outcast who should have exhibited more sensitivity to those like me, not to mention those in worse places. Unlike the cool kids I did not have the excuse of ignorance.

[lonely-and-sad]

Hi Evectus did you ever seek help? How are you doing now?