[boomerango]

Hi All here, great thread to support whole-person healing! Thank you!
When I feel very lost and dark, I come to Psych Central forums because I find company. I'm not so alone here. It's a sort of AA meeting for me. I'm grateful to everyone for the sharing.

So, yeah, today I feel lost and dark. Mostly, I am full of grief over life's losses, anhedonia, and fatigue. I take meds, have tried so many, but nothing reaches the deep depression. Everything makes me tired. the strong anhedonia persists. Hesitant to ask for stimulant, so drink lots of coffee. I eat too much sugar, but otherwise healthy. I have pets, acupuncture and massage, which help, but not enough exercise. I see a good therapist. Good family support from afar. I can survive and work. Days off are too often non-productive. There is some depression cycle that I can't pin down, even though I track it on a calendar. That's it.

[little turtle]

Originally Posted by boomerango

Hi All here, great thread to support whole-person healing! Thank you!
When I feel very lost and dark, I come to Psych Central forums because I find company. I'm not so alone here. It's a sort of AA meeting for me. I'm grateful to everyone for the sharing.

So, yeah, today I feel lost and dark. Mostly, I am full of grief over life's losses, anhedonia, and fatigue. I take meds, have tried so many, but nothing reaches the deep depression. Everything makes me tired. the strong anhedonia persists. Hesitant to ask for stimulant, so drink lots of coffee. I eat too much sugar, but otherwise healthy. I have pets, acupuncture and massage, which help, but not enough exercise. I see a good therapist. Good family support from afar. I can survive and work. Days off are too often non-productive. There is some depression cycle that I can't pin down, even though I track it on a calendar. That's it.

have you had a good physical exam and blood testing

[boomerango]

Originally Posted by little turtle

have you had a good physical exam and blood testing

Thank you for asking! yes, all looks normal. Due again in July.
I'm trying to run all the bases and resources...

Originally Posted by Altered Moment

Yes you are right the depressions are more unpredictable now. My whole life I could tell you which month and for how long it would last. Like every spring the first week it gets hot I guarantee I will get a real bad one that lasts a month or so. Last May was exactly that. I almost checked myself inpatient.

I know myself well too but I am also scared. Scared of the unknown.

Originally Posted by little turtle

dechandawa brought up an interesting point on another thread.....she said that a 15 minute walk after a meal was as good as a longer walk at some other time in preventing pre-diabetes...that is something I am going to try today....I will do 15 minute walks after bkfst and lunch...

How are you doing with your 15 minutes walks? I had big trouble in getting started. It felt almost impossible. I used a long time to be able to do my physical activity. I did relaxation exercises. I found a sound track at net about birds singing and water falls. That sound really calmed me down. I'm so found of nature. The sound track activated some good memories. After that I was able to walk for almost 1/2 an hour. I was tired afterward.

I have decided that it is OK to have start-trouble. (Been inactive since before Christmas). I cannot afford to lose so much time trying to motivate myself for activity tomorrow (am a student for the time being). I have an appointment with my GP at Wednesday, so I will skip the activity that day as well.

Have decided to try again at Thursday. Hope I will not use so much time on motivating myself, but if that happens I will have to live with that. One has to be patient to be able to recover from depression ...

Well, I didn't run out of the house this day, but I didn't use an amount of time motivating myself either. I remembered that physical activity is crucial for the whole body, physical as well as psychological. After a little pushing I was outside walking for 25 minutes.

It is good to know that I was able to do the required. I will try to motivate myself for tomorrow as well and I have started to think about how I can be able to eat regularly.

For the time being I feel it difficult to plan ahead. I feel some sort of a hopelessness.

Writing here may be seen as some sort of cry for help, in hope of just to see some tiny rays of light.

I will try to motivate myself to sit as long as I can with my private journal, trying to plan how to go on with life.

Need some hugs

[little turtle]

Originally Posted by Singer47

For the time being I feel it difficult to plan ahead. I feel some sort of a hopelessness.

Writing here may be seen as some sort of cry for help, in hope of just to see some tiny rays of light.

I will try to motivate myself to sit as long as I can with my private journal, trying to plan how to go on with life.

Need some hugs

this site is crucial for all of us...singer 47 has opened up a ray of HOPE here..