[JohnCrow]

Had hope. Lost it.
I really thought I had this one. No call = no job
I have no idea what to do. I am so weary of applying for jobs, even looking at my professional email makes me feel queasy. Job searching is like having a **** job, that doesn't pay, the hours never end, and the only way you can tell you're doing the job right is when you lose it!
I decided to book an appointment with the therapist I had seen for my depression a few months back but could not see regularly because I was working a fair distance away and any appointment would have required me to take at least a half day off and, being a temp, this would mean no pay. And, well ****, he retired. So, if I want to speak to someone there I have to go back to my primary care physician to be referred again.
But I don't have one. I was referred by a walk in, which means I will have to there and start from scratch
I think I could handle hopelessness - I just can't take having hope dangled in front of me every so often

[mazing]

I'm sorry to hear you have had so much trouble linking back in with a therapist. I know it seems hopeless now but it won't always be like this. Job hunting is the worst! You are right - it takes a lot of time, effort and setbacks when you don't get the job... but eventually you will get the call.

I really would encourage you to take the steps to link in with a therapist when you are ready. It sounds like it really might help at the moment for you to have someone to talk to. I know that is a long drawn out process but it might be worthwile

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by JohnCrow

I just can't take having hope dangled in front of me every so often

Me too. Long ago I reached the point where hope was simply not useful to me in dealing with depression.

Wishing you success with the job hunt and hoping the job hunt doesn't burn you out so that you can't do the job you may eventually find...

[Fuzzybear]

[JohnCrow]

Remember how I said I had to be re-referred from my healthcare provider, which was a nearby walk in

I said had because it is now closed

So now I have no health care provider, no therapist, no way to get one without going to emergency (and, as **** as it is, it isn't that bad. Yet)

I am trying not to get angry. Trying so hard

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by JohnCrow

it isn't that bad. Yet

Will you be able to tell when it is that bad? Should you act to get emergency help before you get to a place when you will not be able to act safely?

[Fuzzybear]

[Ruftin]

(((John))) I have to agree with Rohag. The ER is not so bad a place to start and perhaps they can help you find the help you need somewhere closer to where you live.

[vital]

Originally Posted by JohnCrow

Remember how I said I had to be re-referred from my healthcare provider, which was a nearby walk in

I said had because it is now closed

So now I have no health care provider, no therapist, no way to get one without going to emergency (and, as **** as it is, it isn't that bad. Yet)

I am trying not to get angry. Trying so hard

Hi John,

I'm sorry to hear about your troubles, but surprised too. I thought that the Canadian health care system was much better than ours down here in the USA? At least you still have the internet.

In my experience, job hunting is just about the hardest and most stressful thing you can possibly think of doing when you're depressed. Of course, the necessity of job hunting typically hits you at your very lowest. It's very, very tough.

You've probably seen it, but here is my best stuff for depression:

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

http://egg.bu.edu/~youssef/SNAP_CLUB...0164151576.pdf

Lately I am also fond of this video that I learned about from festidump:

About self-compassion and generally giving yourself a break.

- vital